Moms and Maids

Bridesmaid dress question

I've just started planning and am hearing different things about the bridesmaid dresses (including Matron of Honor and Maid of Honor).

Who pays for the dresses the bride or each bridesmaid?
TIA :) 

Re: Bridesmaid dress question

  • Typically it is the responsibility of the attendants to purchase the attire.  However, it is the brides job to ask each attendant individually what their budget is for the dress.  Now, if you can afford to purchase dresses for every BM then that is awesome and I am sure would be very much appreciated by your BMs.  You should also take into account each persons comfort level with the type of dress you decide on.  For example if a person is very uncomfortable wearing strapless then be open to changing the dress style around OR picking 3 dresses of varying styles and let your BMs pick their favorite.

    If you don't want to deal with the whole dress picking stress, you can just tell your BMs to buy a dress in X color, Y length and Z fabric.

    Finally, anything like shoes and jewelry should really just be left up to the BM to pick out.  But if you feel the need to dictate these items then it is your responsibility to pay for it.

  • libride2015libride2015 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited February 2015
    I just went this weekend with my BM's to get their dresses. We went in with a plan that they werent going to spend anymore than $250 and knew the color was a plum... 

    They knew I wanted them to all be in the same dress - but I was not going top pick it, I wanted all of them to be equally happy, they all have the same taste/style so I knew it would be okay. In the end we ended up finding a dress that EVERYONE, including my grandmother is inlove with :).... I love it when that happens, and was $189.... so way less then they needed to spend! 

    But usually, when you sign on to be a bridesmaid, you sign on to the responsibility to you are going to buy a dress (obviously within your budget). 

    One of my best friends is in 3 weddings this year, including mine, that can become financially straining, when the last girl asked her, she didnt want to let her down, but told her the only thing she would be buying was the dress, no hair, no makeup, and wouldn't be able to help with the bachlorette party but she would still love to stand up next to her that day... 

    If you really want them there, but financially they cannot make ends meet, that is where I would chip in, like my Fiances best friend/Best Man, we are paying for his hotel, and possibly his tux rental, because there is no one else he rather have next to him then the guy that has always been there for him, he just doesnt have the fiancial resources! 
  • Each BM is responsible for the cost of her own dress.BUT, the bride is responsible for asking each BM (in private) for her budget ahead of time. Then shopping under the lowest budget. 
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  • The BM is responsible for the cost of the dress only (that means you can't dictate shoes, hair, makeup, nails, etc without paying for it).  You should ask each of your BMs privately what their budget is, and then stick to the lowest budget while keeping in mind any alterations that might need to be done.  


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  • The bridesmaids pay for their own attire.  You have the responsibility of picking a dress within the budget that they gave you.  My advice would be to select a dress below their budget as to leave room for alterations that most of the time are needed.  As for accessories you can "suggest" the color shoe or any other accessories but unless you are willing to pay for them they are under no obligation to actually buy these items.  However, I would select a shoe color that most of the girls already have so that they won't need to purchase another pair if they really cannot afford it.
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  • Also, as far as jewelry, whatever you buy for them to wear on the day of your wedding isn't considered "a gift".



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