Ugh...what a nightmare. I've been engaged since last February and with my fiance for over 4 years now. We were planning on getting married on July 10, 2010 but clearly can't afford it. We haven't even paid for our rings yet. As of yet, we have NOTHING and will have nothing. We're way to poor. Our wedding date is VERY special as it will be our 5 year anniversary together. We ARE getting married on that day no matter what.
Here's the thing though...our families want a wedding but they pretty much won't and can't help us. The ones that have the money pretty much don't care and the ones that want to help can't afford it. So basically we were planning on just getting married alone and not inviting anyone. I'm very shy and have anxiety about being in front of groups anyhow so that's fine with me. I'm devastated that I won't get my beautiful wedding I've always wanted but this is the card I was dealt. Oh well we can't all be princesses I guess.
So my fiance's mother is insisting we have a wedding shower/bridal shower so we can get gifts... Though I'd like to say "Hell YEAH!" I feel it's kind of wrong to ask people to buy me gifts when we're not even allowing them to see us get married but at the same time, why shouldn't we be allowed gifts? Just because we're not having a wedding doesn't mean we don't deserve gifts. We could clearly use money and/or household items. I'm torn. I have the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other. So basically, I think she's going to do it whether we like it or not, so I think I should at least be able to help. I know she's going to end up doing some tacky hand written note to everyone inviting them so I figure at least I can do something pretty on the computer.
We've also decided that perhaps next year on our one year anniversary we will get re-married in front of everyone and have a reception because we're hoping we can afford it by then. Waiting to really get married is out of the question, we want it on our 5 year anniversary...it's set in stone. So how do I word invitations to a shower and stating there will be no wedding? I was also thinking of just not telling anyone there will be no wedding and just sending announcements that we got married after the wedding with some photos or something and telling everyone we will re-do it next year for all to see plus a reception?
I am open to any suggestions, I'm sure I'm going to get bashed for this but my future mother in law is the devil and at least if I can make it a little less embarrassing I'd love to. Thanks for any help...