African American Weddings

Need advice about MOH issue...

I don't want to make it too lengthy, but here's the rundown:

I asked my BFF (we've known each other for over 20 years)to be my MOH in Novemeber 2011 when I got engaged. She started acting really funny after a few months (i.e. refusing to go dress shopping and not replying on BM e-mails), but I had always believed she was here to support me although she dislikes my FI. At the end of January, we had a "falling out" after she had confessed to not really wanting to be involved because she couldn't support me marrying my FI. I was extremely hurt after being strung along for over a year and was in tears....

Since then, I've replaced her in the wedding party. After not talking for 2 months, we've had a couple of phone conversations, but there hasn't been any resolution/discussion about the disagreement. I get married on August 10th, and will be sending out invitations within the next week. I know it's a little early (based on etiquette), but FI has a lot of family out of state and we want to give more than enough notice. Should I invite my replaced MOH to my wedding? Her sister's boyfriend has become friends with my FI, so if we invite him, we'll technically be inviting her sister too. Should we invite her sister and her boyfriend to the wedding? Any other suggestions? Thanks for your help!

Re: Need advice about MOH issue...

  • First I'm no etiquette queen this is just my opinion .. Lol I'm thinking even though you guys had a Falling out if it is in your budget and you would feel comfortable with her attending extend an invite to the exmoh. She might not even want to come but at least you offered and she declined. And that way you do not look like you are trying to be rude and purposely not invite her but invited her sister. But like a lot of the ladies told me its your and your FI day so you have to do what you feel is best. I hope that helped

    Daisypath - (PNE7)
  • I say invite her and give her the option of declining if she wants.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to Re:Need advice about MOH issue...:[QUOTE]I say invite her and give her the option of declining if she wants. Posted by nbrown501[/QUOTE]This right here. Don't give her the satisfaction of saying she wasn't invited.
    Mrs. Mosley 2 be
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_need-advice-about-moh-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:0fc02d8a-6551-40fd-a170-8e094db25aeePost:e092919a-112f-4c03-9b24-17fcddd43644">Re: Need advice about MOH issue...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I say invite her and give her the option of declining if she wants.
    Posted by nbrown501[/QUOTE]



    Definitely this....

    Lilypie - H1jI


    Daisypath - MFL5



  • I say invite her, leave it up to her to decide whether or not she wants to attend. I think you should also mentally prepare yourself for the chance that she may decline. Personally, I think that it may be a bit difficult for me to maintain a friendship with someone that doesn't "support" my marriage. Isn't marriage all about the blending of families and friendships? I'm not suggesting that they have to be bff's, but I think get-togethers are going to be fairly difficult if your hubby and bff can't at least be civil towards each other. She needs to get over herself.

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