Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

XP Who hands out programs?

We're trying to plan our wedding ceremony, and we are not sure who should hand out programs at the church as guests arrive - and who we should have pass out whatever item(s) we use in the send-off outside the church afterwards? It feels rude to delegate that to a guest/family/friend (which is what I've seen done at weddings I've been to), so I don't want to do that, but I'm not sure how those items get handed out to everyone at the right time. Any thoughts would be appreciated!

Re: XP Who hands out programs?

  • Listen to your instinct: it IS rude to delegate a job to someone who could otherwise relax and enjoy your wedding. 

    A couple options:
    1. Ask the church if they have staff on hand that can do it. 
    2. Put the programs in a basket on a stand in the middle of the doorway to the sanctuary; do the same thing for your tossing items (please make sure your church is ok with cleaning up whatever mess you're going to make) at the exit doors.  
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  • Those things don't need to be handed out. Just put them in baskets near the entrance and people will take them when they come in.
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  • Thanks! Couple clarifications... there won't be anyone from the church on staff that day (I asked, they used to have a wedding coordinator on staff but no longer do). Also, people will be entering & exiting primarily through the same doors at the back of the church (though they have the option of using a couple other side entrances) - so there isn't a clear, separate entrance & exit. My fear is if we set both the programs and the send-off items out by the doors for people to take, people will grab both on their way in. We are using plastic hand-clappers in our wedding colors for the send-off (as noise-makers, not something to be tossed), and our priest expressed concern that if guests have access to these beforehand, especially children, they could use them to make noise & disrupt the ceremony... I'm sure I'm over-thinking this, just not sure what to do!
  • If you're all coming and going through the same door, one of your ushers/BP/parents/you/whoever opens and closes the door can just swap out the basket of programs for the basket of clappers either just after everyone is seated or just before everyone exits so they can grab on their way out. That's not a big deal to ask of anyone. Just have it tucked away nearby and it's a quick switch.

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  • That makes a lot of sense... thanks!!
  • We had the ushers to it
  • My fiance's two nephews, ages 11 and 13, will be handing out out programs
  • @laurennx3 Please do not give shitty jobs to these kids, or anyone for that matter, unless you plan on paying them as a vendor.  It is not an honour and not necessary whatsoever.
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  • @doeydo Actually, it was per their request. But thanks for your unsolicited advice!
  • I helped with that at a few weddings when I was younger and loved being a part of the day- I don't think there's anything wrong with asking younger family members who would like it!
  • I'm going to ask my ushers to do this along with seating guests. I don't think it's a shitty job at all. I specifically asked three of our younger cousins to be ushers for the purpose of handing out programs while offering to seat guests and escorting FI's mother and our grandmothers.
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  • laurennx3 said:

    @doeydo Actually, it was per their request. But thanks for your unsolicited advice!

    Often people just offer to be polite. It's certainly ok to say "thanks for offering, but just sit back and enjoy the ceremony!"
  • We had three close friends be our ushers. They were thrilled to help and worked out well. One of the ushers also walked my mom down the aisle so that she wouldn't have to walk down alone. 
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