Wedding Woes

CANCELLED WEDDING - USED GIFTS

My fiance decided he's not ready to get married so, we're not getting married. I know we are supposed to return the gifts, but we have used many of them already. Should I reimburse people for their gifts that we have used?

Re: CANCELLED WEDDING - USED GIFTS

  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    This is why you aren't really supposed to use the gifts until after the wedding.  Depending on the circumstances, yes you probably should go repurchase the gifts and then return them, or just reimburse the money.  Some people won't want to accept it but some might expect it back.
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  • e_signae_signa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    thanks for the help. I realize now that we should not have used them, but i never thought this would happen. And technically they were housewarming gifts......
  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Well were they wedding gifts or housewarming gifts?

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  • e_signae_signa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We received them at a housewarming party. I still feel like i should reimburse the givers though.
  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Oh, well I don't think a housewarming party relates to your wedding.  Did you guys just move in together or something?  I don't know, in that case, I don't think I would return or reimburse anyone.  If they were from a bridal shower or engagement party, yes, but otherwise no I don't think I would.
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  • e_signae_signa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    We/He bought a house shortly after our engagement. I just got out of my lease 3 weeks ago and moved in. Then he dropped this on me Saturday. So not only do I have to cancel all my vendors and return gifts, but now I have to find another place to live.

  • edited December 2011
    Are they off your registry? I think if they were purchased from a registry, they need to be returned. If the wedding is called off or annuled within a year, you need to return the gifts or reimburse the giver for them.
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  • e_signae_signa member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011

    They are from the registry. I will be reimbursing people for the used gifts. Thanks for your help.

  • danieliza1127danieliza1127 member
    5 Love Its First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Signa, I'm sorry this happened to you.  what a huge thing to be going through.  If I were you, I wouldn't even be worrying about the gifts right now.  Your friends and family will completely understand.  Get yourself settled and worry about the gifts after the first of they year.

    I'm sure getting money or gifts back from you is the LAST thing on anyone's mind right now.
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  • RaiKaiRaiKai member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Sorry to hear your news signa.  Has the relationship also ended then as well (i.e. not just the engagement/wedding plans)?

    I would not worry about the gifts right now. Unless the wedding was supposed to be right around the corner, no need to rush out right this week to formally inform people it is off either.

    Find a new place to live, and take some time for yourself right now without worrying about others. This is all still quite "new" and people I am sure will be very understanding.
  • edited December 2011
    So sorry to hear of your situation.  Yes, return the gifts if you can but I'm sure your friends and family will be much more concerned with you finding a place to live etc...  More important to get that together first, I would think.  Good luck to you.
  • Theresa626Theresa626 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    How long have you been engaged? Was the wedding supposed to be soon?  I'm so sorry you are going through this right now.  It must be really difficult.  I'd just take some time for yourself for a few weeks before worrying about the gifts to return. 
  • dianenjnjdianenjnj member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    i agree with what others have said...you have bigger fish to fry right now.  i'm sure your friends and relatives will understand this.
  • Manda724Manda724 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    i think the gifts are the last thing on everyone's mind. just worry about what you need to do first. then when you are settled figure out what to do.

    Big hugs and lots of love .... everything will be ok.
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