Timing the hotel block announcement

kitty8403 · October 2013

As part of my negotiations with the resort where we blocked out rooms, we agreed to an early release date so as not to be liable for the cost of any unbooked time. I didn't think there was an issue at the time.

It is now dawning on me that the etiquette lords may take issue here, as I must now inform people of the hotel block's existence at least 14 weeks out (allowing a two week window before it closes). We are basically the next thing from a destination wedding, in that we are not traveling but virtually everyone else is (families about 2,000 miles apart).

Do I

A. Send the invitations out 3-3.5 months ahead of my RSVP deadline

B. Stick it in with the STDs, which are not real invitations and might confuse people

C. Stick it on my wedding web site and pray someone finds it

Or D. Send a completely separate mailing, but before guests actually get their invitations?

AprilH81 · October 2013

I would do B, C and possibly email the guests the hotel information.

CLI242009 · October 2013

I second what AprilH81 said.

I work in a hotel, not on a resort but just a regular hotel and I have bridal party members calling the week of the wedding to book a room because they forgot. Then getting upset, going and telling the bride which gets her upset, because we were sold out and didn't have any rooms left.

B & C are good options. I am doing both. I have the hotel information on my wedding website & I'm putting the info on an insert in my invites. Just be prepared for those who are going to wait till literally the last minute or for those who forgot to book a room. If possible I would research hotels that are nearby, don't put the info out there just have it on you just in case this does happen and you can recommend this to those who are lagging behind. Or they'll have to pay the regular rate if any rooms are still available.

Jean0715 · October 2013

I second the PPs. I am doing B & C. Make a little insert for your STDs and put it in there also list your website in the STD. Stress that they must book the rooms by the date given by the Hotel in order to receive the discounted price.

Its a nice gesture to block the rooms, but you are ultimately not responsible for your guests arraignments.

delujm0 · October 2013

Do B and C, and also email your VIPs (close family, bridal party, etc) to let them know the details so that they won't be left in the dark. Everyone else can be treated as an adult - if you've done B and C, they have no room to complain if they can't get a room at the reduced rate.

You may be able to negotiate a bit with the hotel - for example, my "block" expires 3 weeks before the wedding, but if rooms are still available past that, the hotel will honor my special rate. So they will actually hold the agreed number of rooms until 3 weeks out, but if someone calls 2 weeks out after the rooms have been released and the hotel has available vacancy, the guest will still get the preferential rate. You can ask your hotel if they'd be willing to do that. However, if they get sold out, there's nothing you can do about it, obviously.

wrigleyville · October 2013

I wouldn't think it was weird if you sent it with my STD. I'd appreciate the heads-up so we could get the discount. I don't always look at wedding websites right away since I generally only use them for directions and pre-wedding get-together info (like Meet & Greets), so I'd probably see the hotel info too late.

melbelleup · October 2013

kitty8403 said:

As part of my negotiations with the resort where we blocked out rooms, we agreed to an early release date so as not to be liable for the cost of any unbooked time. I didn't think there was an issue at the time. It is now dawning on me that the etiquette lords may take issue here, as I must now inform people of the hotel block's existence at least 14 weeks out (allowing a two week window before it closes). We are basically the next thing from a destination wedding, in that we are not traveling but virtually everyone else is (families about 2,000 miles apart). Do I A. Send the invitations out 3-3.5 months ahead of my RSVP deadline B. Stick it in with the STDs, which are not real invitations and might confuse people C. Stick it on my wedding web site and pray someone finds it Or D. Send a completely separate mailing, but before guests actually get their invitations?

I did both B and C. I have accommodations on our save the date and then I also have info on our wedding website which is also on our STD.

CLI242009 · October 2013

Oh another note that I've seen Brides do for some of their VIPs - they book the room for them. If you decide to do this please let the person know (confirmation by email, anything).

I've seen Brides do this and the person doesn't know and ends up getting another room (or the Bride wants to surprise them and forgot to let them know they had a room OR they have their SO book a room and they use their name so the hotel doesn't know to say Oh hey ____ already has a room in their name) . Chaos and misunderstandings ensue >.>

Not fun.

Peaseblossom55 · October 2013

Our STD's are being ordered this weekend, the STD's have a link to our wedding website with all of the wedding details and hotel block information. Hopefully most people will go there for more details about the wedding.

cidefi · October 2013

I'm not doing STD's. But I'm in the same boat as you, meaning we have more guest traveling to the wedding vs those of us who live in host city. The hotel we going book is allowing us to make a deposit on so many rooms. Our guest will call the hotel directly to reserve what they need using a CC, and then afterwards we get our deposit back. Rooms have to be booked 30 days before the event, and they get a discount. I'm doing a pocket invitation to include all of these different enclosure cards in it, like the RSVP, a Cocktail card, a Map to the venue, Accomondations etc. ect. I'm mailing mine out 3 months before.

CLI242009 · October 2013

Peaseblossom55 - I don't know if any of you other ladies have had this problem but my side of the family well...let's just say I sent the StDs (had our names, the date and the city & state of our wedding & our wedding website. it even said for more info!!!) & I'm getting facebook messages, texts, emails, etc. from my family members (not my friends) asking me the most obvious questions!! @.@ So just warning you if you have apparently a family like mine, be prepared to get some very frustrating questions. Not everyone understands to go to the website to get more info. They think contacting the bride directly is the better solution.

cidefi - Definitely make sure you get the guests to book ASAP. I'm not sure if your hotel will be doing it, but I know if you don't get those rooms books you lose the deposit. I would definitely make sure what the contract says. I just know I've seen brides who think they get the deposit back on the rooms that were not picked up by guests. So be careful with that. I would hate for you to lose out on money.

I'm also doing pock invites. The inserts are RSVP (two sided) accommodations information, directions & reception card.

GrrArgh · October 2013

Peaseblossom55 said:

Our STD's are being ordered this weekend, the STD's have a link to our wedding website with all of the wedding details and hotel block information. Hopefully most people will go there for more details about the wedding.

In my experience, they wont. We are 3 months out and I'd wager 90% of people haven't looked at the website, and probably wont until bridal showers start happening but only then to probably look for a registry.

delujm0 · October 2013

GrrArgh said:

Peaseblossom55 said:

Our STD's are being ordered this weekend, the STD's have a link to our wedding website with all of the wedding details and hotel block information. Hopefully most people will go there for more details about the wedding.
In my experience, they wont. We are 3 months out and I'd wager 90% of people haven't looked at the website, and probably wont until bridal showers start happening but only then to probably look for a registry.

This. I don't look at the website until either (A) i have to buy a gift for a shower or (B) i'm about a month out from the wedding and need hotel block information. Don't assume everyone is checking the website as soon as the STD arrives. i would never think to book a room more than 1-2 months out unless I was explicitly told to.

newenglandgal0802 · October 2013

I am in the same situation. I am having my ceremony/reception at an old fashioned Inn in NH and most of our guests are from CT/MA. The Inn will hold all of the rooms until about a month and a half before the wedding so I want to make sure my guests know this way in advance so the rooms don't get booked up by others not attending the wedding. I am sending little info cards with my STD's and I have already told VIP's (parents, grandparents, bridal party, good friends, etc) so they all are aware if they want a room they have to act early. I am also putting all the info on our wedding website but for our guests who aren't as tech savvy I figured the info cards will be better.

CLI242009 · October 2013

delujm0 said:

GrrArgh said:

Peaseblossom55 said:

Our STD's are being ordered this weekend, the STD's have a link to our wedding website with all of the wedding details and hotel block information. Hopefully most people will go there for more details about the wedding.
In my experience, they wont. We are 3 months out and I'd wager 90% of people haven't looked at the website, and probably wont until bridal showers start happening but only then to probably look for a registry.
This. I don't look at the website until either (A) i have to buy a gift for a shower or (B) i'm about a month out from the wedding and need hotel block information. Don't assume everyone is checking the website as soon as the STD arrives. i would never think to book a room more than 1-2 months out unless I was explicitly told to.

I am beginning to figure this out. Having my guests contact me in any way or form trying to find out info that is on the website >.> very frustrating but I'll deal haha

Timing the hotel block announcement

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