My wife found my CL fantasy cheating page
My wife and I have been married for years. While things have not always been perfect, we’ve always managed to be a good team, seeing challenges through together. One such challenge was relocating frequently, and a little over a year ago, I started using the “strictly platonic” section of Craigslist to try and meet couples, looking for friends since we’d finally settled in one area. That lead to my falling down a Craigslist rabbit hole where I would talk with women looking for sexual hookups, sometimes even arranging to meet, then canceling at the last second. I kept this hidden from my wife and, frankly, from myself. I found justifications for creating a fictional, less repressed, more attractive version of myself who could live out fantasies I was ashamed to admit I had. Then I forgot to log out of the dummy email account I used and my wife found everything, including some less-than-flattering descriptions of my fictional self’s fictional wife. I deleted the account, stopped all of that type of interaction, and am in counseling for this maladaptive compulsion. I know I’ve battered my wife’s trust and deeply hurt her feelings, even though she intellectually understands that none of my behavior had anything to do with her. How do I repair the damage from this indiscretion, and get things back on track, given that that’s what we both want?