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Having a friend be the officiant

radev104radev104 member
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in Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions
Has anyone had a friend be their officiant for their wedding? I'm thinking of having one of our friends do it but want others opinions about it.
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Re: Having a friend be the officiant

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    tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    My ex- and I did that. We asked his best friend (who was already best man) and my sister (who was already MOH) to get ordained online to officiate our ceremony. It worked out wonderfully. It was personal and exactly what we wanted. Basically we wrote the ceremony, but left places where they could add something of their own if they wanted to (in the welcome, for example). My ex- and I have since divorced, but people still tell me occasionally how wonderful and memorable our ceremony was.
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    Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2010
    My cousin -- 14 years younger and a good friend -- will be our officiant.  We're pumped!!  It will add a level of intimacy to our ceremony that we would not be able replicate with another officiant.

    Good luck!

    ETA: My cousin is a minister (ordained in 2008) in a real, bricks and mortar church.  She is licensed to perform wedding ceremonies.
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    balasjbalasj
    First Comment
    Not to be Debbie Downer on your idea but wanted to point out that  sometimes having close friends do important tasks -other than WP- for the wedding can get a little sticky if you clash down the road about certain details or logistics.  You are really counting on them for a service without which the ceremony will not happen.  Just be sure its not a friend you foresee yourself getting in an argument with as you approach the date.  Its certainly a nice idea - just be careful working through it.  So many posts on here are unfortunately about people who have friendships get rocky right before their event...
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    MLC613MLC613
    First Comment
    My uncle is doing ours! I went to a wedding that had the brides brother in law do it and it was very personal and very sweet! I'd definitely check your city/county that the wedding will be in---just to double check it's ok! We're just planning it out---I am so excited and it's one of my favorite parts of our wedding plans!!!
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    tldhtldh member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_having-friend-officiant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:10Discussion:c80bf5aa-ef5c-401f-b586-4ee3f5278b61Post:af399d7c-9978-4ac4-9a67-26cdc2acfdbf">Re: Having a friend be the officiant</a>:
    [QUOTE]First....CHECK THE LAWS IN YOUR STATE. Some are VERY strict about who is allowed to officiate weddings. Remember that a marriage license is a legal document. I find it highly unlikely that any state will authorize a teenager to officiate. Online ordinations are not legal in every state, either. Call the county clerk's office.
    Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

    THIS!!! A THOUSAND TIMES!!!

    Brother and SIL found out two days before their wedding that their friend's online ordination wasn't good in Georgia where they were getting married.  They went through with the ceremony but everyone there knew they had to high tail it to a judge the next morning for the legal ceremony.
    image
    AKA GoodLuckBear14
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    smokyhillssmokyhills
    First Comment
    We had one of my husband's prof's do ours (he is *awesome*) and it worked out very well. He was able to incorporate everything that we wanted (keep it short, use this quote, let me rickroll the vows, etc), and kept us both much more relaxed than I think we'd otherwise have been. Like PP's have said - check the laws in your area, first.
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    cherrystrange11cherrystrange11
    First Comment
    My friends got married at the beginning of December and had one of their best friends marry them. It was a beautiful ceremony and everything worked out very well. It was nice to see someone so close to them be able to marry them. I think he had everyone there tearing up! 
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    kaliedoscopeyes1kaliedoscopeyes1 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I would make sure that the person you choose is okay with speaking in public.

    Also, you're going to have to do more work to find the written pieces to write your actual ceremony (intro, readings, admonition, ring vows, unity ceremony, blessing, closing). It is a lot of work gathering all of the elements for a ceremony and the good thing about hiring a veteran Officiant is that all the work is done for you.
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