NWR: Birthday wishlists

WildMagelet · January 2012

So, apparently yesterday FSS sent out a mass text stating what he wanted for his birthday. He's turning 9 this year. It read:

"What i want for my birthday is 8 50$ itunes and money"

*headdesk*

I made a comment to myself about getting him a monogrammed toaster instead, but FI who was in the next room didn't get the joke.

Stackeye210 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:5d6ba4a2-fc79-4a46-a80b-543b64df2d68">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]Your 8 year old SS has a cell phone?
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

<div>AND he gets to use it socially, not just for emergencies? </div><div>
</div><div>Interesting. I'll never understand that.</div>

baystateapple · January 2012

Yeah, no. He shouldn't be asking people for presents unless they ask for a wishlist. And holy hell, what on earth does a 9-year-old need a cell phone for? Especially one with texting capabilities?

I like those kid-friendly emergency cell phones where the kids can only call pre-programmed numbers (like Mom and Dad, grandparents) and 911. I wouldn't have a problem giving one of those to my (hypothetical) children if it was necessary.

OliveOilsMom · January 2012

OP, you should get FSS some good old fashioned books for his birthday.

professorscience · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:876f9968-2d2e-4738-b493-8f590995b55c">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]H and I have already had this discussion. <strong>Our future children do not get cells phones until they are in high school. Or maybe even 16.</strong> There is no need for a child to have their own phone. Unless it's one of those Disney phones that only allow three pre-programmed numbers.
Posted by cfaszews25[/QUOTE]

Thankyouthankyouthankyou.

I'm not even opposed to getting a phone for a kid, but FFS teach the kid responsible phone use! I can't tell you the number of times I'm giving instructions for a lab, and am immediately approached by some kid who was just texting her omgbff and missed everything and needs to know what to do.

dumdumfroggie · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:20a03c53-fb18-42c9-abba-4e4d893fde5c">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists : Thankyouthankyouthankyou. I'm not even opposed to getting a phone for a kid, but FFS teach the kid responsible phone use!<strong> I can't tell you the number of times I'm giving instructions for a lab, and am immediately approached by some kid who was just texting her omgbff and missed everything and needs to know what to do.</strong>
Posted by professorscience[/QUOTE]

<div>Do you tell them? I would probably be the mean teacher who would tell them that instructions had already been given.</div>

tpender13 · January 2012

I can see some situations where it makes sense for a younger kid to have a cell phone, like my sister who is a single mom -- her 9- and 11-y-o girls share one, and her 14-y-o son has one. They're all in sports and other extra-curricular activities, and them having phones makes it so much easier for her to co-ordinate where they are, who they're getting rides from, etc.

But you can bet your arse that if they used the phones for something like that, they'd be taken away in a second, and the kids know it.

professorscience · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:bf3154c8-a19d-43bc-8041-fbd78b21481a">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists : Do you tell them? I would probably be the mean teacher who would tell them that instructions had already been given.
Posted by dumdumfroggie[/QUOTE]

Oh, that's me. "I watched you sit back there and play with your phone. I'm not repeating myself because you have now decided it's okay for me to talk to you."

Habs2Hart · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:4e6078a7-1ae0-4cfe-8aa2-a5ad52b79c37">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]I can see some situations where it makes sense for a younger kid to have a cell phone, like my sister who is a single mom -- her 9- and 11-y-o girls share one, and her 14-y-o son has one. They're all in sports and other extra-curricular activities, and them having phones makes it so much easier for her to co-ordinate where they are, who they're getting rides from, etc. But you can bet your arse that if they used the phones for something like that, they'd be taken away in a second, and the kids know it.
Posted by tpender13[/QUOTE]

See, I don't think they need one. My mom was a single mom with 3 kids, and we all had extra carricular activities and my mom didn't even have a cell phone. We all still managed to get picked up because we decided on a time and place before going to those activities.

tpender13 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:c1a2e2b8-8e83-4ca4-a29b-aaad0425d085">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists : See, I don't think they need one. My mom was a single mom with 3 kids, and we all had extra carricular activities and my mom didn't even have a cell phone. We all still managed to get picked up because we decided on a time and place before going to those activities.
Posted by Habs2Hart[/QUOTE]

*shrug* To each his own. FWIW, I didn't have a cell phone until I was in college, when I had my own money to pay for one. I think cell phones are so much more common and cheaper than they were even ten years ago that I don't think it's such a big deal as long as the parents monitor their children's use.

MrsMack10612 · January 2012

I didn't get my first cell phone until I was 27.

One of my coworkers told me the other day that a classmate of his son's got an iPhone - yeah, they're 3rd graders.

chelseamb11 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:75e53c7f-d260-4b8b-b2c8-e47caeeff5d1">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]Gifts are an emergency, Stacks!! It sounds like he has a cell phone and probably some sort of iPod and now he's requesting gifts. <strong>Entitlement</strong> and all that jazz. OP, Did your FI say anything to him about it being rude to request gifts like he did.
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

Yep. That pretty much sums it up!

chelseamb11 · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:20a03c53-fb18-42c9-abba-4e4d893fde5c">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists : Thankyouthankyouthankyou. I'm not even opposed to getting a phone for a kid, but FFS teach the kid responsible phone use! I can't tell you the number of times I'm giving instructions for a lab, and am immediately approached by some kid who was just texting her omgbff and missed everything and needs to know what to do.
Posted by professorscience[/QUOTE]

One of the schools I student taught in didn't allow cell phones rom 7:30-3:00 every day. Kids were good about not using them because if they were caught with them, they got taken away and they couldn't get them back until their parent physically came into shcool and picked it up for them. The other school allowed them ALL DAY (but teachers had the power to veo their usage in class). I can't tell you how many times I had students come into class crying or venting or whatever about what they jsut read on their phone and then they were distracted all class.

jemmini6 · January 2012

OP - your FSS sounds like a spoiled brat. I would take away the cell phone and not get him anything for his birthday until her learned to appreciate the things he has. Well, that may be a little harsh, especially considering it's not his fault that he's entitled, but I'd start reigning that ish in and start limiting his cell phone usage and maybe only get him a $20 gc.

professorscience · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:66bffcd4-b041-4347-a279-a3110035074a">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists : One of the schools I student taught in didn't allow cell phones rom 7:30-3:00 every day. Kids were good about not using them because if they were caught with them, they got taken away and they couldn't get them back until their parent physically came into shcool and picked it up for them. The other school allowed them ALL DAY (but teachers had the power to veo their usage in class). I can't tell you how many times I had students come into class crying or venting or whatever about what they jsut read on their phone and then they were distracted all class.
Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

The school where I student-taught actually made the parents pay a fee if their kid's phone got taken. Apparently they had tried this at the school where I got my first job, but the district wouldn't back the school sup when parents got upset. We've had lots of issues with appropriate and inappropriate use of phones in class. I am all in favor of a kid using the Internet to look something up -- most of the time their phones are faster than our computers. But then kids get so handicapped. Recently I had them working on an assignment over organic compounds, and they were just Googling the questions and either getting REALLY misinformed or just giving up when they couldn't find an answer.

We're not teaching our kids to do research. We're teaching them to accept whatever the Internet tells them at face value and it scares me.

froggatt.clare · January 2012

My mom is a school librarian in Boston and she's had problems with phones. She takes them away and lets the students pick them up when they leave the library. However, a lot of her students are lower-income, and use their phones as a computer - actually writing papers on the phones, and emailing themselves the papers when they're finished.

That being said, she also does a class for the freshman each year about how you can't trust everything on the interwebs. She uses this "Octopus tree" web site all about a fictional plant called the octopus tree. It looks totally legit, but obvi there's no such thing.

TiffannieF · January 2012

My grandma didn't get a cell phone until she was 85 O_o

I kind of agree with the getting a cell phone at a young age *if* they are very involved with extra curricular activities. I did the stats for the basketball team all 4 years in high school...the guys would just leave me there, I was always the last one to be picked up and sometimes it was at midnight when we would get back. Finally I started keeping record of how many times I needed a cell phone for my mom to pick me up then I printed a bunch of reports of girls getting kidnapped while they were waiting for their mom to pick them up....

I was 16 when I finally got it and I didn't have text messaging (well, we didn't have text messaging then, lol) but I was on a limited plan and I was only to use it to call my mom to pick me up.

And yes OP, I think somebody needs to put your FSS in check.

staceycaine · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_nwr-birthday-wishlists?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:3117ef4c-be0d-43cf-a353-2346f1565188Post:5d6ba4a2-fc79-4a46-a80b-543b64df2d68">Re: NWR: Birthday wishlists</a>:
[QUOTE]Your 8 year old SS has a cell phone?
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

My FI's cousin has had an iPhone since he was 4.

WildMagelet · February 2012

Sorry for the P&R, I got distracted reading other boards and then had to go to work.

Yes, FSS has a cp. His sister got one when she was 8 because she was going to extra-curriculars 4 nights per week. But HER phone was one of those where the numbers were pre-programmed by the parents and was an "in case of emergency" type of thing. I dont' think he needs one but his mom is the one paying for it so whatever. Personally, I didn't have one until I could pay for it myself.

Not planning on getting him books, but we were discussing something more outdoorsy than itunes. He told us that he's buying his future sister (his mom is pregnant) an ipod touch so I don't know if that's where his desire for $400 in GC is coming from or not.

FI's had the entitlement conversation with him before when he acted like a brat at one of his grandma's at Christmas. Apparently last time it didn't stick.

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