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I need some honesty...VENT...

BubbalaBubbala
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in Snarky Brides
I love my mother, I really do, but she has no actual idea what it is to throw a wedding.  Small recap: she planned my sister's wedding (who just let her do anything...since my parents were paying)...the photograher fell asleep during the reception...there was scaffolding in the church for renovations...they forgot the wedding rings, and had to go home to get them...my mother allowed her mother to plan her wedding, since her parents were paying...so, she really has no idea what to do...

Like I said, I love my mother, and I truly appreciate all that she is doing for me...without her, and them, I couldn't pay for it on my own...that being said, for my registry, I registered for less expensive things ($5-$30) so that for my bridal shower, people who did not want to, or could not pay for expensive things, could buy less expensive things...however...even with the discussion we had about a budget that we had, that they are willing to spend, she bought $200 worth of the less expensive stuff we registered for...REALLY???  She said it was because she was buying for my grandmother and sisters, who either could not be there, or could not afford it, but REALLY?  Those items were for people that could not afford my stupid Waterford Crystal that I want, and the food processor that is more expensive than I maybe should have registered for...

I feel like a %$*%& talking like this, because I should just be happy for what I am receiving...but, because of what I simply believe is common sense, I just...I am just so freakin annoyed...am I horrible?  I need some honest, truthful advice...
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Re: I need some honesty...VENT...

  • redheadfsuredheadfsu member
    First Comment
    edited January 2010
    Honestly just be happy for what you are receiving. Just add more inexpensive things to the registry. See problem solved.

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  • agk0125agk0125
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-honestyvent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:c746e2d3-6c0c-4cd2-9bbf-09542a87a255Post:f5ac3212-faef-438b-9c9a-c721595c7b87">Re: I need some honesty...VENT...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Honestly just be happy for what you are receiving. Just add more inexpensive things to the registry. See problem solved.
    Posted by redheadfsu[/QUOTE]

    Exactly this.
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  • BubbalaBubbala
    First Comment
    Honestly, I didn't expect her to purchase anything...really, I am grateful for all that I am receiving, I just needed to vent, because she just tends to make decisions, suggestions, or just say things that just make little to no sense to me...like this decision...thanks, girls, I just need to let it go; you're right, I am just being a %^$#@.
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  • FashionFauxPasFashionFauxPas
    First Comment
    I'm with Elise! See if you can exchange some of what was bought for you for things you really want! The store shouldn't give you any qualms about that.
    And you can definitely vent all you want! if I were you, I'd go back and register for some more of the expensive items that you want/need. if people can't afford them, they can buy you cheaper items, gift cards, or join together in a group gift. There's a reason it's called "YOUR day". ;)
    Also, as far as your mom and her wedding planning goes-
    you should respect your mom's advice, and be grateful for her support, but it's still your wedding. If her contribution is used as leverage to do everything her way instead of giving you the day of your dreams, it's not much of a gift.

    When in doubt, hug it out! ;)
    Good luck!
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  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
    First Comment
    edited January 2010
    Be happy for gits,. as they are not required. If she bought off the registry, then its stuff you supposedly want. You don't get to tell her how to spend her money.. EVER.

    So your mother is paying for your wedding AND you want her to buy the most expenxive gifts on the registry? You sound like a greedy brat to me. You should see her contribution to your wedding expenses as an extraordinary gift and be grateful  that you have parents that can contribute.
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  • IzzygrimIzzygrim member
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    Bubbala - I agree, that is annoying that she did that. Like others said, obviously you shouldn't let it bother you. But yes, I admit, that would probably irk me too! Not enough to make me mad, just one of those little things that someone does that wouldn't normally bother you, but after all the other stress of wedding planning, gets more annoying than it normally would. Just try to focus on how thankful you are for her help and try not to let the little stuff bug you.
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  • SarahPLizSarahPLiz member
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_need-honestyvent?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:c746e2d3-6c0c-4cd2-9bbf-09542a87a255Post:632150bf-3103-46da-b8c4-0ea182193202">Re: I need some honesty...VENT...</a>:
    [QUOTE]snarky brides shouldn't be snarking on one another; that's why we turn to this board. no one is ever gonna see it 100% your way, if I've learned nothing else about planning a wedding it's that. vent away sista, vent away.
    Posted by wingqueen26[/QUOTE]

    Since you may not know this, the board used to be Advice from SNarky Brides. So yes, the brides who respond are snarky. The regs ran away when the format changed, but if they were here, there would be no puppies and rainbows.  The posters lately have been whiny, not snarky. Perhaps someone should post a sticky with the definition of snark. This is where its ok to be snarky. Get a clue please.
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  • BubbalaBubbala
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    I posted this on here because I wanted some hard honesty.  I thank you, it makes me feel better than some people agree with me, and some think I am being snotty, as I have been going back and forth it.  Honestly, it took me about 10 minutes to realize how stupid it sounded to be annoyed, but as Izzygrim said, it is just one more thing on a long list of things,including the stress of wedding planning itself, and I got overly annoyed because of it...
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