Wedding Woes

My parents are terrible, but generous, houseguests

Dear Prudence,
My husband and I live near a fall destination, and every year my parents plan a three-week visit. My parents are pushy, overbearing people. Everything must be done their way. They decide on what we all do every hour of the day, announce places for us to take them, and expect our undivided attention the entire time (no socializing with our friends or spending time on hobbies). All while my husband and I have full-time jobs. After they leave it takes us weeks to recover. They pay for everything while they're here and buy (unasked for) expensive items for us. Sometimes it’s stuff we really need (a new stove) while other times it's an item we don't want (a deep freezer). This makes my reluctance to have them visit difficult to explain: I can’t use the excuse we’re unable to afford hosting them for three weeks. How do I get them to stop hijacking my life every fall?

—Frazzled With a Nice Patio

Re: My parents are terrible, but generous, houseguests

  • Conn, tell them there is a new la Quinta that just opened in your neighborhood.

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  • "I'm sorry, that won't be possible." - And then go to your hobby meeting, a movie, whatever. 

    I don't understand people without backbones. Although, if these people raised her, I guess she never had the chance to develop one. 
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  • Alternately, she and her husband could have ridiculously loud sex every night of the visit. Probably wouldn't happen again. 
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  • Yeah, no way. My Mil tried once to invite the whole family to stay at our house for my baby shower, we responded in a very firm let us think about it, came back no, and she even apologized for not asking before extending the offer. Haven't had an issue since. Go grow that back bone Mrs Conn!
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