THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...

Kate61487 · July 2012

Just logged on to Facebook to find this on my newsfeed:

"HELP!! Does anyone know a venue for a reception that could hold 200-300 people that would be available with 2 mo advanced notice?? The place I booked is not going to be big enough for all the people that got invited.

"

Making sure your venue and your guest list match in size prevents you from looking for a new venue two months out.

lyndausvi · July 2012

I so agree. I can't believe people just pick a venue based on some random round number without figuring a guest list first.

Our guest list was pretty locked down 15 months out. Then we added 20% for people we might have forgotten or relationships changes, etc.

achiduck · July 2012

Oh dear lord. I don't understand why this is such a difficult concept for some people.

willywally5 · July 2012

I love how the damsel in distress phrases it: The venue "is not going to be big enough for all the people that got invited.

"

How did all those people GET invited? Hmmmm.

That would be a mess. A mess of their own doing, but still a mess.

Kate61487 · July 2012

We figured our list would end up about 250, and in my town if it holds more than 200 then it holds 300 so we had a nice cushion. I just can't imagine taking that risk vs. cutting the list or finding a big enough venue ahead of time.

Simply Fated · July 2012

I guess they were hoping for people to RSVP no? Insane.

lyndausvi · July 2012

I bet they thought everyone wouldn't show.

I know a couple who had a DW and thought only 60-70 would come. 110 said yes. They didn't have the money to have the type of wedding they wanted so at the last minute they had to cut the food way back and made it a cash bar. Their guests were not happy.

*** this was not a cash bar crowd at all.

Lizzieyounce · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:46a2da81-a89e-420d-ac88-416552e2d7f3">Re: THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]I bet they thought everyone wouldn't show. I know a couple who had a DW and thought only 60-70 would come. 110 said yes. They didn't have the money to have the type of wedding they wanted so at the last minute they had to cut the food way back and made it a cash bar. Their guests were not happy. *** this was not a cash bar crowd at all.
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>Ye gods! </div>

shanding4787 · July 2012

That's why I'm so glad our venue holds up to 600 people..I will only come halfway to that number more than likely.

Loopyseven · July 2012

Strikes me as a cart before horse situation if I've ever heard of one.

amorg334 · July 2012

Before we even looked at venues we had a general guest list and a number we knew to follow and only looked at places that held the maxium number or more.

lauraanne9 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:f628d20e-013e-4bbd-9829-0cbcca96290c">THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]Just logged on to Facebook to find this on my newsfeed: "HELP!! Does anyone know a venue for a reception that could hold 200-300 people that would be available with 2 mo advanced notice?? The place I booked is not going to be big enough for all the people that got invited. :(" <strong>Making sure your venue and your guest list match in size prevents you from looking for a new venue two months out</strong>.
Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]

<div>It also apparently keeps you from looking for one via Facebook. Wow. Apparently more people said yes than planned. I mean, I have an "invited" list but I also have a "realistically will come" list. While I hope that all my invited will make it to the wedding, that just isn't reality. However, I booked a venue big enough for the INVITED list.</div>

lauraanne9 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:eae5604c-edda-4565-9793-8748fb5ae44a">Re: THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]I so agree. I can't believe people just pick a venue based on some random round number without figuring a guest list first. Our guest list was pretty locked down 15 months out. Then we added 20% for people we might have forgotten or relationships changes, etc.
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]

<div>Seriously jealous of your planning skills. I did not have the list firm 15 months out. More like about 6 months out. But I was really glad I did it this way, as it also allows for planning of the other stuff...and the estimating of budgets, which is tough to do when you know your guest list will be from 50-500</div>

Cackle6 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:46a2da81-a89e-420d-ac88-416552e2d7f3">Re: THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]I bet they thought everyone wouldn't show. I know a couple who had a DW and thought only 60-70 would come. 110 said yes. They didn't have the money to have the type of wedding they wanted so at the last minute they had to cut the food way back and made it a cash bar. Their guests were not happy. *** this was not a cash bar crowd at all.
Posted by lyndausvi[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>This happened at a destination wedding H and I went to last year. Except in our case, instead of cutting back on food, they made the reception dinner "optional." So we got to pay for our own meal and drinks at the restaurant of the couple's choosing (which thankfully was pretty cheap, but still). We were VERY close to not even going to the dinner, and had we known we would be paying for our own meal before hand, we would not have shelled out all the money on airfare and hotels to even go to the wedding. And after all that we never even got a thank you card because we didn't give a physical gift. Sorry, but your gift was us paying for our own meal!</div><div>
</div><div>Not that I'm still bitter or anything... heh :)</div><div>
</div>

Athsea · July 2012

My cousin is inviting about 300 people to her wedding, her church holds 75. She is well aware of this, and just says people need to show up early and get a seat or they can wait outside.

Kate61487 · July 2012

In Response to Re:THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...:[QUOTE]My cousin is inviting about 300 people to her wedding, her church holds 75. She is well aware of this, and just says people need to show up early and get a seat or they can wait outside.nbsp; Posted by Athsea[/QUOTE]

This is one instance where I wouldn't feel even a little bit guilty about planning to skip the ceremony.

lauraanne9 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:a7fefd9e-e59c-40db-9dd3-d52b3e178fb7">Re: THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]My cousin is inviting about 300 people to her wedding, her church holds 75. She is well aware of this, and just says people need to show up early and get a seat or they can wait outside.
Posted by Athsea[/QUOTE]

<div>Thanks for sharing this. You have NO idea how much better I feel about having to remove children from our guest list to fit all the family in the church.</div>

SB1512 · July 2012

I can't believe people wouldn't think about a guest list before choosing a venue. If anything, give yourself a huge buffer. Even though we didn't have a set guest list when FI and I looked at venues I knew his parents would be handing me a huge list so we made sure that all venues we looked at could hold over 250 poeple. The venue we ended up choosing can actually hold up to 325, and our final guest list is around 225 so we have a nice buffer.

July2012bride · July 2012

Yeah, we had a pretty solid guest list figured out before we even looked at venues (around 170 people). The place we chose can fit 250, so I figured we would be good no matter what relationship changes, etc. there might be.

I can't imagine putting myself in that situation.

a coworker of mine was counting on the 20% rule when they started looking. I told him that we only had a 6% decline rate and he and his FI decided to change venues.

mbuckley85 · July 2012

We were hoping for 175 at most, but our guest list is more like 250 (247 exactly, including all of the bridal party and their significant others)! Fortunately, our venue will hold that many, but it would definitely be more comfortable with between 200 and 220. I think once RSVPs come back I'll be in that ballpark.

We looked at a venue that was suitable for 250-500 guests and decided we couldn't do the space justice. We probably could have, but I'm happier where we are now and everything should be fine.

wright944 · July 2012

I am in a wedding on August 11 and I just went to her bridal shower on Sunday and she told me that she invited almost 550 people and her venue only holds 290! She is worried because she has only gotten 12 no's back and doesn't know what she is going to do!

That is insane!

mbuckley85 · July 2012

Oh jeez!

Frivian · July 2012

OP I think we are facebook friends with the same person... I also saw that on my newsfeed yesterday.

DMoore421 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:f628d20e-013e-4bbd-9829-0cbcca96290c">THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]Just logged on to Facebook to find this on my newsfeed: "HELP!! Does anyone know a venue for a reception that could hold 200-300 people that would be available with 2 mo advanced notice?? The place I booked is not going to be big enough for all the people that got invited. :(" Making sure your venue and your guest list match in size prevents you from looking for a new venue two months out.
Posted by Kate61487[/QUOTE]

wow - my guest list is 170, room holds 150 - and a lot of the people invited are from out of town and i <strong>know</strong> at least 10 won't come at all - -and have guesses on who the other 10 that won't come will be... pretty sure - but still have to invite them - BUT if by chance I end up over the 150 there is another room I can use for the wedding - it will add more to the cost - but it is doable...

I don't know how you end up with such a large guest list and no alternative this close to the wedding

DMoore421 · July 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_this-is-why-you-dont-invite-more-people-than-your-venue-holds?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:93738e0c-d932-4962-b4d8-8b81bb45471cPost:e950d32f-9778-424b-bd5f-f271a7326038">Re: THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...</a>:
[QUOTE]I am in a wedding on August 11 and I just went to her bridal shower on Sunday and she told me that she invited almost 550 people and her venue only holds 290! She is worried because she has only gotten 12 no's back and doesn't know what she is going to do! That is insane!
Posted by wright944[/QUOTE]

that is absolutely insane

LibbyC730 · July 2012

550?! I don't think I even have that many facebook friends! : )

THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...

Re: THIS is why you don't invite more people than your venue holds...

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