Catholic Weddings

Program question

I am Catholic and FI is Protestant (from a small evangelical denomination).  We are having the Rite of Marriage Outside of Mass, and the officiant will be a deacon who is a personal friend.  We are having FI's family pastor say a prayer during the ceremony, just a small thing-- FI's family love him, but neither FI nor I are crazy about him, and FI has mostly been coming to Mass with me, although we occasionally go to his church's service.  We wanted to involve the pastor as a nod to FI's faith tradition and to his family.

So here's the issue: on the program, I have no idea what to call the role the pastor is playing.  That is, the deacon is identified as "Deacon [Name], Officiant," the lectors are labeled as "lectors," the cantor is labeled "cantor," etc.  What is an appropriate and respectful role name to give the Protestant pastor who is just saying a prayer?  "Rev. [Name], ???"  The deacon has said that we could use the phrase "Assisting Minister," but that seems a little grandiose for the level of involvement we're actually giving him, and I almost worry that it would call attention to how LITTLE he's doing in the ceremony.  Since the deacon is coming in from out of state, using an adjective like "Visiting" or "Guest" for the local Protestant pastor would also feel a little odd, but might still be appropriate.  Any ideas?

Re: Program question

  • meltoinemeltoine member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Comments First Answer
    edited February 2014
    I would just put (denomination) minister. That way your FI's family knows that he represents their faith, and your family understands who he is.

    Prayer Number Two , Reverend Bob Smith, Baptist Minister  


    Prayer Number Two, Reverend Bob Smith, Pastor, Pleasantville First Baptist Church
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  • I like Meltoine's second suggestion, with identifying the church congregation FI's family's minister is from, because that also recognizes the congregation that is meaningful to them.

    Another option: Use his honor title and then note his relationship like you might be doing for the lectors, so if you say "Sue Smith, Lector, Friend of the Bride," you use Rev. Joe Jones, Friend of the Groom's Family (or, Friend of the Brown Family).  His title of Rev. or Preacher or whatever he prefers indicates he's clergy, so you don't need to specify that if it's getting awkward.

    I went to a wedding between a Catholic and Protestant in which the bride's grandfather was a Protestant minister who said a short "prayer instruction" to the couple.  I think they listed him using the approach immediately above.

    Another way also to honor your FI family's faith tradition is to ask one of them to prepare and pray a blessing over the reception meal, if the Catholic officiant will not be attending the reception.  (Though he may be there, coming in from out of town and all.)
    "Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are Mine!" (Isaiah 43:1)
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