OLW

loves2shop4shoes · September 2013

Dear Job Gods,

Thankyouthankyouthankyou!

Love,

Obsessive prayer
------------------------------------------

Dear @cu97tiger,

Next month.

Love,

Shoes

-------------------------------

Dear @buggle2,

Two days!!! Squee! Mr. Shoes is pumped for his impending bromance with Mr. Buggle.

Love,

State Neighbor

-------------------------------------------

Dear Mr. Shoes,

I'm sorry we fought last night. I hate fighting with you. I'm glad we resolved it, but I'll feel better when we have make up sex.

Love,

Horny wife
--------------------------------------------

Dear Midwest NEYers,

CAN'T wait for our G2G. Can. NOT. Wait!

Love,

Neighbor
------------------------------------------------------

Dear Brother,

I know you've been having a tough time accepting the sudden passing of your BFF's dad. I'm here for you.

Hug,

Your sister
--------------------------------------------------------

Dear New Boss,

Thank you thank you thank you thank you!

Love,

Have been praying for a job like this for 7 months

KeptInStitches · September 2013

Dear Shoes,

Yay!!! Congratulations! When do you start?

-Stitches

[Deleted User] · September 2013

to the people on my FB,

learn to read. SBUX is not banning guns. SBUX is not kicking out or punishing customers who choose to legally carry (in accordance with state laws). SBUX just doesn't dig guns on their property. I'm all for responsible, legal gun owners carrying their firearms. my dad packed heat to my wedding (and also made a comment about his gun feeling loose as we were walking down the aisle, as a joke). I have friends and family who carry most places, even at church. but SBUX is NOT BANNING GUNS ON THEIR PROPERTY. they would just prefer you leave it at home, and not in their stores. just like I'd prefer you to leave your gun at home, instead of bringing it into my house when you come over for dinner and games.

geez, people.

exasperated,
Coco

ETA: all that said, H and I do have a small gun in our home that stays put away and locked up safely. I don't want people to think I am down on having a firearm. I grew up around guns and knew they were hidden around the house, where a child could not reach them, but my dad could quickly get to it in case of an emergency. we were brought up learning about them and not to touch them under fear of death-by-spankings. but come on, most public places would prefer people not to bring in firearms. SBUX just went public about it because they were being dragged into the middle of a big conflict.

loves2shop4shoes · September 2013

KeptInStitches said:

Dear Shoes,
Yay!!! Congratulations! When do you start?
-Stitches

I start on Monday!!! Squee!

[Deleted User] · September 2013

Dear current job,

Holly balls....you're really starting to piss me off.

No love,

Your recruiter

Dear potential jobs,

I hope I like some of you.

Love,

potential future employee

Dear bachelorette party,

I'm soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo excited about you! Even if you're a month away, I just can't wait.

Love,

Me

Dear one friend in particular who is invited to Bach party but who is being a bitch,

Bitch please! Stop making all these demands and go with the flow...this party has been planned and if it doesn't work for you b/c you want to be picky then I'm sorry...you don't have to go.

Your about to be pissed off friend

[Deleted User] · September 2013

oh! and...

dear Jillian Michael's Yoga Inferno DVD,

please show up at my house, along with a cute yoga mat and some of those toeless no-slip sockies.

thanks!
soon-to-be-yoga'ed-out-and-lookin'-FINE Coco

CLoGreenEyes · September 2013

Dear Shoes,

Congratulations on the new job! That is awesome-sauce.

Amapola

***

Dear Man-friend,

Good talk last night (and also good sexy time). I appreciate you for always navigating the crazy straw that is my mind like a champion. Even though I hate the uncertainty of when we'll finally be able to take our next steps together, I know I am a lucky girl to have you to get through it with.

Love you like crazy,

Woman-friend

***

Dear med-surg exam,

You weren't that bad. But I'm scared of your younger siblings that are to follow later in the semester.

Thanks for the B,

Exhausted student nurse

***

Dear Bill Nye,

...I love the science videos.

Someone who watched DWTS this week

***

Dear Bill Engvall,

You're BF's favorite comedian, you manage to make me laugh, and you're not a half-bad dancer. So when are you coming to the DC area?

A new fan

***

Dear NEY,

I just really really like you guys a lot. Thanks for existing and being a part of my internet life.

Amapola

bethsmiles · September 2013

Students,
Get your shit together. This is really not the way to start out the semester!

Your Frustrated Teacher

-------------
Dear Universe,
Can it be time for BF to get a job offer please?

Stressed Out Girlfriend

Blackbird230 · September 2013

Dear monstrous salad in front of me,

I love you.

Sincerely,

Hungry worker

______________________________________

Dear coworker,

Yay you're getting married Saturday! Good luck dude.

Sincerely,

Rooting for you

_________________________________________

Dear BF,

This PMS week has surprisingly calmed down. Thank you for your support. I know you wanted to come up today, but got a working paid gig and can't. I still love you and can't wait to see you Friday.

Love,

Your crampy but surprisingly upbeat girlfriend

Blackbird230 · September 2013

@Amapola14 We love you too!

buddysmom80 · September 2013

Dear Boss,

You're an idiot. We talked this morning about the shit I'm going through then you call and yell at me about a system error on an account that wasn't my fault? Fuck that. I'm too stressed out for this shit.

Frustrated Employee

------------------------------

Dear BF,

I have been such an incredibly horrible bitch to you the past few weeks. I feel like shit, and I take it out on the wrong people. I'm sorry, and you don't deserve it. But, it gave you the motivation to put the rest of the pool equipment in the basement so there's that. I still love you.

-------------------------------

Dear CT scan,

Can we get some answers soon?

A frustrated patient

------------------------------

Dear Parents,

Please. Please. Let's not fight this weekend.

-------------------------------

Dear NEYers,

You rock my world.

Love,

Me

minskat30 · September 2013

@loves2shop4shoes - Congrats!!!

@amapola14 - I love Bill Nye too...poor guy was struggling on DWTS though.

Dear H,

I'm really sad you mentioned my weight gain again last night. I know my family has an issue with obesity, I know you have my best interest at heart and I know I've gained weight post-wedding but those conversations make me feel like a huge whale.

Sad W

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear Self,

Please stay on the exercise band wagon.

Tired,

Me

------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dear NEYers,

Thank you all for being so awesome and amazing.

minstkat30

Swazzle · September 2013

Dear @minskat30,

That makes me sad for you. I remember your wedding photos and even if you've gained since then I'm 100% positive that you're still gorgeous and shouldn't feel like a huge whale. HUGS.

**********

Dear @BriSox81, Sous, and Sak,

37 days, bitches!

**********

Dear @buddysmom80,

Survivor + wine + Big Brother + wine + texting you + wine = happy Swazzle.

**********

Dear H,

I want you to do whatever will make you happy. We will figure the rest out together. I love you.

minskat30 · September 2013

@swazzle - Thank you, I really appreciate that and just teared up for crying out loud...I'm overly emotional right now. H wasn't a jerk about it saying anything like "you need to lose weight" just concerned. He feels like a jerk now and I feel like shit...I just need to do something about it already. H has never struggled with weight (he has the metabolism of a teenage boy) so he doesn't understand how difficult it can be to have to constantly watch what you eat, how much you workout, etc. That combined with my long hours at work lately don't give me much motivation, but I need to stop with the excuses.

loves2shop4shoes · September 2013

minskat30 said:

@swazzle - Thank you, I really appreciate that and just teared up for crying out loud...I'm overly emotional right now. H wasn't a jerk about it saying anything like "you need to lose weight" just concerned. He feels like a jerk now and I feel like shit...I just need to do something about it already. H has never struggled with weight (he has the metabolism of a teenage boy) so he doesn't understand how difficult it can be to have to constantly watch what you eat, how much you workout, etc. That combined with my long hours at work lately don't give me much motivation, but I need to stop with the excuses.

@minskat30, You're hot. If I were a guy, I'd bang you like a drum.

You, no homo,

You're not a whale.

buddysmom80 · September 2013

Dear @swazzle,

I can't wait for tonight! I have two bottles of wine in the fridge ready to go!

Dear @minskat30,

You're gorgeous! We all love you!

Dear work (again),

Can I work one fucking week without crying at my desk??? I don't get paid enough for this stress.

Blackbird230 · September 2013

Dear body,

Instead of periods, can I please just have a little email that says not pregnant?

Thanks,

Annoyed female

psychbabe314 · September 2013

Dear Job

I hate you and have no love for you, or the raging/angry/yelling customers that you put me in contact with. I have no love for the lies you tell me, or the 5am meetings, or the new 5:45 am shifts that you decided to add into my schedule.

No Love,
angry associate
___________________________________________________________________________

Dear Dumb-ass Customers,

There is no reason, and I mean NO REASON, to ever, EVER, EVER whistle and call me over like a dog by calling out *dog whistle insert* here paint, here paint!

And you... what is the point of yelling at me? I did absolutely nothing wrong, have not even said a word to you and you feel it is appropriate to just go off on me? Go to our competitor. I don't care, the shocked look on your face when my response to "I'll just go to _____" is "okay" gives me at least a little satisfaction!

Please go die,
a real person
___________________________________________________________________________

Dear BF,

I love you so much! You really threw me off last night, but it was super cute :-)

Love,
your girlfriend
___________________________________________________________________________

Dear ex-supervisor/2nd mom

I'm sorry to hear about your niece. She has so much work ahead of her and I know you are stressed out! I'm here for you.

Hugs,
your 2nd daughter
___________________________________________________________________________
Dear random old lady who is a neighbor of BF's mom

Thank You!!!!! BF's mom keeps giving me the coupons you put aside for me every week! You are so sweet!!!!! I will make it a point to come meet you soon and personally thank you!

Love,
random girl you've never met
___________________________________________________________________________

Dear amoxacillin and body,

Please stop triggering my period. I understand that you are helped me with my double ear infection, but could you please make my period stop now? Same for your body... period should stop now.

Begging you,
a poor and sexually frustrated college student

loves2shop4shoes · September 2013

Kait said:

Dear body,

Instead of periods, can I please just have a little email that says not pregnant?

Thanks,
Annoyed female

That made me LOL. You're funny.

minskat30 · September 2013

@loves2shop4shoes - I need to meet you in person...you always make me LOL.

@buddysmom80 - Thanks for the love. Right back at you. You ladies are really the best. I'm sorry you are crying at your desk all the time. I'm right there with you for the last few weeks if it makes you feel any better.

CASK85 · September 2013

Dear Time,

Please slow down. I have so much to do before January it isn't even funny.

Pretty please,

C

********

Dear self,

Suck it up buttercup and brace yourself. The next 3 months are gonna get a little crazy. You can do it!

Love,

you're almost there!!!

******************

Dear committee,

In one week I need you to give me permission to write my thesis and your blessing to graduate before the end of the year. Please be supportive.

Sincerely,

I'm bringing cookies to the meeting

*****************

Dear NEY,

You ladies keep me entertained. Thank you!

cschiano

labro · September 2013

Dear New Job,

I can't wait to start next week! I have zero idea what I'm doing but I'm ready to hit the ground running!

So much love,

Your new employee

***

Dear Old Job,

Goodbye. I'm only a little bit sad to say bye to some of my coworkers...and also ridiculously happy that I won't have to see some of you ever again.

Peace bitches.

***

Dear Loft,

I love you, even though your full-price stuff is kind of expensive. I also really really love my new pants. I hope my co-workers don't mind that I'm AWing my new stuff right now...

***

Dear NEY,

You guys are awesome! I feel so much better this week now that some things (see new job) are finally working themselves out.

minskat30 · September 2013

@lmhollister - Congrats on the new job!

@cschiano - You are almost there! You must feel really freaking proud (and you should)!

cu97tiger · September 2013

Dear @loves2shop4shoes,

YES next month PLEASE.

Also, you effing rock and I'm so glad you got the job!

Love,

Tiger

======

Dear @cschiano,

Can't wait to meet you!!

Love,

DC-area NEYers

======

Dear @buddysmom80,

Let's make some plans for when you're in DC. @jenjenniferf and @flygirlmeg are down!

Love,

Tiger

======

Dear Management class,

Holy fuck, my brain is fried. So much good information, but now my job is a LOT harder. But a good harder, if that makes any sense. (A good harder.... that's what she said).

Love,

New Manager

======

Dear appointments,

Please get us pregnant.

KTHXBAI,

Me

minskat30 · September 2013

@cu97tiger - I've got my fingers and toes crossed for you to have lots and lots of babies (but hopefully not all at the same time...unless you want like 6 babies running around...in which case, I'll cross my fingers and toes for that).

CASK85 · September 2013

Dear @cu97tiger,

Right back at you

Andplusalso - all the baby vibes to you!

Love,

C

loves2shop4shoes · September 2013

@loves2shop4shoes - I need to meet you in person...you always make me LOL.

@buddysmom80 - Thanks for the love. Right back at you. You ladies are really the best. I'm sorry you are crying at your desk all the time. I'm right there with you for the last few weeks if it makes you feel any better.

YES! IRL G2G!!!! When?!

Peaseblossom55 · September 2013

Dear current job,

Only two more days left yay!! btw you aren't going to get much out of me for the next two days be prepared.

Me

Dear new job,

next monday I am so excited I can't wait!!!!

Excited Employee

Dear self

Only 7ish more weeks of studying first exam is next week. You better pass!!

Love

Me

bride2b71614 · September 2013

Dear Nephew,

Please stop dragging your cat up the stairs. I just stopped you from trying to give the him a toilet bath in the first floor bathroom, and I know that you are headed to the upstairs bathroom to do it again.

Love,

your aunt who actually knows all the tricks in the book.

Dear FI,

Thank you for being amazing. Seeing you in the living room with all the baby books had me swooning. Thank you for helping me with my nephew when my sister had a babysitting snafu. I watched you hold him in the air while running around and making airplane noises, it was adorable. I haven't seen him smile like that in a while. You just keep being you.

Love,

your FI

Dear creepy neighbor,

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP WATCHING PORN IN SURROUND SOUND!

-The disgruntled pregnant lady next door

Dear @Loves2shop4shoes,

Congrats on your new job!

Dear @cu97tiger,

Sending all the baby juju vibes your way.

Dear NEY board,

I love you.

That is all.

labro · September 2013

@peaseblossom55 Yay! Congrats on the new job! I start mine on Monday too!

Peaseblossom55 · September 2013

@lmhollister congrats!!

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