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Catholic Weddings

Where do I start...

My fiance is not a Catholic, but I am. So I would prefer we get married at a Catholic Church. I was baptized and confirmed at the Catholic Church in the town we are currently living in so technically I am a member. But I'm concerned about 2 big things.

1. I haven't been to church in a very long time.
2. I am not a fan of the church I was baptized/confirmed in and would prefer to have our ceremony at one of the Catholic churches in a neighboring city.

All of this leaves me really confused and not really sure what to do. Should I just start calling various churches and see if they would accept us? Do we need to become members of a church for them to even consider marrying us? Is it going to be hard for us to have a Catholic wedding because my fiance doesn't want to convert?

Re: Where do I start...

  • First welcome!

    I would pick a church where you can see yourself becoming a member, baptizing future children, making it your family church etc. Start attending mass there (and consider going to confession if you want to start receiving communion again, I know this can be terrifying. I have gone almost a decade in the past without going to confession so can completely relate to being nervous but it really feels so wonderful when you are done). I would try to make an appointment with the priest at the church you want to be your church. Explain to him that you have been away from the church for a while but would like to become a member of this church and it is important for you to have your marriage in the church. He will likely encourage you to continue attending mass regularly and go to confession. You and your FI will also need to do pre-cana marriage preparations with the priest (requirements can vary a bit by diocese).

    Your fiance does not have to be Catholic nor does he have to convert. This should not be an issue. He does have to be open to having children and agree to not interfere with you raising them in the faith. You will promise to raise children Catholic. You may be encouraged to have a wedding ceremony outside of mass because you both cannot receive communion, although this is just as valid as a ceremony within mass.

    Below is also a great resource which really helped me when planning my Catholic wedding. The ladies on this board are also very knowledgeable and happy to help :)
  • Everything Tami said was awesome. I just want to echo her advice to choose the church you want to be your family church.



  • ditto Tami!
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