Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

No Garter Toss

I'm posting this here because my FI doesn't want to do the Traditional garter toss. I was kind of disappointed, but then I read about some alternatives.

The one that really caught my eye is a alternative for the garter toss, and could alot replace the dollar dance(which i really do NOT want to do!). It's a garter raffle! Guests buy raffle tickets for $1 each at the reception, and towards the middle of the reception a raffle ticket is randomly picked out of a bucket by the bride & groom,  and that person gets the garter! The bride and groom keep the proceeds.

Does this sound lame? Or like we are asking for money? I think it would be a fun alternative to two things we dont want to do(garter toss and dollar dance)

Would you guys ever do this?

Re: No Garter Toss

  • edited December 2010
    Garter raffles or auctions are generally frowned upon on TK because yeah, it's "asking for money" and is in fact tacky as hell.

    However in some regions of the country they're perfectly acceptable socially (as in, no one will give you the side eye).  I dunno how it is down in Nebraska but during our engagement I expressed wishes to not have a garter auction at our reception and everyone thought I was nuts.  So we had one anyway.  Just know your audience.
    panther
  • I'm not having a bouquet OR garter toss, and I usually don't bring cash with me when I go to weddings so I don't know how successful a garter raffle would be. If you were going to do it I'd have proceeds going to charity or something.
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  • aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
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    edited December 2010
    Your guests should never have to open their wallets at your wedding for anything.  We just skipped both tosses, no one missed them.

    ETA: As far as the dollar dance, you can either skip that entirely, or take money out of the equation and just open the floor for guests to dance with the bride and groom.
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  • I've never heard of a garter auction, but honestly I do not think it is a good idea. To me it would feel like your were asking for money instead of replacing the garter toss. If FI is against having a garter toss he probably won't want to do the garter auciton.
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  • I don't see much of a difference between the dollar dance and this raffle idea. Either way you are asking your guests to give you money. I hope you change your mind on the raffle thing and not do anything with the garter. Waste of money, IMO.

    I like aerinpegadrak's idea of dancing and mingling with your guests. What a novel idea! 
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  • We aren't doing a garter toss either.

    I don't think its a good idea to raffle off a garter.  It just seems wrong to auction off a piece of lingerie to your closest family and friends.  What kind of guy other than your husband would want it? 
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  • Why not donate the money to a charity of the winners choice instead of keeping it?
  • Under no circumstances should your guests have to pull out their wallet at your wedding.
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  • edited December 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_garter-toss-3?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:2074c596-6183-4792-bf13-a4b5fa1c0983Post:324b7844-cb46-4445-8f71-6c9589d58443">Re: No Garter Toss</a>:
    [QUOTE]Under no circumstances should your guests have to pull out their wallet at your wedding.
    Posted by jagore08[/QUOTE]

    This.

    If I heard a raffle announced during a wedding I was attending, I would squirm.  And probably make a beeline for the restroom.
  • I just dont get the need for a garter. The last thing I want is for my dress to get pulled up during a wedding and who-knows-what be hanging out and on display in front of 150 people but that's just me.
  • Your considering selling raffle tickets for your gater.  The key word being "selling". And then you ask if it sounds like you'reasking your guests for money.   You really had to ask if it sounds like you're asking your guests for money? 

    I absolutely agree with the previous posters who said you should never ask your guests to pull out their wallets - that means paying for drinks, dollar dances, or raffle tickets. They are you GUESTS, not your customers.


  • In MY Oppinion you should not do the raffle cause like many already said it. Is like askin them for $$$ if they want to give you $ they will you dont need to do a raffle thats kind of weird specially for a wedding!
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  • Don't do a raffle. If you don't want to do the garter toss, don't do it.

    H & I  did one, but we did a combined garter/bouquet toss, and did it to "Take Me Out to the Ballgame". We choreographed the whole thing for timing's sake and it wasn't a gorss head-up the dress event.  Do something more creative if you want to do it, but if not, definitely don't "sell" it.
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