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Gift Etiquette

violetstar03violetstar03
First Comment
in Pennsylvania
Hello my NEPA friends! I have a quick question.

When someone RSVP's saying that they can't make it to your wedding (bummer) ... but they send a gift - OBVIOUSLY I send a thank you note right away so they know that I got it.... but.... can I deposit the check that they sent right away, or do I have to wait until after the wedding?

Just wanted to know everyones thoughts. Thanks for the help, I hope everyone is doing fabulously!

xoxo
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Re: Gift Etiquette

  • MissSculleyMissSculley
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I would deposit the check right away (because there is a certainly amount of time you have in order for the bank to accept it, I think its like 2-3 months) and then promptly send a Thank You note.... I wouldnt necessarily USE the money until after the wedding. Maybe you can say that you will put it into the savings and use it on your honeymoon or something.

    Hope this helps!
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  • nic9911nic9911 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_pennsylvania-northeastern_gift-etiquette?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:624Discussion:c4df2678-2015-4401-a9ba-c83f429312adPost:64fdb43a-067e-4bb5-bc37-841d7cbea9a0">Re: Gift Etiquette</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would deposit the check right away (because there is a certainly amount of time you have in order for the bank to accept it, I think its like 2-3 months) and then promptly send a Thank You note.... I wouldnt necessarily USE the money until after the wedding. Maybe you can say that you will put it into the savings and use it on your honeymoon or something. Hope this helps!
    Posted by MissSculley[/QUOTE]

    Ditto. I think that the only problem with using the money prior to is in the event you dont get married you are obligated to give that gift back. Not trying to scare you, but this just happened to a friend of mine and I threw the shower for her. sigh!
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  • violetstar03violetstar03
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Yup, I totally understand the rule of giving it back if for some reason you end up not getting married....but would it be in poor taste to deposit it to help pay for the wedding?
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  • MissSculleyMissSculley
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think you would have to deposit it in order for the check to remain valid- when is your wedding?

    If its a large sum of money and you wouldnt be able to pay it back if (God forbid) something should happen and you dont have the wedding then I wouldnt use it towards the wedding.
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  • violetstar03violetstar03
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I totally see your point. Our wedding is in two months. We pretty much have everything taken care of, but I was just thinking odds and ends.
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  • aatkinson982aatkinson982
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    You SHOULD cash the check so that their checkbook remains in balance.  I would not want to constantly have to remember the $x.xx I gave you and fear forgetting.

    Technically you are not supposed to use the money until you are indeed married.
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