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Pennsylvania-Philadelphia

Should I cancel my current reception site and keep looking?

My fiance hates the location of our wedding.  He feels it is to far for his family and I just went with the place because my mom liked it.  My mom already put the deposit down. and our wedding is next July  I am concerned it will cause more problems while planning and he doesn't want to be involved.  He said to do what I want to make me happy that its my day but I feel guilty.. Should I cancel and keep looking before I put another deposit down? 

Re: Should I cancel my current reception site and keep looking?

  • edited December 2011
    You mention your fiances feelings and your moms feelings about the venue... How about YOURS?    Do you love your venue?  If so, thats all that matters.
  • flawlessfayflawlessfay member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I personally feel like it should not be about what your mother likes but what you AND your fiance like. Remember that day is about YOU AND HIM....
    Mrs-Flawless-Pitts
  • edited December 2011
    Agree that you and your FI need to be happy with the decision you make.  Maybe talk to his family about it and hear their thoughts...who knows maybe they would be excited to go to a new place.
  • edited December 2011

    I agree with PP about you and him both liking a place. But if she already put a deposit down, isn't that going to be lost money?

    ~* Diana *~ ~* October 9, 2010 *~

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  • cme144cme144 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I really liike the place and it was within the budget given.. He didn't want to look at places so I made the decision...The places he liked were all too expensive  so I had to decide on one.  I have talked to most of his family and they said it doesn't matter.  We would lose the depost but it may be worth it to make him happier.  Honestly he didn't even want a wedding he just wanted to do JOP so I feel no place will make him happy! 
  • edited December 2011
    Well if he didn't want to look at places then it is his own fault, sorry to say. But it is only one day, people can travel. I have to travel pretty far, almost an hour, to my venue. But that's ok. I hope you can keep the venue. Cancelling will just be lost money.
  • edited December 2011
    If people want to see you both get married, they will travel.  We have people from all over the country coming to our wedding.  I would rather lose money than make my fiance unhappy... but you may be able to have the best of both worlds if you talk it out with him!
  • edited December 2011
    I agree with Tacco. I think the best thing is for you both to be happy. I was thinking of going with one venue but when I took FI he didn't like it so we went with another venue that we both liked and I honestly think it was the best decision. It is both of your wedding day and he should like the place as well. Talk to him and see if you can work it out and look at other venues first before canceling the one you picked.
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  • nancyrnancyr member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Who is paying for the wedding? If your Mom is picking up the whole tab I think he should keep quiet about it and go with the flow, travel for weddings isn't that big a deal, I've flown across the country twice for weddings, and will likely do it again shortly, so driving an hour is no big deal.  Invest in a bus/van to transport them if they don't want to drive.  Whoever is paying should get to have the final say, although I suspect your mom wouldn't have put the deposit down if she thought it was going to be a problem.  Consider how she'll feel if you change it as well.  Admit up front I'm a MOB dealing w/a recalcitrint groom who is VERY happy to spend our money but he and his family aren't paying for any of it so I guess you could say I'm biased.  I want them to have the wedding of their dreams just as long as the dream does not involve me having to file for bankruptcy!  As you get closer to the day of your wedding you will realize that there are a lot of things you could have used that money for if you just throw it away on changing the venue.  JMHO! As I said, am biased!
  • Stacylynn702Stacylynn702 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I think that if he didn't want to look at any, that it's his problem.  If I were you though, I would think about the size of the wedding you're planning.  It sounds to me like your FI is being stubborn.  Wedding planning is a lot of work.  if he's not going to help you, I hope you have either a coordinator or other support somewhere else.  The venue is only the start of the decisions.  Sorry if I sound blunt but I wouldn't be able to handle it if FI wasn't here for me.  Heck, I can barely handle it with him and the support of our families. 

    I lost track, sorry.  I wouldn't worry about travel though.  It's not a big deal at all.  I also wouldn't throw out 1000 bucks to make him happy.  That might not be okay with your mom either.  I think that would be a little offensive.
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