Connecticut

2 Questions about BM dresses

1. How far in advance should we order them?

2. I have my eye on a dress that is about $200. I'm afraid some of my BMs will think that's a bit steep...but I've been told that $200 is normal for a BM dress these days. I know everyone has a different price range..but I figured I would get a general consensus from you guys - do you think it's rude to select a BM dress that costs $200? Or is that cheap? I don't know what to think! (I wish I could contribute to the cost of their dresses but I just can't!)

TIA!
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Re: 2 Questions about BM dresses

  • Mona8Mona8 member
    First Anniversary Name Dropper Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    1. Two of my BMs ordered their dresses at the end of June and and the other 2 just ordered them, so that's 10-11 months in advance. The consultant said it would take the dresses about 4 months to get in, so I think you'd be safe ordering them 6-8 months early. Most of BMs go away for grad school so I wanted to get them all ordered by the end of the summer when they were in the area- plus I prefer to do things on the early side, lol.

    2. The BM dress I chose ended up being just over $200 with tax. All of the dresses I liked were $160-200 so I asked my BMs if they were comfortable with that range and none of them had a problem with it (I also couldn't afford to pay for them, as much as I wish I could).  The shop I went to also has a cap on how much they'll charge for alterations so my girls know what the very max they'll pay is and they can plan ahead.  I think most girls will expect to spend about $200 on their dresses, but I would go ahead and find out what your BMs are comfortable with.

    HTH!
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  • edited December 2011
    I am planning on going with my girls to order their dresses in October for my August wedding, so about 9 months out...

    In regards to pricing, I'm in the same boat.  I found a dress I really like, but its $200.  My sister says its ok, but I'm not sure about the other girls, so I plan on looking at a few other dresses just in case.  However, the shop where we will most likely get their dresses offers free alterations, so that helps too.

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  • megbrooks2011megbrooks2011 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We ordered in October for my June wedding.  So 8 months in advance.

    I originally wanted J.Crew ones that were on sale so they would have been under $200,  but we had some sizing issues with one of the girls so we had to start the search over and with three of the BMs being potentially pregnant we had to pick a dress that would make a maternity version.  So we ended up with dresses that cost the girls $267.  Which is alot but the last two weddings I've been that's what I paid.  And the other four weddings the dresses have been around $200.  I've never paid anything less than $190 for a BM dress and I 've been in 6 weddings.

    I did pay for their shoes and jewelry (not part of their gift) and also paid the tip for hair and make up which was optional.  And they didn't have to pay for my shower and they all went in on one gift for me.  So costs other then the dress were controlled during the process.
  • edited December 2011
    As Mona8 said, the first thing you should do is talk to them.  Be honest, ask them what they can afford (including alterations).  If someone says they absolutely can't spend over $150, then do your best to find something less expensive.  Hopefully they will be honest with you, and if they are fine with spending $200 then you are good to go.

    What is expensive to some people isn't to others, so I'm not sure if it helps to know what anyone else spent.  All you can do is try your hardest to accomodate your girls, and not pick out a super expensive dress they all hate :) It sounds like you are taking their opinions into account, so you should be in good shape!

    Oh, and most "bridesmaid" dresses (from wedding dress stores, etc.) are probably in the $150+ range, but there is always the possibility of getting dresses from a department store or non-wedding dress shop, which might be less.  So there are options out there.  Just FYI, not to say that your choice is not a great one.
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  • TBee99TBee99 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are hoping to order BM dresses by end of August, which is a year out, but I'm trying to coordinate with girls in three states!

    The dress we like is just over $200. What I did with my BMs was take them to Mariella's first. Then we went to David's Bridal and Alfred Angelo and they saw the difference in quality of the dresses. After that, they realize they didn't mind paying a bit more for a nicer product.
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  • megbrooks2011megbrooks2011 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_connecticut_2-questions-bm-dresses?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local Wedding BoardsForum:65Discussion:edcfdd62-ed60-4064-aa48-338fafa07de8Post:14acaf41-523f-4a80-af5d-e9d7612aa630">Re: 2 Questions about BM dresses</a>:
    [QUOTE]As Mona8 said, the first thing you should do is talk to them.  Be honest, ask them what they can afford (including alterations).  Posted by dannie134[/QUOTE]

    Yes this.  I should have said that I also spoke to each BM individually to find out their budget and when we found a dress I asked if they were okay with it. One of the BM the dress was out of budget and I paid for the difference.

    But good advice from Dannie.
  • edited December 2011
    Our dresses come to about $256 with a special of 5% off. Most of the dresses that I have liked were around the same price or more. I do feel bad because I feel like it is a steep price for a dress however, I have paid similar. Like a PP, I will be paying for their jewelry and they can wear whatever gold shoes they already have.
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  • banana468banana468 member
    First Answer First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We ordered about 5 mo in advance.

    But ditto PPs.  Please ask their budget before choosing a dress.  You really should supplement the cost if you pick something that is out of their budgets.

    And it's fine to give them jewelry to wear at the wedding but please don't make that their gift.  If it carries any conditions then it's never a gift.
  • edited December 2011
    Thank you all for your help! As always, you ladies have given me some great advice :) I've spoken with my 2 MOHs about the budget, and one of my BMs. I have 3 other BMs who are out of state, so I need to have some conversations with them about budget, and then I will be deciding whether I should go with the $200 dress. Thanks again!
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