Friend not engaged but posting rings/ dresses on FB constantly

Re: Friend not engaged but posting rings/ dresses on FB constantly

• bethsmiles member

  

  January 2013

  I don't think it's your place to tell her what to post on FB. She is an adult she can make her own decisions.

  
  

  
  

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• steign member

  

  January 2013

  I agree with Beth.
  
  If she wants to look BSC then that's her deal. You aren't her keeper and you don't need to tell her what she can and cannot post on Facebook. People on my friends list post annoying and stupid pictures, links, and political rants all the time but, it's their page. I can choose to unadd them at any time. The same way they can unfriend me if they don't like what I post.
  
  It sounds like you want to be a good friend to her and let her know she needs to stop and enjoy her relationship as it is this moment but, in the end it's her life and if she chooses to preplan and ruin the experience of it then that is on her, and not you.

  
  
  

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• audrewuh member

  

  January 2013

  It sounds like rough things are coming her way, but keep in mind that it's her relationship and only she knows what's really going on between the two of them. Try not to judge him. If she asks you what you think, then you have the right to tell her, but keep in mind she may not want to hear it and may get upset. 

  
  

  Unless she brings it up to you, you can't really say anything. It's also up to her to look like a crazy person on facebook, unfortunately. 

  
  

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  "You're our early 20's BSC scarecrow. They cower at your maturity." - lennonkdc

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• Simply Fated member

  

  January 2013

  What they post on facebook is totally up to them. If they decide to go back and delete it off their timeline, that's up to them, too. It's not like telling your friend she has toilet paper on her shoe. She's aware of what's she's doing and that's up to her.

  
  

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• leia1979 member

  

  January 2013

  If she asks, be honest with her. But I think it would be really awkward to bring this up any other way.

  
  
  
  I haz a planning bio

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  January 2013

  I realize we all make judgements of other people in our own heads. (Trust me, i'm not guilt free here) However, I have learned it is best to butt out when it comes to other people's relationships. Like everyone else who's posted, I don't really think it's your place to get involved.
  
  I have a girlfriend who got married to her BF within the first 9 months of their relationship. At the time I thought it was super fast and questioned the fact that he'd been divorced and she hadn't dated much in college. Now they've been married for almost 3 years and have a beautiful baby boy. Goodness was I wrong. They are one of the best marriage and parenting role model couples in my life right now...and they seem truly happy.
  
  Let your friend make her own choices. Be there to support her and love her. No one needs an extra critic in their lives, but we can all use a great friend.

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• [Deleted User] member

  

  January 2013

  In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_friend-not-engaged-but-posting-rings-dresses-on-fb-constantly?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:4b910f09-c091-441c-aa12-f9c9464d428ePost:f20dff1e-43f8-406f-b7ea-e1a6e45b792f">Re: Friend not engaged but posting rings/ dresses on FB constantly</a>:
  [QUOTE]I realize we all make judgements of other people in our own heads. (Trust me, i'm not guilt free here) However, I have learned it is best to butt out when it comes to other people's relationships. Like everyone else who's posted, I don't really think it's your place to get involved. I have a girlfriend who got married to her BF within the first 9 months of their relationship. At the time I thought it was super fast and questioned the fact that he'd been divorced and she hadn't dated much in college. Now they've been married for almost 3 years and have a beautiful baby boy. Goodness was I wrong. They are one of the best marriage and parenting role model couples in my life right now...and they seem truly happy. Let your friend make her own choices. <strong>Be there to support her and love her. No one needs an extra critic in their lives, but we can all use a great friend.</strong>
  Posted by allusive007[/QUOTE]
  
  This. I love what you said here. Well said.

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• kmbryant2413 member

  

  February 2013

  It's entirely possible that she is having a rough time in her relationship, but it still dreaming and hoping for the best, and that dreaming and hoping includes looking extensively at wedding things and details.

  
  

  I'm pretty sure a lot of people on facebook tailor what they post so to others, it appears that they are happy and living the dream. Especially if she is friends with a lot of old highschool classmates, etc. Everyone LOVES to creep on everyone on facebook. It's social media behavior.

  
  

  If she's doing either of these things they aren't wrong, they might just be ways of helping her cope. It doesn't mean she's delusional about her relationship or just pretending nothing is wrong. That's obvious by the fact that she cries to you. Just be a listening ear, a kind word, and wait and see what happens.

  
  

  If her posts on facebook bother you that much, either block her, or don't receive her status updates. I believe facebook offers both of these alternatives. Not being mean here, I've just done the exact thing myself so that's what /I/ feel like might be going on

  my blog - for the love of ein
  'Next time, just fart.' - BriSox81
  

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