Attire and Accessories

flower girl or jr. bridesmaid?

Hi! My fiance and I have an 11 year old who is going to be in our wedding.  Would she be considered a flower girl, or jr. bridesmaid?  Along with that, while looking at dresses online to get an idea would you look under flower girl dresses or do they have like a "tween" category?  If anyone knows let me know :))

Re: flower girl or jr. bridesmaid?

  • BlergbotBlergbot An enchanted land member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Third Anniversary First Answer
    I have the same issue. I think what I'm going to do is ask them what they would prefer to be called. As far as dresses goes, if you want a more traditional flower girl vibe, then you might try a department store. I've signed up for. Zulily and they have a lot of options (though I wouldn't buy until a couple months out, since she's a growing girl). If you want to go more the junior bridesmaid route, there are lots of options at places like Davids Bridal and Alfred Angelo. I'm going for a less traditional look, so I am looking at places like Areopostale and Forever 21 for tween styles that are a little less frilly.
  • princessleia22princessleia22 Oceanfront Property in Arizona member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    It really depends on what you want. I've see people use older flower girls and I've seen young bridesmaids. I have 3-year-old & 6-year-old nieces. Rather than having 2 flowergirls, we decided to make the 6-year-old a bridesmaid. And we also have an 11-year-old groomsman.

    We are currently shopping for dresses. You can find dresses at typical department stores. Or a lot of bridal shops have selection of junior bridesmaid dresses. Or even find an adult style and alter with straps or something if needed. For my 6-year-old niece, we are going back & forth between junior bridesmaid styles and colored flower girl dresses. At 11-years-old you may be able to shop adult or prom styles and find something that will work. There are a lot of more modest dresses out there that would work.


  • If you do make her a bridesmaid, please drop the 'junior.' It is condescending and unnecessary. After all, you're not going to call any adult bridesmaids 'senior,' are you?

    And I second asking her what she would like to be. Some eleven-year-olds will feel too old to be a flowergirl; others will love it.
  • My 10 year old niece will be a flower girl with my 2 year old niece.

    My problem is that she is very tall already (taller than me!) and looks like she could be 14. So the trick will be finding a dress for her because she still is just a little girl.

    Wedding Black & White, Sepia
  • doeydodoeydo Southwestern Ontario member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Ask her which she should prefer to be, she may feel that being a flower girl is something for only "little kids" or she might love the idea.  As for dresses, Alfred Angelo offers dresses that come in regular sizes and junior sizes as well:
    David's Bridal offers a few junior sized dresses that come in some of the same colours and fabrics as the regular sized bridesmaid dresses:
  • I've appointed my 10 year old to be a jr bridesmaid. I bought her a bridesmaid dress to be altered to her size and shape. A very small 10 year old could be a flower girl, but not my dd.
  • My nieces are 10 and 6 (will be 11 and 7 by the time of the wedding) And my was of asking was showing her a dress I liked and asking if she wanted to be in my wedding. I told her that her little sister would be a flower girl, and mommy would be a bridesmaid, and what did she want? The way her eyes lit up at flower girl was my indicator that it wasn't too young for her at all, because she was so excited.
  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Definitely ask what she prefers and definitely drop the "junior" if she chooses bridesmaid. They all do the same thing. There is no need to give her a different title. Like Allie said, you aren't calling the other 'maids "senior," so why call her "junior"? 

    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
  • I was a junior bridesmaid when my mom got re-married.  I was about 9 and getting to be on the same level as my mom's friends made me feel so grown up!  I would have been happy to be a flower girl at that age, but the added honor of being a junior bridesmaid made me incredibly trilled and proud of myself. 
    I would say at age 11 "junior bridesmaid" would likely be what she'd prefer, but ask her :) 

  • Thank you everyone for the advice! We did ask her and she wants to be a flower girl. I think she just wants to throw the flowers :) And she wants a poofy dress- so now the search for that as well as my dress and bridesmaid dresses is on- OH BOY! I am in big time wedding mode right now but I don't seem to be moving forward with anything yet- I guess in time! Thanks again everyone!!!! 
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards