For those already living with partner...

Re: For those already living with partner...

• aurianna member

  

  July 2013 edited July 2013

  I'd avoid a honeymoon registry. They're really kind of a scam. The company makes it look like people are buying you excursions and massages and dinners and such, but really, the company ends up just giving you a check worth what all your guests donated, MINUS the company's cut. So essentially the company lies to your guests and profits off of it, and you also end up getting of less monetary value than if your guests had just given you cash or physical gifts on their own. Also, because of the nature of it, it comes dangerously close to asking your guests directly for money, which is rude.
  
  Even though you live together, I'm sure there are still things you could upgrade. Nicer towels. Nicer linens. High end silver wear, pots and pans that will last forever. Items for a guest room. Etc. Also, while some might side-eye it, I think registering for gardening stuff, camping stuff, maybe a few hosting/entertainment items like some party/lawn games, etc isn't an awful way to round out a small registry.
  I don't know if anyone has offered to throw you a shower or not, but you should only accept one if you are welcoming physical gifts, as a purpose of a shower is to "shower the bride with gifts." This may or may not be relevant to your situation, but I thought I'd mention it in case anyone had offered and you were excited about it.
  
  Now, if you reeeeeally don't want anymore stuff, this is what I'd suggest:
  Don't register at all.
  Say something offhand to your bridal party, "Oh, just in case anyone happens asks you about gifts feel free to let them know we're actually saving for our honeymoon."
  Maybe mention it to a close family member too (a mom, an aunt you're close to, etc). Every family has a blabbermouth. If word gets to blabbermouth that you're saving money towards your honeymoon, plenty of others will find out.
  If anyone asks you directly if you're registered or what you need, you can say, "Actually we're all set in our home, though we are saving for our honeymoon."
  And again, politely decline any showers anyone may offer.
  
  By not registering and by telling anyone that happens to ask that you're saving for something, most people will get the idea that you want money. There may be a few people who want to give you a physical present instead, but just accept those graciously (odds are those same people wouldn't donate to a honeyfund either).
  
  So that's my suggestion. Either register for some upgrades to freshen up the house, or don't register at all. You know your situation best and which will work better for you.
  
  Gratz on your upcoming wedding!
  

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