Rude or Not?? Not asking someone who was in your bridal party before to be in the party this time ar

Lauren Frost · January 2012

About 2 years ago I was engaged and my cousin was a bridesmaid. The engagement was called off and the relationship ended. I am now planning a wedding (w/ the right one this time) and am wondering if it would be rude to not ask my cousin to be in the wedding party again, just invite her to the wedding. Nothing bad has happened between us. We just never talk anymore... we live in completely diferent states, though we were close growing up...

em01092 · January 2012

If it's a new enagement, especially a different guy, then no, I don't think you need to ask her again.

Are you planning to ask all of the other same BMs? Not gonna lie, I'd be kind of hurt if I was the only one from the original WP not asked the 2nd time around, but if you have grown apart and don't talk anymore, she may not expect you to ask her anyway. Just be prepared for her to possibly be a little upset.

Worst comes to worse, just ask her. All she has to do is show up in a dress. It may not be worth pissing off your family members over. And she may decline anyway.

Lauren Frost · January 2012

No, the only person that will be the same in my bridal party will be my sister as my MOH. Keeping the long story short...after my ex and I broke up, the friend department for me widened extremely....but that was all I was allowed to have in my last wedding was my sister and one other person. this one will be the one I've dreamed. I also dont want to cause any hurt feelings in my family, I understand this is MY and my FIANCES big day, but I dont "one" day to ruin any family relationships to have

graysquirrel · January 2012

The general rule is that if it is a new realtionship it is ok to have a different WP. If you are only having one peson the same from last time, then I don't think she will feel too awful. I would just invite her and be very happy to see her there and not mention anything about her not being a BM. The worst thing would be to explain to her why she isn't one this time.

LuckyGirl1713 · January 2012

You don't have to ask her, but if i was your cousin i might be a little upset. i probably wouldnt say anything but i would be hurt. she may be hurt too. just something to think about.

sweetcanadian1979 · January 2012

I would just include her to be honest. Not having the same members as last time doesn't fly when there was only 2 of them, therefore obvious you are excluding her. I would just ask if she would like to be one this time, have her show up in a dress & then choose whomever else youw ant.

msuprincess04 · January 2012

I could understand her being a little bummed, but if the relationship between you changed, then it shouldn't hurt it. I stood up with one of my best friends from high school and college. Then she got divorced and remarried and I wasn't even invited to the second wedding. Though, during that time, I moved across the country and we don't have much contact anymore. I don't think it'll be a big deal. Ask your nearest and dearest. It's what they are for.

mbody · January 2012

I think that since it is a new engagement and time has passed, you don't have to include her if your relationship with with her has changed. Ask your closest friends/family to be in the WP.

annvath89 · January 2012

I don't think it is rude at all. Things change, people change, your stil showing her you care and want her to be part of your big day by asking her to be there to celebrate.