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Moms and Maids

Looking for opinions

So, for hairstyles for the wedding, I am planning on suprising my fiance with wearing my hair down.  Its long and thick, I just want it up and away from my face but I am going to wear it half up and down to make him happy.  I have a veil to wear.  My question is, what do I do about my bridesmaids, I have 6 and want to tell them do whatever they want, as long as its up, because I like the way that looks.  But I dont want to seem too controlling, they are wearing matching dresses and shoes (in a dark purple - lapis according to David's Bridal). I also have a flower girl, and I think Im going to buy her a tiara to wear in her hair. 
Anyways, might seem silly, but was hoping for some feedback or suggestions.  Would it look ok with all the girls, some up, some down some half and half?

Thanks!
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Re: Looking for opinions

  • edited December 2011
    Please don't do that.  Let everyone wear the style that they are comfortable and look beautiful in.  Some people look horrible with their hair up, some feel stupid dressed up with their hair down, and some people have hair that is very difficult to put up at all.  No one is going to mistake who YOU are because of your hairstyle...I promise!
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  • mandi921vhmandi921vh member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Please do not dictate how your BMs should wear their hair. Let them do their hair in a way that makes them feel comfortable. 
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  • edited December 2011

    I don't think it would look strange at all for everyone to have a different hairstyle - whether its up, down, half up, etc.  In fact, I like the variety!

    Also, the girls will look and feel much better in a hairstyle they love.  And that in turn will translate to happier friends, more smiles and better pictures!!!

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  • edited December 2011
    Thanks :)

    Both weddings I have been in I was told, anyway as long as its up. 
    I didnt mind because I like my hair professionally done up as its so thick I dont do it myself.
    But wanted everyone to feel most comfortable and didnt want to seem like a control freak, same dress, shoes, hair, etc.

    Thanks for the input!
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  • edited December 2011
    I am also of the same thought to let everyone wear a style they are comfortable in.  My daughter-in-law to be is going to let her brides maids wear what they are comfortable with.  The tiara sounds adorable!
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  • edited December 2011
    What I am doing is I told them to atleast have curl and keep it out of there face, so what they do from there is all up to them.  I don't think all different hairstyles would look bad.
  • KnibletKniblet member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I HATE wearing my hair up, no matter who does it for me (myself or hair stylist).  I look at myself with hair up and it makes my face look bigger.

    Don't tell them how to wear their hair.  Let them decide. 
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  • BunniKakesBunniKakes member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Ask them - do it individually and only if you sincerely want an honest answer. 'How were you planning on wearing your hair?'

    I have three bridesmaids. After my hair/makeup trial, I gave them all the *option* to get in on using the woman doing my hair and makeup. I was very clear with them that I couldn't cover the fee and I was only giving them an opportunity, not a passive-aggressive request. All three decided to do their own hair and makeup. 

    A month before the wedding, my 'most experienced' bridesmaid started a conversation among the three and they agreed to wear pearl necklaces and half-up hair. I have an excessive love of symmetry - which they know - and this made me happy, but I *did not* ask them to do it.

    Wanting things to look a certain way after investing so much time, energy, effort, money, etc into planning a single day does not make you a bad person. Being unreasonable about getting your way on it might make you an unpopular one.

    I don't know you. I don't know your bridesmaids. It might matter to you. That fact alone would not make you a bridezilla. Bring it up to gauge opinions, but recognize you might not get your way.

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  • edited December 2011
    @Bunni - Thank you!!
    I also have a love for symmetry, which I know my MOH knows, so Im leaving it in her capable hands to scope out the girls and how they want to have their hair done.  I took someone elses advice on this topic and just said, it has to be away from their faces.  I am going to give (as part of their present) matching earrings and a necklace.  I think giving them the option will be the best route.

    Thanks for the input!
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  • EnamiEnami member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'd say tell them something general, like; keep it out of your face, keep hair accesories to what was decided beforehand, things like that. But I think saying do what you want as long as its up/half up isn't being to controlling at all. If any have issues, you can always be flexible.
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  • aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_looking-opinions?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:f16be613-8990-4d57-9802-94f50199ef75Post:556e73d8-b761-41a3-9966-a26bf5e054a1">Re: Looking for opinions</a>:
    [QUOTE]What I am doing is I told them to atleast have curl and keep it out of there face, so what they do from there is all up to them.  I don't think all different hairstyles would look bad.
    Posted by mehgan11[/QUOTE]
    You do realize that some people (like me) have hair that won't curl at gunpoint, right?  So you're forcing those people to either spend a ton of money on a hairdo, or accept that their hair is going to look awful within about 30 minutes.  Way to go.
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