My fiance and I have been together for 3 1/2 years, living together for almost 3 years. We are both pretty low-key people - neither of us particularly likes the idea of a "traditional" wedding and we thought very seriously of eloping. However, we finally decided we would probably regret not having our families with us and we are having a fairly small outdoor wedding at my parents' farm, with just family and a few close friends. He is my best friend and so when it came time to look for a wedding dress, I really didn't even consider him not helping to pick it out. A few of his family members (and certainly some people at the bridal salons we went to...) were a bit surprised by this - given the whole tradition/superstition of the groom not seeing the wedding dress until the day-of. However, we found out this weekend that his Catholic paternal grandmother is almost livid that my fiance saw and helped pick out my dress. She told my futher mother-in-law that she is "very upset" and she even went so far as to ask, "Is it too late for her to get a different dress?" I paid for my own dress, I like it, and I have no intention of getting a different one! I don't believe in the superstition and we've been living together for years, so I had no idea it would be such a big deal. My question is: What should we say to his grandmother (and the few other family members who bring it up)? I don't want to insult them, but it's a bit hurtful to hear them hint that our marriage might not work out as a result of this...
