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MOH dilemma

saraannevanssaraannevans
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in Moms and Maids

My sister is supposed to be my MOH. The problem is her and I do not get along very well, we are 7 years apart in age and have really nothing in common. The only time I really talk to her is when I am home from college and she happens to be at my parents' house. I know I should just keep her as my MOH because she is my sister but I'd rather have my best friend as MOH. What should I do? Anyone else have this problem?

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Re: MOH dilemma

  • Beachy730Beachy730 member
    First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_moh-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:04940023-ec37-44b9-981d-67b15ab1f53aPost:9d4148e4-e975-4dec-ab71-eabb8c90d095">MOH dilemma</a>:
    [QUOTE]My sister is supposed to be my MOH. The problem is her and I do not get along very well, we are 7 years apart in age and have really nothing in common. The only time I really talk to her is when I am home from college and she happens to be at my parents' house. I know I should just keep her as my MOH because she is my sister but I'd rather have my best friend as MOH. What should I do? Anyone else have this problem?
    Posted by saraannevans[/QUOTE]

    If you already asked her to be your MOH you cannot demote her.  It would likely cause a lifetime of hard feelings and resentment, and that is not worth it over one day of your life.  Why would you ask her to be your MOH if you aren't close with her?  Your only other option is to make your friend also a MOH, but I don't personally like 2 MOHs.  Are either of them married?  If so, the married one would be Matron and the single one Maid. 
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  • ekilzer1ekilzer1 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_moh-dilemma?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:04940023-ec37-44b9-981d-67b15ab1f53aPost:a43177d6-467c-4d96-bcae-969b5dee988b">Re: MOH dilemma</a>:
    [QUOTE] Why would you ask her to be your MOH if you aren't close with her? 
    Posted by dnbeach12[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Ditto!!!! i am not sure why you felt obligated to make her your MOH.... unfortunately you are stuck with her. You could always have a second MOH if you really want your friend to have the position too. </div>
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  • ichellemay1ichellemay1
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    2 Maids or Matrons of Honor would be fine.

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  • lalap69lalap69 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Have 2 MOHs.  That way you keep your sister (if you demote her, you're looking at HUGE family drama and probably irreparably harming your relationship with her) and you get to have your BFF as well.
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  • frogurt814frogurt814
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yep, either have two MOHs or just leave your sister as MOH and your friend as BM. 
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  • deepcovejackiedeepcovejackie
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Have 2 MOH's.  You can't demote your sister, that would look really bad on your part.
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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    They're both purely ceremonial and honorary positions and people read far, far too much into the titles.  Keep your sister as your MOH.  Keep your friend as your BM.  After your wedding, take your friend out for a lovely dinner and thank her for being such a good friend during your wedding planning.

    I can promise you that not a single guest really gives a flying fig about whether someone is a MOH or BM.  Don't make this bigger than it is.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
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  • Muffin'sMomMuffin'sMom
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Why is it that people don't think these things through BEFORE they ask.  If you have never gotten along with her before, why would you think it would be different now?

    You can have two MOH's if you like, but unless you want the family drama ofthe century, you arestuck with her.
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  • RMacQueenRMacQueen member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I have a friend whose parents basically forced her to pick the younger sis at MOH. She talks about how much she regrets it all the time. However, it you have already asked then it's too late. 
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