Wedding Etiquette Forum

engagement party?

Does one need an engagement party or will announcements suffice?  We live in a seperate area away from our family and friends.  I think it will just be a hassle due to distance.  With social network and sites such as this, an engagement party just seems sort of moot as well.  Would dinner with both sets of parents be the equivalent?

Re: engagement party?

  • I didn't have either and everyone still found out that H and I were engaged and getting married.

  • You can always put your engagement announcement in the local paper but never send out engagement announcements.

    Most of the young women I know have had engagement parties, ranging from a casual gtg for cocktails to meet the parents all the way to The Supper Club for 200.

    FOB gave an engagement party at his clubhouse for about 80.  (NO, exacty 80 because the MOG had a problem with it being to family and BP members so I remember)
  • hoffsehoffse member
    Fifth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Love Its First Answer
    PP is correct - engagement announcements go in the newspaper, but aren't mailed.  There may be some stationery vendors who sell "engagement announcements" but that's because it's an area where they can make money on brides who don't know better.  

    The only announcements that should be sent to people directly are wedding announcements (which you usually send the day of or the day after the wedding), baby announcements, and "we've moved" announcements so people can update their address books. 

    As for the e-party. they aren't necessary.  My parents and FI's parents and our immediate families all got together for dinner and a Christmas concert soon after we were engaged just to sort of meet and chat - our parents had met casually before but had never had a conversation more than in passing.  We did not have an engagement party, and I don't regret it.  It would have stressed me out, and it requires you to formulate a guest list for your wedding very early on.  You shouldn't invite people to an engagement party who aren't being invited to the wedding, so if you're having a longer engagement (FI and I are having a 1.5 year engagement) you may not have the guest list fully set yet.  FI and I STILL don't have the guest list fully set yet - we know how many seats each group of people (us, his parents, my parents) are getting, but we still haven't heard back from his parents about who they want on the list.  And we're now 9 months out.
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