Wedding Woes

I want to punch this lady's husband

Dear Prudie,
My husband and I had a baby girl five months ago. Before she was born, we had a long conversation about breast-feeding versus formula and decided that breast-feeding was best and that I would try to do it for a year. The problem is that I’m completely miserable. I work full-time and it’s really stressful to fit pumping into my schedule. My breasts are constantly sore and I am always exhausted. Our daughter is beautiful and healthy and I want to do the right thing, but I don’t know how much longer I can bear this. My husband doesn’t want me to stop. Every time I mention formula, he gives me all the reasons why breast-feeding is best. He suggests I talk to our doctor or La Leche League. I don’t want to pump her full of chemicals or have her immune system to suffer either, but I’m desperate. What can I do? I feel so guilty about all of it.

—Running Dry


Re: I want to punch this lady's husband

  • *junkpunch*

    5 months is awesome, she should lighten her load by loosing the husband.

    (although if she *wanted* to stick it out, I'd probably say that for me, somewhere around month 6 or 7, things got easier. )
  • And this is why women go off the deep end after having a baby. Because of people like this who find ways to make them miserable and not listen.
  • Hubby has the rudimentary ductwork and manboobies, am I correct? Then pick up the slack and start lactating.

    Can't do it, won't do it? Awww, then eff off.

    Yeah, want to know a sizeable PP contributor? Everyone's unsolicited, uninformed opinion. And the "fuck you" filter isn't fully engaged, stuff cuts deeper than it ever should.
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  • It was one thing for the husband to be supportive when she wanted to breastfeed.  But this is way over the line.  Can he not see that she's miserable?  And does he just not care?  I love that he's sooooo concerned about the baby, but his wife is basically only a means to an end.  Nice.
  • The gentle supportive husband response "I want to thank you for everything you have done for our baby.  I know it is physically and emotionally hard and you have done a wonderful job.  I support you in whatever decision you make. 

    I did research LLL. They have meetings at x,y,z and can offer 1,2,3 for support. If you are interested I will go with you and do whatever it takes.  Formula is not evil.  We will not be pumping our child full of chemicals.  We will feeding her the best way possible for our family.

    This is YOUR decision.  I know that we had talked about trying for a year but 5 months is outstanding and I'm amazed at what you have done."

  • only 10% of working moms are still bfing at six months.

    i hope every time the husband wears earbuds, they get caught on a  doorknob.
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  • I wonder how a convo about getting the big snip would go over with him.
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  • That guy definitely earns the "Punch to the Junk" badge!!!
  • My husband has absolutely no opinion on this matter and just accepts that I want to try to breastfeed for at least a year. If I stop breastfeeding, it won't matter to him. If I'm upset because I can't produce or have to stop for some other reason, the only reason he'd be upset is because I'm upset, not because I'm stopping breastfeeding.

    People need to stop being so shitty to pregnant women and new moms.

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