Wedding Woes

I'd find a different venue to have my wedding

Dear Prudie, My fiancé and I are getting married soon at his parents’ house, and everything is great except that my future brother-in-law and sister-in-law are insisting on bringing their three dogs along. Two of the dogs are old and sick, another is a young terrier who has a nose for trouble. We’re doing our own catering, so I’m not looking forward to cooking with so many dogs around. The two larger dogs also keen very loudly if their owner is out of sight. My fiancé’s family is acting like he and I are selfish for not wanting these dogs around at our wedding. A polite request to not bring them was met with a minor fit about how they didn’t have time to interview dog sitters and a threat that the brother-in-law would stay home if the dogs couldn’t come. Also these future in-laws are not married yet and are not going to have the dogs at their church wedding. There’s a nice kennel where they can board their dogs for the day, but the sister-in-law has said they will not go to a kennel. What can we do about this? —Three-Dog Blight

Re: I'd find a different venue to have my wedding

  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    I so don't 'get' people. (I am a pet person. I'm in a quandary because one of my pets bites non residents who come into the house, so it's hard to kennel/get a sitter. I'm managing. [to be fair, DevilCat didn't BITE the last non resident who came into the house...he did, however, rush the door and TRY to bite the UPS man. The Mr. grabbed kitty so there wouldn't be biting and so kitty clawed the Mr.])
  • They can't leave the dogs along for a day?  I've left my rabbits alone for an entire weekend.  I mean, they were buried up to their ears in extra food, but they can last a bit without me.  These dogs can last for a few hours. 
    Of course, if they live far enough away that they can't walk them in between, or if they can't find someone to walk them while they're gone, that's another story, I suppose.  Unless the dogs are litter-trained.  

  • I suspect they've been allowed to bring their dogs there before and that's where this might be coming from.  That doesn't make their behavior right at all.

    I'd leave this to FI's parents and they need to put their foot down.  If they won't I'm not sure there's much else to be done.  You can't force them to not show up with dogs in tow.
  • edited June 2014
    Woah woah woah. They would need to "interview" dog sitters? People actually do that?? 

    I have a 10 lb chihuahua who I consider to be my furry toddler, and I hate boarding him, but at the end of the day, I get that not everyone feels that way about animals and I'm not going to force him on anybody. He could stay at home by himself, or I'd have a neighbor/friend pop over and check on him. I don't need to 'interview' a dogsitter. Weirdos. 


    Edited because typos suck.
    Anniversary



  • lynze425 said:
    Woah woah woah. They would need to "interview" dog sitters? People actually do that?? 

    I have a 10 lb chihuahua who I consider to be my furry toddler, and I hate boarding him, but at the end of the day, I get that not everyone feels that way about animals and I'm not going to force him on anybody. He could stay at home by himself, or I'd have a neighbor/friend pop over and check on him. I don't need to 'interview' a dogsitter. Weirdos. 


    Edited because typos suck.
    If I had a stranger coming into my home to care for my pets, I absolutely would want to interview them first, and I'd want them to meet my dogs before they just showed up at the house to walk them. I'd also want to make sure the dogs were comfortable around that person - it's a lawsuit waiting to happen if a stranger just comes in the house and starts interacting with animals who don't know them. 

    A lot of people don't have the luxury of just having a friend or neighbor "pop over" to check on their pets. We're fortunate that one of my friends and her fiance are willing to come over and feed my hedgehog and leopard gecko while we're away. Even though the dogs have met them, i would still never ask them to come over and care for the dogs for fear that they would be territorial if we were not around. Our puggle has nipped at strangers who got in his face, and our bullmastiff (who is generally very calm and sweet) could do a lot of damage at ~125lbs. 

    We board our dogs with their vet (and at a kennel in the past). We've seen the facilities, know the staff and are comfortable having the dogs there. The dogs don't love it, but they like the staff, and haven't had any issues. 

    I can understand the OP's frustration with her fILs, but I think it's ultimately their call. Personally, I wouldn't want the dogs there because it's a liability for the guests, and I don't feel it's right to impose my dogs on others, but it's not my decision.
  • GBCKGBCK member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper Combo Breaker
    I sure as hell am not giving someone a house key w/o interviewing them.

    (and the only one we hired out of the phone book had to give me proof she was bonded and insured)
  • @*Barbie* and @GBCK I totally agree. Since I do have lots of local people and places to board that I like I guess it's never occurred to me that some people would have to have a stranger watch their animals. When I first read the line about the couple interviewing dogsitters, in my head I imagined them grilling their neighbor or friend over why they should trust them, etc. which seems humorous to me. But yeah I would never just let some rando in my house to watch my dog :)
    Anniversary



  • @lynze425 - we moved across the country when I was ~6 months pregnant. We didn't know anybody in town, and didn't have any nearby relatives. I ended up having pregnancy complications and landed in the hospital at 33 weeks and was induced at 33W6D. I had about 2 hours advance notice of the induction. Since we were new in town and hadn't had a chance to set up vet care or boarding options for our dogs, my husband had to scramble around and find a place who could take them immediately so he could come to the hospital while I was in labor and recovery (since he planned to stay with me until I was discharged). We were just lucky that our vet was able to work with us and take the dogs on short notice (especially since we were new clients.)
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