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NWR: Black Tie Optional

muenginerdmuenginerd member
5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

FI and I were invited to join family at a Charity Gala for a local theater.  Gala is hosted by my Aunt and Uncle and listed as "Black Tie Optional".  We honestly have never done an event of this caliber.  So I am wondering what is expected of dress?  "Optional" can easily go one way or another...

The gala is a Bollywood Theme to go in line with the theater's next production.  It will be held at a very nice hotel ballroom.  I'll be getting a longer dress for the event since most all my dress are shorter summer dresses.  FI will be wearing his suit he normally wears for weddings.  We'll be sitting at a table with my parents and two sets of cousins.  I know that my dad will be in a suit.  Suits are ok for this type of event as long as they are dressed up right?  I'll probably be getting a little bit brighter dress as it's a Bollywood event.  I found a really pretty red long dress.  I figured I could dress FI in a black suite, with black dress shirt and red tie to match the dress.           

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Re: NWR: Black Tie Optional

  • photokittyphotokitty mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Suits are fine, as tuxes are optional, not required.
    That sounds like an awesome fun time!!
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    And this is why events should be either black tie or not.  Putting "optional" in always gets people confused and second guessing themselves.  

    OP, I think a nice suit will be fine.

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  • NYCBruinNYCBruin member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Maggie0829 said:
    And this is why events should be either black tie or not.  Putting "optional" in always gets people confused and second guessing themselves.  

    OP, I think a nice suit will be fine.
    All of this.  This is exactly the confusion we describe when explaining the many reasons why BTO is rude.

    OP-I agree, a suit will be fine.
    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
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  • muenginerdmuenginerd member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary First Comment Name Dropper
    Thanks ladies.... we decided finally through emails flying back and forth.  The host is wearing a tux, all the other male family members are going with suits.  I agree BTO definitely leaves it open to questions what should be expected :(
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  • AroundTheBlockAroundTheBlock member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    A black suit with a white shirt is always acceptable evening dress for a gentleman who does not own black tie. It is also acceptable daytime dress for a gentleman who does not own a morning coat, and is acceptable for formal business occasions too. So your fiance should be fine as long as his suit is plain and very dark; and he has a white shirt.
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  • doeydodoeydo member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    You can dress up in a gown and your FI in a tux or you could wear a cocktail dress and he could wear a simple suit.  It's optional.
    image
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  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Ugh, BTO drives me nuts for exactly this reason. It's so opaque. It's fine if he wears a suit. If this is an annual event and you really want to, see if there are pictures online of last year's event and scope out what people were wearing.
    *********************************************************************************

    image
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