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Are pre-wedding parties a must?

Clpapke83Clpapke83 member
First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in Pre-wedding Parties
I know that the MOH and bridesmaids are supposed to set the parties up. I'm having a small wedding (aprox. 100 people). My bridesmaid will be my 13 year old daughter, and that's all I am having. I don't expect a child to set up any parties, but I think it would be rude to set it up myself. I don't really care if I get a bachlorette party, but is a bridal shower a must? I think FI will have some sort of bachelor party but it wont be anything big. If these parties are a must when do they take place? 
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Re: Are pre-wedding parties a must?

  • MobKazMobKaz member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Actually, no one is supposed to set up any pre-wedding parties.  Friends and family may choose to volunteer to host an event, but no one is under any obligation to do so.  And you are correct; the bride should not be hosting any of her own pre-wedding parties.

    None of these parties are "a must".  Showers typically occur anywhere between 1 to 3 months before the wedding.  The bachelorette party is typically held a little closer to the wedding date.
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  • Clpapke83Clpapke83 member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Thanks! I don't really want to do any of the parties anyways. Maybe I will just take the kids for ice cream when FI does his bachelor party. Sounds like a fun time to me :)
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  • MobKazMobKaz member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Perhaps you and your daughter could spend a day together going out to lunch, and doing something fun together.

    I noticed you are new to the boards.  Just a small FYI for you.....if you ask a similar question on more than one board, it is helpful to put "XP" in the title.  It stands for "cross posted" and informs posters that you have asked this question on multiple boards.  In this way, one poster isn't answering the same question on multiple posts.
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  • Clpapke83Clpapke83 member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Thanks for the info!  :)
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  • MandyMostMandyMost member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Even without a wedding party (aside from your daughter), I think it's fine if you want to have some celebratory events in the time leading up to the wedding with the important people in your life. Also, other people (even if not in your wedding party) may want to do something to celebrate your upcoming wedding, so it's good to be able to offer some ideas if they suggest something

    Personally, I find showers to be the very definition of hell, and can't imagine forcing the people I care about to sit through that kind of torture for me, so I will be fighting anyone who suggests giving me a shower. I've suggested instead inviting some women out for lunch, and/or partaking in some kind of fun (for me) event like wine tasting...both are occasions that will not include gifts. 
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  • erinlin25erinlin25 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    anybody can throw you a shower; however you cannot ask for one to be thrown for you.  Looks like you have a positive attitude about it, so its great that you are ok not having one.  But you never know a close friend or family member may offer to throw you one and that is ok.  Otherwise, don't worry your marriage will still be valid even without the "parties."  Enjoy the time, and it must be fun for your daughter to be included.  Have a fun girls day and go dress shopping for her or something.
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  • Clpapke83Clpapke83 member
    First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Thank you ladies so much! Actually the BM, FG, and the RB are my kids. So I'm just gonna do something special with the 3 of them. 
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  • kevinthkevinth
    First Comment First Anniversary
    I don't think the pre-wedding party must one. But it will be the useful to identify the errors before the actual wedding party planning. I would suggest, it is a good practice.
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  • doeydodoeydo member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    As PPs have said, it is not the bridesmaids' duty to throw pre-wedding parties.  They are thrown by whoever wants/volunteers to do them.  Your co-workers, friends, and/or family, might want to throw you one.  
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  • saseblon73saseblon73 member
    Name Dropper 5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    kevinth said:
    I don't think the pre-wedding party must one. But it will be the useful to identify the errors before the actual wedding party planning. I would suggest, it is a good practice.
    Huh?
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