August 2016 Weddings

Matron of Honor dislikes my date

My fiance and I chose a mid week wedding Aug 17, because all of his family has to travel.  So we did our research and flights are cheaper mid week. This would let them Fly in on Tuesday and out on Thursday and miss the weekend price bump.  Also we got a great deal on our venue because it would have been empty otherwise. 

I've been designing my save the dates and my maid of honor asked what the date was.  I told her Aug 17, 2016.  She responds back say that she doesn't think that will work for her because her husband works (apparently I don't?) and she MAY be taking summer classes.

Am I really supposed to change my date for her?  Or should she be more flexible?  Since she's my older sister can i play the "its my wedding and I can date it like I want to" card?

Re: Matron of Honor dislikes my date

  • I've seen a lot of varying opinions about wedding stuff, but here's mine on this:

    First, I've been the MOH for a wedding when the date wasn't great for me either. It was the peak of my then boyfriend/now fiance's work schedule (he's a bartender and plays in a wedding band), plus I knew I'd have a lot going on with some personal/work things that time of year. And, this wasn't a local wedding, so we had to travel about 6 hours (so nothing crazy). But, my fiance and I moved things around the ensure we could be there (and I could fulfill all MOH duties). Because, this was her wedding.

    I've had one thing drilled into my head by older friends/family, this is your wedding. No one else's. You are the BRIDE and your fiance is the GROOM. Therefore, you two are the only one's that really need to agree on wedding related topics.*

    So, unless the rest of your family seems to dislike the date, then I don't think you need to change your date just for her. Especially since she's your sister. And, you're giving her a 1+ year notice.

    *And yes, I know sometimes you need to change small things for mom/dad/in-laws/bridal party, but not something as big as the date.
  • Did you talk to your VIPs about the date? I consulted with the person who is going to be my MOH because she is out of the country and will only be back for 6 weeks next summer. I basically picked my wedding date around her availability. It's common courtesy to check with the people who you would like to be at your wedding whether they can actually attend. 

    You are HOSTING the wedding. It is for your guests. If you don't care about their comfort, don't have guests and elope.
  • We're getting married the week before you. And Between the two dates, my MOH's husband could make either, But she was still okay with us getting married on that date...I would say you gave her plenty of notice.
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