Worst wedding party qifts ever?

SJM7538 · April 2013

So... I'm at work and I'm having a conversation with a co-worker about the wedding and she asks me what I'm getting my girls for gifts. She seemed floored when I told her that I didn't know yet and each girl would be getting something different and not related to the wedding. Apparently she was in a wedding a few years back and the bride got her and all the other BMs gym memberships.

This got me thinking - What is the worst gift you've ever received as a bridesmaid?

I've been in 5 weddings in the past 6 or 7 years and literally every single wedding my gift has been jewelry to wear in the wedding... and crappy jewelry at that with the exception of one. I have one friend who bought us jewelry, but it was nice elegant jewelry from her uncle's jewelry shop. And I still wear it to this day... It's a matching necklace and bracelet and I wear it to any function I need to get dressed up for.

One friend actually held a jewelry party (ya know like Lia Sophia) and used her credits to buy all the BMs matching necklaces. I was MOH so I recieved the matching earrings as well. I couldn't tell you to this day where it is or if I still even have it.

So let's hear it - what were the worst gifts you ever recieved.

MayDay513 · April 2013

I think what makes a bad wedding party gift, is when it's not an actual gift. The bride in the wedding I was in threw(and by threw I mean tossed across the room) me a mailing package (envelope with bubble wrap on the inside) that was opened that contained jewelry she wanted all of us to wear for her wedding, she said it was my Christmas present. Then she bought us all bathrobes, to wear and just handed them to us in the little plastic shipping bags while we were getting ready for bachelorette party. They were nice, but it wasn't well thought out.

SJM7538 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:a2fa65f3-86a1-48fe-8eaf-767a3f6075c4">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>I think what makes a bad wedding party gift, is when it's not an actual gift</strong>. The bride in the wedding I was in threw(and by threw I mean tossed across the room) me a mailing package (envelope with bubble wrap on the inside) that was opened that contained jewelry she wanted all of us to wear for her wedding, she said it was my Christmas present. Then she bought us all bathrobes, to wear and just handed them to us in the little plastic shipping bags while we were getting ready for bachelorette party. They were nice, but it wasn't well thought out.
Posted by huynhette[/QUOTE]

I completely agree. While yes it was jewelry, my friend that got us the nice jewelry actually put thought and effort into it. Which was nice. It really is beautiful. The Lia Sophia stuff I received was only bought because it matched our dresses.

Maybe it sounds petty but I felt really unappreciated in that wedding. I put a lot of time, effort money and planning into making sure the bride got everything she wanted.

AddieCake · April 2013

My worst gift was about 15 years ago. It was a matching set of bracelet and earrings to wear for the wedding. At the time, I didn't know it was a crappy gift, but I did feel that the jewelry, which was gold with creamy yellow plastic beads, didn't really match the dresses, which were cranberry, so I wondered why we were given THAT as jewelry.

KatWAG · April 2013

There was a thread last week where the bride wanted to give each BM a "bridal emergency kit" including, but not limited to: tampons, nail files, tissues, mints, stain removers, clear nail polish, bobby pins, etc

SJM7538 · April 2013

Addie that sounds like something I would have played dress up with out of my grandmother's jewelry box when I was 5.

itzMS · April 2013

I also got a monogramed bathrobe. I mean, I use it, but it was really, really random.

The other was a cheapie silver clutch type purse with some kleenex, a tube of lotion, and a chapstick.

I've always said I'd rather have no gift than a generic cheapo gift that a budget conscious bride stretched to purchase. I'd always be thrilled with a heartfelt note, or simply a hug and a "thank you".

gmcr78 · April 2013

My worst one was jewelry to wear in the wedding. It was a crappy plastic beaded thing with an "invisible" chain-i.e. fishing line, and matching earrings. Something I would have never worn on my own, totally cheap, and cheap-looking. She gave it to us in a tiny engraved jewelry box that I think I threw out some years later. At least she put my name on that, and not her wedding date. I still didn't care for it though.

MuppetFan · April 2013

For my first wedding, I got my MOH (my only attendant) an ipod.

When I was in her wedding, she got me a pair of earrings to wear for her wedding. She also said she was paying to have my hair done. I was like ok... kinda crappy but I didn't need a gift.

On her wedding day, she told me that she wasn't paying for our hair to be done afterall. I said ok, I'll do my own. However, apparently that wasn't acceptable because she had already told the hair person that she was doing my hair (hair person was miffed that she agreed to come to the hotel and was only doing 2 people already). $60. Um... I didn't even have that much cash on me or a checkbook. Eventually she said she would pay for me. Ok...

My mom works in the industry and she thought it was customary for jewelry to be the gift.

libby2483 · April 2013

I've only been a BM once, and I got a Coach wristlet, so I guess I've been lucky! I agree that the worst WP gifts are ones that aren't really gifts because they are supposed to be used for the wedding.

MuppetFan · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:e325f5e9-72b5-4427-b38d-18edb5ea3e3d">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]I also got a monogramed bathrobe. I mean, I use it, but it was really, really random. The other was a cheapie silver clutch type purse with some kleenex, a tube of lotion, and a chapstick. I've always said I'd rather have no gift than a generic cheapo gift that a budget conscious bride stretched to purchase<strong>. I'd always be thrilled with a heartfelt note, or simply a hug and a "thank you".</strong>
Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]

I did a LOT for my best friend during her wedding. She's bipolar and she was having episodes left and right and I was holding a lot of things together for her. She was really nasty to me on several occassions. A simple note or thank you would've meant the world to me

aRachel21 · April 2013

I never got a gift for being a bridesmaid

Apparently the bride was making jewelry for us to wear for the wedding but she never finished in time.

TKzilla · April 2013

The last wedding I was in, the bride gave me a pair of flip flops to wear in her wedding. Cheap, white flip flops with a big white flower on them. This, after I was made to buy a tangerine orange dress that I will never wear again. This, after FI and I spent a couple hundred dollars to fly to another time zone. All the bridesmaids got the same thing. I also never received a thank you note for her wedding present.

She is the MOH in my wedding. Love her to death. Just still miffed about that whole ordeal.

[Deleted User] · April 2013

For my aunt's wedding she gave thd BMs a necklace made of ribbon that matched the dresses and a pearl. I have no idea where it is now. For my bestie's wedding last May she gave us a monogrammed tote bag and a Build-A-Bear with dresses made out of the leftover fabric of our dresses. She also purchased us matching shawls for the wedding. For my wedding I'm planning on writing personal thank you cards to my side and probably a gift card of their liking.

MuppetFan · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:1672a9ac-4460-45dd-aa02-f0882d20b126">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]The last wedding I was in, the bride gave me a pair of flip flops to wear in her wedding. Cheap, white flip flops with a big white flower on them. This, after I was made to buy a tangerine orange dress that I will never wear again. This, after FI and I spent a couple hundred dollars to fly to another time zone. All the bridesmaids got the same thing. I also never received a thank you note for her wedding present. She is the MOH in my wedding. Love her to death. Just still miffed about that whole ordeal.
Posted by CourtaniaLynn[/QUOTE]

Are flip flops included in your gift for her? hehe

teachmegs1 · April 2013

Okay! I'll take the opportunity to ask this question in this thread versus starting another one of these.

I plan on giving my girls a "Day of kit" with stuff that they may need/want throughout the day and matching flip flops to wear at the reception. Our honeymoon is in Disney the week after. All of my girls are into Disney something. Whether it's Disney Princess', Mickey or Minney, ect. Is is acceptable to give them these "Day of" gifts and then get them something on our Honeymoon? Do you think I should let them all know that this is the intention. I by no means have intentions of giving them these day of things and that's it. I know from reading plenty of threads and responses from here that it's not personal, nor thoughtful to do this for someone in your bridal party.

MuppetFan · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:201af949-a700-474c-84de-ea96031ad345">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]Okay! I'll take the opportunity to ask this question in this thread versus starting another one of these. I plan on giving my girls a "Day of kit" with stuff that they may need/want throughout the day and matching flip flops to wear at the reception. Our honeymoon is in Disney the week after. All of my girls are into Disney something. Whether it's Disney Princess', Mickey or Minney, ect. Is is acceptable to give them these "Day of" gifts and then get them something on our Honeymoon? Do you think I should let them all know that this is the intention. I by no means have intentions of giving them these day of things and that's it. I know from reading plenty of threads and responses from here that it's not personal, nor thoughtful to do this for someone in your bridal party.
Posted by teachmegs1[/QUOTE]

I would be delighted by a Disney gift hand picked for me from your honeymoon. You might want to mention that something else is coming

itzMS · April 2013

Please don't do day of kits. No adult woman needs a day of kit or a pair of cheapie flip flops. ETA: Why does the gift have to come from Disney? Just buy them something from the Disney Store. Isn't it the same merch?

jackiebrim · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:c8de3869-c0a6-408e-be81-836892015390">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]If someone gave me anything with feminine hygiene products in it I would immediately hand it back and decline to accept it. I would tell them why. Don't care that it's their wedding day. That's offensive to me. VERY offensive. I would never wear flip-flops at a wedding reception. It's tacky. Worst gift: During the 80s there was a fad in my town of having bridesmaids carry satin-covered bibles with trailing ribbons instead of bouquets. Those were often the "bridesmaid's gift" aka the "bridesmaid's favor." This always burned my butt like a flame from hell because this was a churchy town. ALL OF US OWNED A BIBLE ALREADY!!! I took a stack of New Testaments a foot high to the Salvation Army donation box several years later.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

<div>I actully think the "day-of kit" is a great idea. Many absent-minded people, especially around the time of a wedding, are going to forget the essentials. It would be nice to have those items provided. Even if I didn't need to use any of it that day, I would have a ready-made kit to carry around! I don't think that's offensive at all. I think it's thoughtful. Not as a gift, though. Just as an extra gesture. </div><div>
</div><div>So far, I have only purchased my girls' shoes and monogrammed bags. I know, tacky, but they're beach bags, and who can have enough beach bags? I am going to fill the bags with items personalized to each maid. I hate when brides give generic gifts to everyone; these girls are supposed to be your closest friends, so you should know them well enough to get them something they'll like!</div><div>
</div><div>Oh, and I'm also writing each a nice note on why she is important to me.</div>

MobKaz · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:c8de3869-c0a6-408e-be81-836892015390">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]If someone gave me anything with feminine hygiene products in it I would immediately hand it back and decline to accept it. I would tell them why. Don't care that it's their wedding day. That's offensive to me. VERY offensive.<strong> I would never wear flip-flops at a wedding reception. It's tacky. </strong>Worst gift: During the 80s there was a fad in my town of having bridesmaids carry satin-covered bibles with trailing ribbons instead of bouquets. Those were often the "bridesmaid's gift" aka the "bridesmaid's favor." This always burned my butt like a flame from hell because this was a churchy town. ALL OF US OWNED A BIBLE ALREADY!!! I took a stack of New Testaments a foot high to the Salvation Army donation box several years later.
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>And yet....bare footed works for you??</div><div>
</div><div>"<span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ffffff;">Oh, then boots will look fine there! My wedding was much the same. I wore a wedding gown and he wore silk pants and shirt, but <strong>everybody was barefoot</strong>, and all the guests were in shorts and jeans. <strong> We sent out invitations</strong> on stationery inviting everyone to "a backyard barbecue in celebration of our marriage" with "<strong>shoes optional</strong>" at the bottom. It was a party rather than a "wedding."........Retread/RE: Bridesmaids: dresses and cowboy boots</span><h1 style="background-color:#edf4dd;border:0px;font-size:18px;margin:0px;outline:0px;padding:5px 0px 0px;vertical-align:baseline;line-height:normal;font-family:Arial;">
</h1><div>I also thought that unless it was a black tie affair, one should <em>never </em>dictate/indicate attire on invitations.</div>
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Simply Fated · April 2013

Jewelry that was mandatory to wear for the wedding. This includes earrings. My ears weren't pierced. I was expected to wear them anyway.

MuppetFan · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:71174a9a-68c4-4b8e-b27d-c87141b281a3">Re:Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]Please don't do day of kits. No adult woman needs a day of kit or a pair of cheapie flip flops. ETA: Why does the gift have to come from Disney? Just buy them something from the Disney Store. <strong>Isn't it the same merch?</strong>
Posted by itzMS[/QUOTE]

Not at all.

MuppetFan · April 2013

I don't find the kits offensive...but I always thought the things to put in a kit were more for the bathroom basket. Hotels normally keep some things around too. It's certainly not something I want as a present.

I don't really have any beach bags. If I got one, I'd use it to carry my groceries. I like bags for that. I think it's fine as a gift bag.

beckygopop · April 2013

Im going to be the CoMOH in a wedding in Sept. The bride was sharing details of the wedding and how the bouquets were going to be paper flowers made by this local company. They really are pretty and then she describes our bouquets and then she says 'and these will be your BM gift!' So thats what I will be getting.

MuppetFan · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:dec29ed3-9253-4bec-a0b8-a26ab3750515">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]mobkaz, my wedding was not formal....and it wasn't really a "wedding." It was a backyard barbecue that happened to have a hitching ceremony happen at the same time. We didn't want a formal affair. That is so not, and we couldn't afford it. Our "invitations" were on stationery, run off on a printer, that said (quote) "Please join us for a backyard barbecue in celebration of our marriage on date and time at address! Shoes optional! Does that sound like a formal event to you? That's a party invitation. You should not, however, wear flip-flops if you have a formal wedding and reception with formal invitations and attire. It IS tacky. <strong>You're doggone right I'd refuse to accept tampons as a gift. </strong>I'd hand them back and say, "No, thank you. You can keep this."
Posted by RetreadBride[/QUOTE]

LOL. I wouldn't hand it back but I'd be analyzing the gift and trying to figure out why someone thought this was a worthwhile investment. I don't use tampons...but if I had my period, I'd be aware of it and would come prepared.

KeptInStitches · April 2013

Okay, for this to make sense, you need to know that my ear piercings are really super-super tiny.

The bride for the wedding I was in made us all jewelry. But she put the earrings on larger gauge posts than I'm used to. They weren't like super-big or anything, just bigger than my holes. We got the jewelry the night before the wedding, and there was no way I was going to be able to fix this. Fortunately my stylist, who was a close friend of my family, was willing to ... make them fit through my holes. Yeah. Not pleasant.

MuppetFan · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:4827ec0d-b2d4-474a-91e1-e89d7566bef3">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]Okay, for this to make sense, you need to know that my ear piercings are really super-super tiny. The bride for the wedding I was in made us all jewelry. But she put the earrings on larger gauge posts than I'm used to. They weren't like super-big or anything, just bigger than my holes. We got the jewelry the night before the wedding, and there was no way I was going to be able to fix this. Fortunately my stylist, who was a close friend of my family, was willing to ... make them fit through my holes. Yeah. Not pleasant.
Posted by KeptInStitches[/QUOTE]

Ow.

NYCBride2013 · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:cbdf51ae-9ba5-4cfd-9609-01fec5a5db14">Re:Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]Im going to be the CoMOH in a wedding in Sept. The bride was sharing details of the wedding and how the bouquets were going to be paper flowers made by this local company. They really are pretty and then she describes our bouquets and then she says 'and these will be your BM gift!' So thats what I will be getting.
Posted by beckygopop[/QUOTE]

OMG- that is really terrible!

wittykitty14 · April 2013

I've never been in a wedding and still don't know what I'm getting my WP. But from reading what's on the boards, it seems like the worst gifts are ones that are for the wedding or are wedding-related. It goes back to what I've heard you all say-buy for them like it was their birthday!

Fancypantsamy · April 2013

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_worst-wedding-party-qifts-ever?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:a4b53a5d-58dc-407d-948b-eecb5abfbc5bPost:91653f85-d6af-4e53-a33d-238a497f7217">Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Worst wedding party qifts ever? : And yet....bare footed works for you?? " Oh, then boots will look fine there! My wedding was much the same. I wore a wedding gown and he wore silk pants and shirt, but everybody was barefoot , and all the guests were in shorts and jeans. We sent out invitations on stationery inviting everyone to "a backyard barbecue in celebration of our marriage" with " shoes optional " at the bottom. It was a party rather than a "wedding."........Retread/RE: Bridesmaids: dresses and cowboy boots I also thought that unless it was a black tie affair, one should never dictate/indicate attire on invitations.
Posted by mobkaz[/QUOTE]

<div>I don't think Retread did anything wrong by making shoes optional. The problem I have with people dictating a dress code is usually it implies that you don't know how to dress for a fancy event/you need to go spend a lot of money buying formal wear or matching a color scheme or something dumb. Retread was just stating that if people don't want to wear shoes, they don't have to. </div><div>
</div><div>I find it really weird mobkaz went and dug up some comment from a different post to attack Retread with. Weird and uncomfortable. </div><div>
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</div>

beckygopop · April 2013

I know! Just one of the many things she is doing that Im just biting my tongue over. I tried to give her advice on things, ettiquewise but shes not listening. I might not have a tongue left by the end of this wedding.

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