Thank You Notes... How did you do it?

bullfrogmama · September 2013

So I'm starting on my thank you notes... Did you all send them as you completed them or all at once? So many of my invitations got lost in the USPS system when I sent them in bulk that I kind of just want to send them as I complete them. But would it be rude for some people to get theirs earlier than others? What do you think?

KeptInStitches · September 2013

Depends. What's more convenient? In my area, it's more convenient to show up at the post office with a huge stack of mail to handle, but mailboxes are small around here and they're not in convenient spots. Etiquette-wise, I don't think it's rude if some people get notes a day or two before others. The USPS could have made that happen as easily as you.

photokitty · September 2013

I sent them as I finished them, I didn't wait and send them all at once. I started with the checks so that people weren't waiting on them to be cashed, wrote those mailed them and cashed the checks a few days later.

southernbelle0915 · September 2013

I sent as I went.

Maggie0829 · September 2013

I really don't remember what I did but I don't think it matters which way you decide to do it.

MayDay513 · September 2013

I got on ours the night of each shower (2 bridal showers, one couple shower, and some people even brought gifts to bachelorette) , and the minute we got any wedding gifts. So every night after the parties I would start writing. 20-30 thank you cards goes by pretty quick if you have your favorite rom com on. It also helped us remember everything people gave us. I always had someone (my sister) take notes for me at the showers. The wedding thank yous were finished within the first week we were back from our honeymoon. I wrote them all by myself. DH didn't need to help me.

I don't think people compare notes about thank you cards, or when they get them so if its a couple days later it's ok. Every time I would finish a batch I would just throw them in the post office box. I don't think many if any got lost.

bullfrogmama · September 2013

Awesome. That's what I'll do then. My issue is I can only work on them after 9PM, because I've got 2 small monsters (children, lol) who want nothing to do with me unless I sit down to get something done. Once they're in bed, I clean up the house, then I can finally sit down and do something non-mom related.

My goal is 15/night, here's hoping!

MuppetOverlord · September 2013

I went to a wedding in December. The bride told me 3 months ago she's halfway done her thank you notes but wanted to wait till they were all done to send them out.

I spent about 20 hours working on their gift, which was individual nintendo cupcake toppers made out of fondant, each one cut by hand.

Still.....no thank you note.

I'd sit down for a few nights ASAP and write them all and send them all out, but if you can't do that, send them as you go. At least some people won't be waiting.

I'm just going to do all of mine on the plane to our HM and back.

Maggie0829 · September 2013

bullfrogmama said:

Awesome. That's what I'll do then. My issue is I can only work on them after 9PM, because I've got 2 small monsters (children, lol) who want nothing to do with me unless I sit down to get something done. Once they're in bed, I clean up the house, then I can finally sit down and do something non-mom related. My goal is 15/night, here's hoping!

What about your H? Can't he help to get them done as well? That way you aren't stuck writing 15 a night because 15 in one sitting is a lot on your hand, especially if you aren't used to writing without the help of a keyboard.

MuppetOverlord · September 2013

My uncle wrote all the ones to his family for his wedding.

I appreciated that. I'll probably write them all for our wedding, but more because I know if I do them myself, they will be done immediately.

LDubHawksFan · September 2013

MuppetOverlord said:
I went to a wedding in December. The bride told me 3 months ago she's halfway done her thank you notes but wanted to wait till they were all done to send them out.

I spent about 20 hours working on their gift, which was individual nintendo cupcake toppers made out of fondant, each one cut by hand.

Still.....no thank you note.

I'd sit down for a few nights ASAP and write them all and send them all out, but if you can't do that, send them as you go. At least some people won't be waiting.

I'm just going to do all of mine on the plane to our HM and back.

Same here! I wanted to just shake her and say to send them out already!! It looks worse to the whole group if you are tardy with thank yous. She could have saved face with a lot of guests by sending then out as she goes, but now all of us are probably side eyeing the couple because it's been 10 months and no TY. Op, I realize you are not this late but I think it's better just to send as you go. It's doubtful that guests will talk about if they got their thank yous to one another.

Maggie0829 · September 2013

Just a quick story. H and I went to a wedding in November 2011. We received our thank you note for their wedding exactly one year to the day of their wedding anniversary (Nov 2012). By that point I was kind of pissed that we had not received a thank you note. When I did finally receive it I just laughed at how long it took them to send them out, but did nothing to make up for the fact that it took her 1 whole year to send out maybe 60-70 thank you notes. That length of time is just ridiculous.

arrippa · September 2013

Maggie0829 said:

Just a quick story. H and I went to a wedding in November 2011. We received our thank you note for their wedding exactly one year to the day of their wedding anniversary (Nov 2012). By that point I was kind of pissed that we had not received a thank you note. When I did finally receive it I just laughed at how long it took them to send them out, but did nothing to make up for the fact that it took her 1 whole year to send out maybe 60-70 thank you notes. That length of time is just ridiculous.

At least you received one. I have been to quite a few weddings where I have not received a thank you note for my gift. I fear it's becoming a trend.

Gisellerina · September 2013

Pre-wedding, I sent out Thank You notes as I received gifts, which really helped keep me from being overwhelmed post-wedding (I've sent about 300 so far) and also gave the early gift-senders a prompt Thank You. (Some friends and family started sending us gifts almost three months before the wedding). Post-wedding, I sent them out in small batches - making a weekly trip to the post office. I got them all out within 5 weeks from the wedding, with the exception of random gifts that occasionally show up now. I get those Thank Yous out within a week of receiving the gift.

emmyg65 · September 2013

We're sending them out as we finish them. The goal is to have them all done within three weeks of the wedding. My husband is writing the ones to his family and friends.

doeydo · September 2013

I haven't done any yet, but I think I would send them out all at once. If you have guests who know each other and on receives a thank you and the other doesn't for a while, it can be a little awkward.

MDbride1012 · September 2013

I think you are fine to send them out as you get them done.

LDubHawksFan · September 2013

doeydo said:
I haven't done any yet, but I think I would send them out all at once. If you have guests who know each other and on receives a thank you and the other doesn't for a while, it can be a little awkward.

But who really talks to one another about receiving thank you notes?? I don't think I have ever talked to mutual friends about TY notes I've received. The only way I think it might be the case is if the couple is super tardy.

I ended up sending all of ours out pretty much on back to back days, but I took off the week in between our wedding and one the next weekend, which we left for our honeymoon right after. I finished all of our TY notes by that Wed after our wedding. Unless you are able to turn around all of your notes in that sort of timeframe, I think sending them out as you finish is best.

bullfrogmama · September 2013

Maggie0829 said:

bullfrogmama said:

Awesome. That's what I'll do then. My issue is I can only work on them after 9PM, because I've got 2 small monsters (children, lol) who want nothing to do with me unless I sit down to get something done. Once they're in bed, I clean up the house, then I can finally sit down and do something non-mom related. My goal is 15/night, here's hoping!

What about your H? Can't he help to get them done as well? That way you aren't stuck writing 15 a night because 15 in one sitting is a lot on your hand, especially if you aren't used to writing without the help of a keyboard.

DH works second shift. He's home with the kids during the day, works at night. So he really doesn't have time to do them either. He can help on the weekend though!

itzMS · September 2013

DH & I sent them all at once (for gifts received at the wedding...those received prior were already sent).

We worked together to plow through them and get them out within a week of our wedding. It was so worth it. It took us 5 hours a night for 4 nights (so 40 hours of combined labor!)

HisGirlFriday13 · September 2013

I wrote the TYs for my first shower the day of the shower -- pounded them all out in one night (15 of them).

I have been writing TYs for pre-shower or pre-wedding gifts as we go, because I don't want to (a) forget to do it; (b) have people think I'm rude; or (c) have to have ONE MORE FREAKING LIST to keep track of.

I'll do the same for wedding gifts; just sit down and power through the TYs as quickly as I can. I'll probably prioritise doing cash/checks/gift cards first, so people know they didn't get lost, and then do the rest as quickly as I can. We're having a small-ish wedding, with fewer than 120 people/60 couples attending, so it shouldn't take me long.

Thank You Notes... How did you do it?

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