Pre-wedding Parties

If you're married, is it OK for you host a bachelor/ette party?

Just curious, I seem to get mixed answers from people. 

FYI I'm not married and planning one, nor is someone that's married planning one for me. I just simply love to learn. Thanks!

Re: If you're married, is it OK for you host a bachelor/ette party?

  • Why would it not be okay?  Anyone can host a bachelor/ette party.  Married, not married, divorced, separated, etc it doesn't matter.

    It would be the same as saying that you can only host a baby shower if you have had a baby. Doesn't that sound silly?

    For the people telling you that it is not okay to host a bach party if you are married, what reasons are they giving as to why it is inappropriate?  Because I am interested to hear their reasons.

  • I ... don't even understand why this is a question.
  • It does sound silly. The people who have told me they don't think it's OK or proper tend to be older. Their reasoning (if I remember correctly) is that traditionally, bridesmaid and groomsmen were single people, and that it would have been improper for married people to arrange for a night of flirting and frollicking.
  • I've never even been to a bachelorette party, so all I know about them is what I've seen in movies (and I'm sure Hollywood dramatizes the heck out of those).
  • It does sound silly. The people who have told me they don't think it's OK or proper tend to be older. Their reasoning (if I remember correctly) is that traditionally, bridesmaid and groomsmen were single people, and that it would have been improper for married people to arrange for a night of flirting and frolicking.

    Okay, I think I get where they are coming from.  They are going with the idea that the bachelor (ette) party is the last night of "freedom" and going out with your single friends.  Behavior that married people should not engage in.    
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I don't think flirting is a requirement at a bachelor/bachelorette party and actually I think it would be kind of fucked up if the engaged couple were flirting with other people at this parties.  Go out and have a good time, get drunk, but don't try to pick up other women.  Gross and rude.
  • Some people have such weird ideas about wedding stuff.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • mysticl said:
    It does sound silly. The people who have told me they don't think it's OK or proper tend to be older. Their reasoning (if I remember correctly) is that traditionally, bridesmaid and groomsmen were single people, and that it would have been improper for married people to arrange for a night of flirting and frolicking.

    Okay, I think I get where they are coming from.  They are going with the idea that the bachelor (ette) party is the last night of "freedom" and going out with your single friends.  Behavior that married people should not engage in.    
    And behavior that an engaged and soon to be married person should not be engaging in either.

  • mysticlmysticl member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    mysticl said:
    It does sound silly. The people who have told me they don't think it's OK or proper tend to be older. Their reasoning (if I remember correctly) is that traditionally, bridesmaid and groomsmen were single people, and that it would have been improper for married people to arrange for a night of flirting and frolicking.

    Okay, I think I get where they are coming from.  They are going with the idea that the bachelor (ette) party is the last night of "freedom" and going out with your single friends.  Behavior that married people should not engage in.    
    And behavior that an engaged and soon to be married person should not be engaging in either.
    I was referring to going out with single friends and drinking and dancing.  Some people have the theory that married people hang out with married people.  If you do out with the girls it's other married women and you do lunch and/or shopping.  You don't hit the clubs.  
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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