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Guest list... Etiquette Question

EmilyL113EmilyL113 member
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in Destination Weddings Discussions
Ok ... so when it comes to your single friends, what are you guys doing in regards to "and guests"?  Where do you draw the line there?  I have a decent number of single girlfriends, and if every single one of them brings a guest, that is going to make for a pretty high guest count.  My thing is that a lot of them are good friends with each other and can go together and make a girls trip out of it.  I kinda don't want all of them to just bring random guys just so that they have a date when they can just go together.  That gets so expensive!  Obvi, my girlfriends that have bf's, their bf's will be invited, but I'm talking about the totally single ones.  Is it bad if only put "and guest" to my single gf's going who don't really know many others going??  Thoughts on that??

Thanks for the feedback! :)
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Re: Guest list... Etiquette Question

  • waterous.mwaterous.m
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    We are inviting people without guests if they don't have significant others. We did end up adding a few guests because a few single people did start dating people within the year we got engaged. We did make two exceptions however. We invited FIs sister with an 'and guest' because she is his sister and is also a BM, and also one of my single GF is invited 'and guest' because she will literally not know anyone else so I thought it would be nice for her to have someone to hang out with. 

    I think its fine to invite people without a date if they know other people, but keep a few extra spaces for people who get serious BF/GF in the next year:)

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  • sld0618sld0618 member
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    I had the same thing going on for AHR.  FI and I decided that we were going to cut our lists down and give them a guest option.  Some of them aren't even using it, but it was a nice gesture.  Almost every single person said they've never been to a wedding where they were allowed to bring someone.  Talk to them one on one and see what they have to say.  I highly doubt that if this is for the DW that they're going to find a date for it.  That would be a little awkward.  If I were single going to a DW, I would just go with friends.
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  • aukellyaukelly
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    We invited everyone with a guest. I wouldn't expect our single friends to travel alone. I do understand the cost aspect but you also have to remember that just because people day they are coming doesn't mean they will. All of our friends were super excited until it got closer. I would say you will have to have a clear line with the and guest meaning anyone not in a relationship when invites get sent don't get a guest but people aren't going to be happy.

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  • Nicky47846Nicky47846 member
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    On my side all single friends had guests, on FI side only ones with significant others and groomsman had and guest.  We did this because my list was so small, his was so large that was the only way to cut back on guests.  No one has said anything negative about it, and are still very excited to go, even if rooming with a mutual friend or someone they do not really know..
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  • chosen175chosen175 member
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    Honestly, if they're all friends with each other you're going to have some very ticked off wedding guests if some get to bring a date and others don't.  They'll talk amongst themselves and word will get out that some got a +1 and others didn't.  Then they'll start talking about YOU.  So you need to either be prepared to put out a lot of fires or you'll have to give everyone a +1 and just hope they don't show (if the budget is your concern.) 

    PP is right - nobody is going to want to travel alone.  Even if I were to fly down with a friend of mine and her boyfriend, I'd feel like a total 3rd wheel.  I wouldn't want to join them on every single outing they took, but at the same time I wouldn't want to explore a strange place by myself because I wouldn't feel safe walking around alone.  To be honest, if I were invited to a DW without a date, I wouldn't go.

    Good luck - it's not an easy decision to make!
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  • AKWinterBrideAKWinterBride member
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    Unless they are in a committed relationship, I didn't give our single guests a '+1'.  It's our wedding, not a random night at the bar and I just didn't want a bunch of strange guys hanging around. 
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  • reginasm11reginasm11 member
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    I have a lot of single girlfriends too... they are going to pair up and go together and have a fun girls time!
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