My dad got married when I was 20 and I have never felt close with his wife. The problem is that she is very sensitive and has never had kids of her own and likes to think of me and my sister as her children, even though we aren't close and were adults already when she entered the family. Long story short, it makes me uncomfortable, it makes my mom feel insecure and jealous, and it stresses me out whenever they are together.
My wedding is in a week, and just tonight I sent out the schedule of events to those invited to our very small (19 people) ceremony. Unfortunately I made the mistake of including in the schedule that I wanted my mom, sister (MOH), FMIL, and my close friend who is also the photographer to all be with me when I'm getting ready for the ceremony. My intent was not to make it clear that my dad's wife was not invited, I was just thinking of making sure those people I wanted there knew where to go and what time to be there. I'm a very private person, the room is small, and I really wanted to enjoy getting ready with the people I love most.
Well, now my dad has sent me a message back asking if it was a mistake that his wife was not included in the list to be there. I have no idea how to address this with him, and if I should say something to his wife about this. Knowing her personality, even if I hadn't included who was going to be with me when I get ready in the schedule, she would have asked where to go.
One more bit of info to help you guys give me some advice: I'm very close with my FMIL, and my fiance's parents are paying for about half of the ceremony and reception and my fiance and I are paying for the other half.