And that is when my motivation died.

novella1186 · February 2015

I had a couple big research projects to start on, so I got all fired up this morning, set up the projects, and got to work. About 2 hours in, I find out that the person who needs the research gave me the wrong parameters, so I had to start all over again. Ok. Annoying, and really lazy of her, not to mention totally careless, but ok.

So I started over.

Then my phone starts flashing because I have an e-mail from my caterer, who I've been waiting to hear back from. Normally I would ignore it till later, but since I was annoyed about starting the project over, I decided to take a break from it and look at the email. It included some details I hadn't thought of before. So then I got caught up worrying about all these stupid details. The damn details! I hate them. For example, the caterer can set aside leftovers for FI and I to eat after the wedding, but there is no refrigeration at the venue so he asked if we could bring a cooler with ice. Of course, no big deal. But how big of a cooler? Who will bring it? Who will go buy the ice? Who will take it back to the house we're renting? What if the caterer brings the wrong color linens? Will I make them switch them out, or just let it go? What little mishaps are even worth getting upset over? What if the dessert people forget the chocolate mousse? Seriously, my neurotic imagination just completely lost control from there, and it was pretty damn tough to reign it back in. This is just how I am. Stupid senseless worrying about EVERYTHING.

Then I had checked in with a friend of mine because she still hasn't RSVPd for the bachelorette party which is in 2 weeks, and the host asked me if I could check with this friend. I've known this girl since we were 6 years old -- 22 years-- so I'm close with her entire family.

When she texts me back, she tells me she is currently at the hospital because her aunt -- who I've also known nearly my whole life-- had 2 major strokes and is in a medically induced coma, and they have no idea how much damage has been done. This is the same friend whose infant daughter was in the hospital last month with pneumonia. I can't even imagine the amount of stress and worry she and her mom have been dealing with, and now this.

So then I'm sitting at my desk crying like an idiot. I'm typically not a crier, but if someone I care about is going through something awful, and/or I'm worried about someone's life possibly being at risk, it gets me every time.

I kind of think I should just ask the host to cancel the bachelorette party. The other girl who hasn't RSVPd yet is the one whose mom is in chemo, and one girl who had RSVPd yes is the one whose mom suddenly died a couple weeks ago. I feel like it's so stupid to even ask people to attend a party when there are way bigger, more important things that they're battling right now.

So then I got back on TK. Needless to say my big research project has fallen by the wayside. I have 0 interest in working on it right now.

What things are you guys avoiding today?

theycallmelinz · February 2015

I'm sorry to hear that your girls are going through such a tough time! I'm not sure what the best way to handle the bach party is, but good luck with that.

I'm avoiding my billing today. Because I spent all day Tuesday doing last month's billing (because I let myself get behind) so now I don't feel like doing more billing. This is what we call a 'pattern', people lol

levioosa · February 2015

I'm so sorry to hear what is going on in your friends' lives. Hugs and happy thoughts all around.

I'm trying to decide what tea to make. I stayed up late watching Orange is the New Black for the first time, and I'm dying today. Do I want Pumpkin Spice Brulee? Dragonfruit? Paris? Tower of London? English Breakfast? Caribe? Green tea? So many options!

novella1186 · February 2015

levioosa said:

I'm so sorry to hear what is going on in your friends' lives. Hugs and happy thoughts all around.

I'm trying to decide what tea to make. I stayed up late watching Orange is the New Black for the first time, and I'm dying today. Do I want Pumpkin Spice Brulee? Dragonfruit? Paris? Tower of London? English Breakfast? Caribe? Green tea? So many options!

I just finished my Earl Grey. I'm a creature of habit; I have to drink that every morning or my day can't start.

maeday2 · February 2015

Sorry Novella!

Stupid senseless worrying is my hobby too.

Our caterer packs up extra food for the B&G too and I've been worried we won't have enough time to eat it before flying out in the morning. Pretty sure I'll be eating bacon wrapped duck at 6 a.m. because bacon is breakfast food.

I'm avoiding work, but that's nothing new.

novella1186 · February 2015

maeday2 said:

Sorry Novella!

Stupid senseless worrying is my hobby too.

Our caterer packs up extra food for the B&G too and I've been worried we won't have enough time to eat it before flying out in the morning. Pretty sure I'll be eating bacon wrapped duck at 6 a.m. because bacon is breakfast food.

I'm avoiding work, but that's nothing new.

omg bacon-wrapped duck? Drooling now. I just thought for a second that maybe I will crash your wedding, but then I'd have to miss mine lol.

levioosa · February 2015

I have an embarrassing amount of tea under my desk. I was definitely born in the wrong country. Sadly, Earl Grey has never tasted right to me.

mikenberger · February 2015

Avoiding work by:

- Personalized stamps for the invites

- Ridiculously gaudy envelopes for the invites

- Communicating with the printer to print the invites

- Personalized stamps for the RSVPs

- Updating the wedding budget in my budgeter on TK

- Crying over the budget and my no forethought on postage

- Texting my friend over "Why did you remind me about postage?!"

- Typing all this out

- Looking at food options for lunch

novella1186 · February 2015

It makes me feel way less guilty to know that other people are avoiding work too :P

levioosa · February 2015

Does anyone else procrastinate by making elaborate meal plans to eat super healthy that they immediately abandon later? Because I feel like that is my life.

princessleia22 · February 2015

Sorry to hear about your friends. On the other hand, with all they are going through, they may all want a fun night out where they can put their troubles aside and not think about the horrible problems in life. Sometimes just getting out and letting it all go for a night is the best thing.

Different scenario, but similar principal... Several years ago we had an OOT bachelorette party planned for my best friend (I was MOH). I had to have major surgery about a month before her wedding, but I was expected to be well enough to attend her party. Well, I got a major infection and ended up back in surgery. I was discharged from the hospital 3 days before the party (and I still had a PICC line for IV meds). She wanted to cancel the whole thing, but I wouldn't allow it. So, we changed plans and just stayed in town, but we all had a great time. Of course, I couldn't drink and I did leave early, but after all that I had been through I needed some mindless fun and to feel normal for a bit. Your friends could probably use a mindless night out after all that stress.

I have a stupid project that was supposed to be done yesterday and I just can't find the motivation to finish it or concentrate on it. And all week long I've had people hounding me about another project... literally calling me every hour or two asking about project status for 3 days straight (I had 11 phone calls yesterday asking about status of this project... from only 3 people). And the status was something that was out of my control and there was little I could do to resolve it. So, those constant interruptions are part of the reason I'm running late on this current project. And it all has me so frustrated that I just want to lay in bed and do nothing. So, I'm wasting time on TK instead of working on the stuff that really needs to be done.

Inkdancer · February 2015

Sounds to me like these ladies really need a party to take their minds off stuff. Even if it turns into just sitting in your house drinking wine and bitching, don't cancel.

I should be cleaning my office or working on my novel. Instead I am cuddling Kitten, because Kitten is the cutest.

novella1186 · February 2015

levioosa said:

Does anyone else procrastinate by making elaborate meal plans to eat super healthy that they immediately abandon later? Because I feel like that is my life.

I once spent an entire morning at work looking up vegan recipes, tofu recipes, raw veggie recipes, Mediterranean diet recipes-- not for the purpose of starting a full-on diet or style of eating, but just to have a few healthy recipes in my arsenal to eat healthier in general-- and I haven't made any of them so far. This was like a year ago.

levioosa · February 2015

novella1186 said:

levioosa said:

Does anyone else procrastinate by making elaborate meal plans to eat super healthy that they immediately abandon later? Because I feel like that is my life.

I once spent an entire morning at work looking up vegan recipes, tofu recipes, raw veggie recipes, Mediterranean diet recipes-- not for the purpose of starting a full-on diet or style of eating, but just to have a few healthy recipes in my arsenal to eat healthier in general-- and I haven't made any of them so far. This was like a year ago.

I keep telling myself I'm going to cut out the dairy, processed sugar, and wheat/bread (at my doctor's request--not for fad dieting reasons), and then I open my fridge and see that SO just bought another giant block of extra sharp cheddar cheese and I think, "Well now, that's just too much quality cheese to waste."

classicalandedgy · February 2015

Sorry to hear about your friends, I hope things start to get better for them.

I'm knotting right now while at work too... Totally avoiding any and all work. I'm sick of the snow here... Arrgh

princessleia22 · February 2015

levioosa said:

novella1186 said:

levioosa said:

Does anyone else procrastinate by making elaborate meal plans to eat super healthy that they immediately abandon later? Because I feel like that is my life.

I once spent an entire morning at work looking up vegan recipes, tofu recipes, raw veggie recipes, Mediterranean diet recipes-- not for the purpose of starting a full-on diet or style of eating, but just to have a few healthy recipes in my arsenal to eat healthier in general-- and I haven't made any of them so far. This was like a year ago.

I keep telling myself I'm going to cut out the dairy, processed sugar, and wheat/bread (at my doctor's request--not for fad dieting reasons), and then I open my fridge and see that SO just bought another giant block of extra sharp cheddar cheese and I think, "Well now, that's just too much quality cheese to waste."

I've been trying to eat healthier and have spend a fair amount of time looking at recipes... none of which have actually been made yet. Although, I have finally branched out and realized I can enjoy a salad that isn't drenched in ranch dressing, bacon, and cheese. I've also been thinking about trying to reduce wheat/gluten, because I do have symptoms that may suggest intolerance and I have other medical condition that they are now finding high percentage of celiac patients, so there is evidence of possible link to the condition to make me higher risk of it. But, then DH has bagels sitting on the counter. Or I see some really yummy looking wheat bread. Or some other awesome food calling out to me. I have yet to go even one day without wheat/gluten products. At this point I think I may just wait a couple months until my yearly physical and have the doctor test me for it, instead of doing my own elimination testing. Why give up yummy foods until I absolutely know I need to? I also have long suspected lactose intolerance, but I would rather suffer the indigestion than give up my chai lattes or ice cream. And going both lactose and gluten free just seems so wrong that I can't even imagine life having any meaning. It's all about priorities and chai latte and mint chocolate chip ice cream definitely take priority over health.

[Deleted User] · February 2015

On Tuesday the GM of a business unit I support went to a meeting at our parent company. He was asked to present on "pain points" in recruiting.

The fact that my company pays shit is a pain point. I noted such, with documentation showing that in a random sampling of 6 locations we have sites, we start employees at a salary that is between $2.50 and $3.60 UNDER what they are looking to make (hourly employees remember, so in their world, a 50 cent raise is a big deal...), and therefore when we interview them and discuss salary, they laugh and hang up on us (I've had it happen 3 times in 18 months!).

My boss told me today that I am no longer allowed to "complain" about our salary structure b/c the GM's / higher ups don't care and they just see it as me making excuses for why I can't hire.

Okay. So apparently evidence / facts are now excuses. And now I know my company is going to stick its head in the sand and go on pretending that this isn't a valid issue that should be discussed / reviewed.

And that's when my motivation died.

ETA: We have 86 hourly roles open in that business unit. EIGHTY... SIX... but let's just pretend that we pay people enough money to attract people to our business.

ETAA: Oh, and a turnover rate of 27% for the last 2 years, and the fact that of the terminations we had in 2014, 68% of them were terminations in the first year of employment; over 70% of which were VOLUNTARY terminations (not us firing people).

OKAY. I'm no [redacted for language] business expert, but I'd say we have a problem.

novella1186 · February 2015

FeeleyToBe said:

On Tuesday the GM of a business unit I support went to a meeting at our parent company. He was asked to present on "pain points" in recruiting.

The fact that my company pays shit is a pain point. I noted such, with documentation showing that in a random sampling of 6 locations we have sites, we start employees at a salary that is between $2.50 and $3.60 UNDER what they are looking to make (hourly employees remember, so in their world, a 50 cent raise is a big deal...), and therefore when we interview them and discuss salary, they laugh and hang up on us (I've had it happen 3 times in 18 months!).

My boss told me today that I am no longer allowed to "complain" about our salary structure b/c the GM's / higher ups don't care and they just see it as me making excuses for why I can't hire.

Okay. So apparently evidence / facts are now excuses. And now I know my company is going to stick its head in the sand and go on pretending that this isn't a valid issue that should be discussed / reviewed.

And that's when my motivation died.

ETA: We have 86 hourly roles open in that business unit. EIGHTY... SIX... but let's just pretend that we pay people enough money to attract people to our business.

ETAA: Oh, and a turnover rate of 27% for the last 2 years, and the fact that of the terminations we had in 2014, 68% of them were terminations in the first year of employment; over 70% of which were VOLUNTARY terminations (not us firing people).

OKAY. I'm no [redacted for language] business expert, but I'd say we have a problem.

To the bolded: WTF?! What a douche!!!

If they won't budge on the pay issue, though, you might want to look into other factors. Our company pays less than our major competitor who is literally just down the road from us, but people leave them to come to us because we're known for having a really awesome culture, being very laid-back, and treating employees well. I know I could get paid more if I went to them, but I don't really want to be treated like crap and be in such an uptight high-stress culture.

If you google wide-scale surveys in which employees rank what's most important in a job, pay is usually 3rd or 4th on the list.

However, it's definitely an important factor, and definitely a deciding factor for a lot of people. If I'm getting paid less then there damn well better be other HUGE reasons for me to stay. It sucks that your company just chooses to ignore the issue. And it sucks worse that your boss decided to be a total dick about it.

falsara · February 2015

I'm so sorry to hear about what your girls are going through. I hope things get better, I also agree with PPs that they might need a night of booze and fun, just to feel like the world is still turning.

I am knotting while in my Crime in Victorian Literature class. I am avoiding this whole day.

I could be tweaking the PowerPoint for the group presentation on Monday.

I could be writing the 750 word paper, and grading rubric that goes with presentation.

I could also be writing my non-fiction piece for my Capstone class

I could also be picking a book for my publishing presentation in my small press internship.

I could be meal planning for next week/ my weekend grocery trip

I could be making a ToDo list of all the things that I need to do when I get home today, including cleaning, and the above homework.

Instead of doing any of this I am Knotting.

I choose to avoid anything productive today

levioosa · February 2015

FeeleyToBe said:

On Tuesday the GM of a business unit I support went to a meeting at our parent company. He was asked to present on "pain points" in recruiting.

The fact that my company pays shit is a pain point. I noted such, with documentation showing that in a random sampling of 6 locations we have sites, we start employees at a salary that is between $2.50 and $3.60 UNDER what they are looking to make (hourly employees remember, so in their world, a 50 cent raise is a big deal...), and therefore when we interview them and discuss salary, they laugh and hang up on us (I've had it happen 3 times in 18 months!).

My boss told me today that I am no longer allowed to "complain" about our salary structure b/c the GM's / higher ups don't care and they just see it as me making excuses for why I can't hire.

Okay. So apparently evidence / facts are now excuses. And now I know my company is going to stick its head in the sand and go on pretending that this isn't a valid issue that should be discussed / reviewed.

And that's when my motivation died.

ETA: We have 86 hourly roles open in that business unit. EIGHTY... SIX... but let's just pretend that we pay people enough money to attract people to our business.

ETAA: Oh, and a turnover rate of 27% for the last 2 years, and the fact that of the terminations we had in 2014, 68% of them were terminations in the first year of employment; over 70% of which were VOLUNTARY terminations (not us firing people).

OKAY. I'm no [redacted for language] business expert, but I'd say we have a problem.

This is EXACTLY the problem SO is having at work right now. Boss is complaining that they don't have enough/quality workers and everyone is too slow, but yet he pays them all peanuts. People leave the second they find a higher paying job (which isn't hard--pretty much every job in the field is higher paying than what they're making). The people who stay lack the experience/education for the job and are pretty poor workers. I feel so bad for him. He's constantly getting chewed out by his boss for not having more employees. It's so bad that even college students in the field don't want it. That's when you know it's super shitty pay.

hellosweetie1015 · February 2015

I am avoiding filing. I hate filing. I want a filing robot.

I agree with the couple of other PPs who say don't cancel. If you want to, maybe restructure so it's a calmer sort of shendig, but absolutely don't cancel. Give your girls a chance to decide if they want to party. You might be surprised - something to take their mind off of the rest of life and let them be goofs and have some fun. So much serious stuff going on in their lives, they probably would love to have a couple hours' goof-off time.

mrscomposer · February 2015

falsara said:

I'm so sorry to hear about what your girls are going through. I hope things get better, I also agree with PPs that they might need a night of booze and fun, just to feel like the world is still turning.
I am knotting while in my Crime in Victorian Literature class. I am avoiding this whole day.
I could be tweaking the PowerPoint for the group presentation on Monday.
I could be writing the 750 word paper, and grading rubric that goes with presentation.
I could also be writing my non-fiction piece for my Capstone class
I could also be picking a book for my publishing presentation in my small press internship.
I could be meal planning for next week/ my weekend grocery trip
I could be making a ToDo list of all the things that I need to do when I get home today, including cleaning, and the above homework.
Instead of doing any of this I am Knotting.
I choose to avoid anything productive today

Oh goooooooooooooooooddddddddddd do I want your day.

I miss the way my brain felt when I was in school. I feel so dull and flat now, and I used to feel smart. I used to BE smart. And now I just pull people over and try not to punch them when they give me lip for speeding (kiddingnotkidding).

@hellosweetie1015, I'd even be your filing robot. I LOVE filing.

And Novella - just let it be their choice to attend or not... I know if I was in their situation, I'd go by how I was feeling that day. And I may just come out for part of it. But I would feel horrible if you cancelled because of what was going on in my life.

hellosweetie1015 · February 2015

mrscomposer said:

falsara said:

I'm so sorry to hear about what your girls are going through. I hope things get better, I also agree with PPs that they might need a night of booze and fun, just to feel like the world is still turning.
I am knotting while in my Crime in Victorian Literature class. I am avoiding this whole day.
I could be tweaking the PowerPoint for the group presentation on Monday.
I could be writing the 750 word paper, and grading rubric that goes with presentation.
I could also be writing my non-fiction piece for my Capstone class
I could also be picking a book for my publishing presentation in my small press internship.
I could be meal planning for next week/ my weekend grocery trip
I could be making a ToDo list of all the things that I need to do when I get home today, including cleaning, and the above homework.
Instead of doing any of this I am Knotting.
I choose to avoid anything productive today

Oh goooooooooooooooooddddddddddd do I want your day.

I miss the way my brain felt when I was in school. I feel so dull and flat now, and I used to feel smart. I used to BE smart. And now I just pull people over and try not to punch them when they give me lip for speeding (kiddingnotkidding).

hellosweetie1015, I'd even be your filing robot. I LOVE filing.

And Novella - just let it be their choice to attend or not... I know if I was in their situation, I'd go by how I was feeling that day. And I may just come out for part of it. But I would feel horrible if you cancelled because of what was going on in my life.

Box oxbow

PLEASE. I have a ton of it to do, even though I JUST DID IT THIS MORNING. It's mindless and tedious and hands down the worst part of my day, including the lack of naptime.

falsara · February 2015

@mrscomposer‌ I'm sure once I'm graduated I'll feel that way but I have a super case of senioritis. I graduate in December so at this point I'm just done with school, especially since I also work at the university, so I can never really get away. Most of all I'm just tired of having crap to do when I get home.

I do feel you on the pulling people over. Dad's a cop in a smallish college town. Whenever I need to hear about ridiculous people I call him and ask him how his week was.

And that is when my motivation died.

Re: And that is when my motivation died.

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