Dear Prudence,
There’s a summer internship I’m really interested in at an LGBT archive near my parents’ house (I’m in college). Thing is, I’m not really out to my parents. I sort of broached the subject with my mother a few years ago but she didn’t react well and we never mentioned it again (she never told my dad). Both of my parents are non-homophobic in theory (they never use slurs or condone other people’s homophobia) but I guess her daughter being gay hit too close to home. I don’t think they’d kick me out or withdraw financial support, but coming out would be awkward and uncomfortable. I could probably find an apartment for the summer but given how close they are to the archive, that seems like a waste of money and I’d still feel obligated to tell them what I’m doing, so the only problem that would solve is giving me some space.
I hate the idea of not applying to a program that I’m really excited about just because I don’t want to deal with coming out. If I got the job, not telling them about it isn’t really realistic. I’m out to my brother, who’s pretty supportive and (as far as I know) will also be home this summer. I guess the subtext of all of this is that I’m pissed that my parents, who pride themselves on being so progressive and liberal, wouldn’t be happy with my being gay.