Wedding Woes

O-face, c'mere about that

My question first off is why is your friend wanting to peep them?

Re: O-face, c'mere about that

  • 0Face0Face member
    Tenth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    Insecurity and internal strife.  How's about that?
  • The only time I think that it's okay is if you suspect some sort of affair/cheating.  

    Anything else, you're giving into feelings that while they might be justified or what you're feeling, don't give you rights to violate someone's personal privacy.
    0Face
  • And it's not that it's really OK, but more about self-preservation so you can decide what you want to do about that.
  • 0Face0Face member
    Tenth Anniversary 250 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    I agree 100%.  Breach of trust, all of that.
  • meh.

    dh and i go through each other's texts and phones. but we have mutual consent, so there's that.

    for those who want to know why -- i handle craigslists sales, but dh is the one with the account, so i have to answer his email. i am listed as the contact for daycare, so all the bills come to me, but dh needs them to file for reimbursement. we are just lazy like that.

    image
  • DH and I also go through each other's phones, e-mails, FB messages.  He'll ask me to look up stuff in his e-mail all the time.  All the stuff on the iPad is registered to me and my accounts (FB, email, apps, etc), so he has access to it if he's using the iPad.  The phones not as much, but if he picked up my phone and I his, neither of us would bat an eye. 
  • I check H's emails all the time, just because he hardly ever does and sometimes misses stuff he should look at.  I also am on his FB sometimes because he never remembers to sign out, if I thought he was cheating or lying I admit I'd probably look.
  • All the stuff on the iPad is registered to me and my accounts (FB, email, apps, etc), so he has access to it if he's using the iPad.  The phones not as much, but if he picked up my phone and I his, neither of us would bat an eye. 

    This, except reversed:  the iPad is on his AppleID, so if I'm on the iPad I have access to his texts, FB, email, etc.  I occasionally have to find something in his email (Y account info, home warranty info), but otherwise I don't really have occasion to peek.

    We use each other's phones constantly--if we need to check weather or order Chinese, we just use whichever one is handy.
  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited April 2015
    I'm probably signed in to DK's Facebook and e-mail more than he is.  (as an example of this, when he threw me a surprise party for my 30th birthday, he set up a new, secret e-mail account so i wouldn't see anything about the party)

    I don't use his phone as often (because i normally have mine, and mine's better), but I know the password, and he doesn't have any issues with me using it. His phone also was a lot more limited until ~6 months ago (it is company issued with a crazy firewall, so he didn't really have access to FB or a lot of apps). I doubt he'd use his phone for anything shady since his company could easily pull all of the records/texts/emails/etc. if need be. 

    if "your friend" thinks there's something shady going on, i guess i'd have to wonder why she feels that way, and how strong that feeling is.  i would see it a bigger concern if her husband considered her looking at his phone as a violation of trust or some such. if he has nothing to hide, why is it a big deal? checking texts/e-mails is a lot cheaper than hiring a PI, so i'd tell her to go for it if she's that worried, and he's given her reason to distrust him.

    I set up most of the online bill pays, banking accounts, etc. because he never remembers his user name or password, and it's a hassle when i need to get on and look something up.  
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