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Can I ask wedding guests to not wear a certain color to the wedding?

So my bride is wearing a red wedding dress and we were debating on wether or not it would be acceptable to include seperate note from the invitation asking guests to not wear red. I have searched far and wide for a simple solution to this to no avail. All I have found was it is unacceptable to ask guests to wear a certain color but not to not wear a certain color...if that makes sense. In the end all I want is my bride to have her perfect day and to stand out in her dress not to be pushy or demanding of my guests who are celebrating our special day. Any advice on the matter would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!

Re: Can I ask wedding guests to not wear a certain color to the wedding?

  • No.  it is considered incredibly rude to tell grown people what to wear in any situation.   Your bride will stand out because she is the bride. Don't tell people what to wear or what not to wear.
  • Your bride will stand out no matter what she's wearing because she's the bride.  There's no polite way to tell guests how to dress.
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  • Agree with the others - no proper, polite way to do this.  It would be rude.
  • Well that's a risk you take when you wear something other than white/ivory.   I would never tell people what color not to wear, but maybe get word around that the bride is wearing red and people can figure it out on their own.  Even in the event a guest wears red, the bride will still stand out.
  • yes , I advise you to tell your guests that your bride will wear red wedding dress and they will know what to do .:) Please don't ask them not to wear the red ,as it's really very rude .
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_can-i-ask-wedding-guests-to-not-wear-a-certain-color-to-the-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:15Discussion:de34f312-9189-4fbf-b11c-3ceb7cf37328Post:c12f95a2-0064-413a-8e12-e6b90b0478fc">Can I ask wedding guests to not wear a certain color to the wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]So my bride is wearing a red wedding dress and we were debating on wether or not it would be acceptable to include seperate note from the invitation asking guests to not wear red. I have searched far and wide for a simple solution to this to no avail. All I have found was it is unacceptable to ask guests to wear a certain color but not to not wear a certain color...if that makes sense. In the end all I want is my bride to have her perfect day and to stand out in her dress not to be pushy or demanding of my guests who are celebrating our special day. Any advice on the matter would be greatly appreciated! Thank you!
    Posted by jsaba03[/QUOTE]

    To answer the question, yes you can ask.  But honestly, it is very rude. Your bride will have her day (perfect, if that's a requirement) no matter what anyone else chooses to wear.  The bride <em>always</em> stands out ... no matter what anyone wears.
  • You answered your own question. It's unacceptable.
     
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_can-i-ask-wedding-guests-to-not-wear-a-certain-color-to-the-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:de34f312-9189-4fbf-b11c-3ceb7cf37328Post:f2ec7d6e-2551-437c-aec8-e6dd9142be76">Re: Can I ask wedding guests to not wear a certain color to the wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>Well that's a risk you take when you wear something other than white/ivory</strong>.   I would never tell people what color not to wear, but maybe get word around that the bride is wearing red and people can figure it out on their own.  Even in the event a guest wears red, the bride will still stand out.
    Posted by Cortney1982[/QUOTE]

    I completely agree with this.
  • I guess you could, but it's very rude
  • If the red dress is not a 'surprise', then casually spreading the word about it with NO mention of guest-clothing restriction may have the desired effect since the idea of not wearing the same color as the bride is pretty widespread for white/ivory.

    At least I would expect it would cut back on the number of people wearing red.  There will possibly still be a few people who don't get the message or miss the point.
  • No, you can't tell people what or what not to wear. Even if someone else shows up in a red dress, everyone will still know who the bride is. I have absolutely no issue with brides wearing a non-white dress, but that is the risk you run by doing so. Most guests know to avoid ivory/white because that is the typical wedding dress color.


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  • I always take notice by the color of the invitations and exclude those colors from my wardrobe, as I assume those are their wedding colors and I don't want to look like a part of their wedding party.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_can-i-ask-wedding-guests-to-not-wear-a-certain-color-to-the-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:de34f312-9189-4fbf-b11c-3ceb7cf37328Post:ba1580de-8914-4bc6-a516-de72a18005b1">Re:Can I ask wedding guests to not wear a certain color to the wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I always take notice by the color of the invitations and exclude those colors from my wardrobe, as I assume those are their wedding colors and I don't want to look like a part of their wedding party.
    Posted by JordynLeighx3[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Me too. I realize nothing I own looks like a BM dress, but I still don't wear those colors. And if the red dress is not a surprise thing I think it's okay to tell people she's wearing a red dress. Just informatively. I wear a lot of red and I'd feel really stupid/embarrassed if I showed up in a red dress, even if it looked nothing like a red bridal dress, and saw the bride in one, so I would appreciate that heads up. </div><div>
    </div><div>I'm not saying tell them not to wear the color, but if I heard bride was in a red dress I wouldn't wear one anyway, same as I would never wear white/ivory/cream to a wedding. </div>
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  • Sure, putting "No red" on the invites will make the bride stand out.  Not for being different and having a red wedding dress though, but for being an incredibly rude bridezilla for dictating what her adult guests shouldn't wear.  So basically, unless that's the message you are going for, don't do it.

    Besides, so what if a few people show up in red?  The bride is still the bride, and she will stick out probably more than usual because she's in a red dress.  People sometimes still wear white to a wedding with a traditional dress and I don't think I've ever heard a single situation wear it ruined the wedding, or the groom mistakenly married the wrong person.
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  • To be honestly, you can't do that. In fact, no matter what clothing your guests wear on your big day, your bride would be the special and stunning one, because it's her day!!
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  • i dont think its rude at all. My original idea was to make everyone attending my wedding to wear shades of blue because its a destination wedding. I was planning on phrasing it as ''guests are encouraged to wear sea tones'' . To me its all in the way you phrase it-- why not suggest colors you would like them in? I wouldnt note it on the invite itself but via the wedding website and word of mouth. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_attire-accessories_can-i-ask-wedding-guests-to-not-wear-a-certain-color-to-the-wedding?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:15Discussion:de34f312-9189-4fbf-b11c-3ceb7cf37328Post:d3af34fc-c741-4466-b767-0b9b624168e8">Re: Can I ask wedding guests to not wear a certain color to the wedding?</a>:
    [QUOTE]i dont think its rude at all. My original idea was to make everyone attending my wedding to wear shades of blue because its a destination wedding. I was planning on phrasing it as ''guests are encouraged to wear sea tones'' . To me its all in the way you phrase it-- why not suggest colors you would like them in? I wouldnt note it on the invite itself but via the wedding website and word of mouth. 
    Posted by ailinjohn[/QUOTE]

    Nope.  It's in the question being asked at all.   Lipstick on a pig is still a pig.
  • i think you can put a note in there and do it the other way round, ask people to wear certain colours as the theme is ???. 
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