Wedding Party

FSIL groomswoman issues

I've been lurking on the knot throughout my planning, but wanted to get your opinion on this because there doesn't seem to actually be much about groomswomen on here, just people giving it as an alternative to having your FSIL on your side.  I am not close to FSIL, but I have one sister who is my MOH and FI has one brother who is his best man, so if we didn't put FSIL in the WP, she'd be the only sibling who wasn't, and we felt that would hurt her and maybe look bad to our guests.  

So I asked her to be a groomswoman and now that we are shopping for attire, I seriously regret it. I want her to be comfortable and so I am encouraging her input, but FSIL absolutely hates groomswoman attire, it seems.  Simple black shift dress with a silver or pink sash to match the groomsmen's suits and the wedding colors, black pantsuit with pink or silver blouse underneath, she doesn't seem to like any of the options I like.  I have a feeling she's fishing to wear the BM dress (pink with silver accents), which wouldn't surprise me as she is a very feminine, girly person, but I don't want people to mistake her for a BM.  She is a groomswoman.  

Is there any solution other than letting her wear the BM dress or being draconian and prescribing what I want?  Help appreciated from those who have actually gone the groomswoman route.
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Re: FSIL groomswoman issues

  • If she doesn't want to wear black, maybe she can wear silver?

    For us, we had the bride's attendants in black and the groom's attendants in white, so the idea for the groomswoman was that she'd wear silver.  So then she came to me all excited because she'd found her dress: silver bodice with a black skirt, so it looked mostly black.  It wasn't what I would have chosen and if she hadn't already bought it I might have suggested that she keep looking, but she had already paid so I went with it.  It worked out fine, and if anyone thought she was supposed to be a bridesmaid instead, I didn't hear about it.  Really, what's the worst that happens if someone thinks she's a bridesmaid instead of a groomswoman? 
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • The guys are wearing black tuxes, and I'd much rather things look as uniform as possible on that side - I worry that having her in a color other than black will make her stand out too much.  Yes, I realize this is a bit bridezilla of me!  I just wish she'd be a little more flexible about wearing a black dress or a black pantsuit.  

    I'd rather go with silver if it'll prevent a fight, though!  Thanks for your input.  And I realize it's not the end of the world if people think she's a BM - if all else fails, I will let her wear the BM dress to keep the peace.  I did want that to be kind of a special dress for the people closest to me, and FSIL is not very close to me, know what I mean?
  • She also doesn't need to be in a simple shift dress or pant suit. She can pick just about any dress that's basic black and add the sash and look fabulous. Whether it's A-line, v-neck, strappless, long, short, whatever. No one would confuse her for a BM. And if she chooses a different pink dress, that'd be fine too. What about using what pp said and do a silver dress, or pink/silver or pink/black dress? I think you need to loosen up a bit on what a groomswoman wears, because it really can be anything.
    "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"
  • I like the idea of a pink and black dress!  That might satisfy both of us.
  • Honestly if you can't find something else that she likes, I would let her wear the BM dress. She will be standing on FI's side and her name will be listed in the program (if you have one) as one of his attendants. I don't think anyone will confuse her for a BM.


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  • StageManager, I think you're misunderstanding.  I don't think it'll "take attention away from me," I just like the way things look in a wedding when they all coordinate nicely.  If I was worried about only wanting attention on me, I certainly would not have even entertained the idea of a groomswoman, I've seen tons of women on these boards reject the groomswoman concept based on aesthetics and thinking it would be "distracting."  I just want the side that is meant to be dressed primarily in black to be dressed primarily in black, and the side that is meant to be dressed primarily in pink to be dressed primarily in pink.  

    I am not worried about people not knowing she's on the groom's side during the ceremony.  I want to make sure the distinction is still there at the reception.  Thank you for your response.
  • The Knot ate my reply.  StageManager, I am not saying that having FSIL in a color other than black will take away from me, I am saying it won't look uniform on the groom's side and that is the look I am going for.  It isn't to make sure no one is looking at anything but me.  I don't appreciate you calling me petty and immature for wanting to make sure my wedding looks coordinated and I think my expectations for FSIL's attire are reasonable.

    Thanks for everyone's responses.  I plan to go shopping again with FSIL next weekend and I will run the idea of a pink and black dress by her.
  • runpipparunrunpipparun member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:2a2f6308-8743-406c-8f5f-a256068809b2">Re:FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]There is no such thing as "groom's woman" clothing. She can wear a BM dress or a black dress of any kind, it doesn't have to be a "simple shift". Heck, she can wear the BM drss in black or a different dress in the BM color, or a dress in another of your wedding colors that the BMs aren't wearing. People will know she's with the grooms side because she'll be, you know, standingon the groom's side. <strong>ETA:  and yes, we had two groomswomen as well as a bridesman and a man of honor.  The girls all wore the same colors, they guys wore the same tuxes</strong> and there was no confusion about who went with whom.  <strong>Honestly, saying you're worried she'll "stick out too much" is pretty petty and immature.</strong>  It makes it sound like you're worried she will take attention away from you.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]<div>
    </div><div>We're doing the same. 
    </div><div>
    </div><div>I agree with Stage, OP. It does make you sound superficial. You care more about the "look" you are going for than your FSIL's feelings. That's what makes you sound petty and immature.</div><div>
    </div><div>Edited to correct to FSIL.</div>
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  • How about the black version of your BM dress?  Maybe add a pink sash or something?
  • pinkandsilverpinkandsilver member
    First Comment
    edited July 2012
    The fact that I want FSIL to incorporate black into her outfit so she matches the tuxes means I'm being insensitive to her feelings?  Good grief.  If we were really talking insensitive, I'd just do what I want, which is dictate that she wear a black shift dress.  Am I being a little bridezillaish in wanting some control over the way my bridal party looks?  Yes, and I've acknowledged that.  But I am also taking FSIL's feelings into consideration by not forcing her to wear something she hates and trying to find a middle ground where FSIL is comfortable and I am, too.
  • aragx6aragx6 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Why do you even get to have any opinion whatsoever about the attire of your FI's side?
    Lizzie
  • pinkandsilverpinkandsilver member
    First Comment
    edited July 2012
    Aragx6, he isn't interested in going dress shopping with his sister.  Would your FI be?  

    And he did decide that he wanted his guys in black tuxes.  That is why I brought up the idea that black would be a good idea for FSIL too, and he agreed and suggested I go shopping with her and let me take it from there.

    Anyway, thank you for some of the genuinely helpful advice I've gotten here - I am looking forward to finding a silver and black or pink and black dress with FSIL.  
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:d95dbd78-2165-4655-8c31-9060c5e77b98">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]The fact that I want FSIL to incorporate black into her outfit so she matches the tuxes means I'm being insensitive to her feelings?  Good grief.  If we were really talking insensitive, I'd just do what I want, which is dictate that she wear a black shift dress.  Am I being a little bridezillaish in wanting some control over the way my bridal party looks?  Yes, and I've acknowledged that.  But I am also taking FSIL's feelings into consideration by not forcing her to wear something she hates and trying to find a middle ground where FSIL is comfortable and I am, too.
    Posted by pinkandsilver[/QUOTE]

    <div>You keep aknowledging that you are being a bridezilla like that makes it ok. It doesn't. Find something she is comfortable wearing and stop acting like it will be a huge insult if people think she is a bridesmaid.</div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:58b95f41-4e4e-457b-a230-55898d3d60ae">FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]I've been lurking on the knot throughout my planning, but wanted to get your opinion on this because there doesn't seem to actually be much about groomswomen on here, just people giving it as an alternative to having your FSIL on your side.  I am not close to FSIL, but I have one sister who is my MOH and FI has one brother who is his best man, so if we didn't put FSIL in the WP, she'd be the only sibling who wasn't, and we felt that would hurt her and maybe look bad to our guests.   <strong>So I asked her to be a groomswoman</strong> and now that we are shopping for attire, I seriously regret it. I want her to be comfortable and so I am encouraging her input, but FSIL absolutely hates groomswoman attire, it seems.  Simple black shift dress with a silver or pink sash to match the groomsmen's suits and the wedding colors, black pantsuit with pink or silver blouse underneath, she doesn't seem to like any of the options I like.  I have a feeling she's fishing to wear the BM dress (pink with silver accents), which wouldn't surprise me as she is a very feminine, girly person, but I don't want people to mistake her for a BM.  She is a groomswoman.   Is there any solution other than letting her wear the BM dress or being draconian and prescribing what I want?  Help appreciated from those who have actually gone the groomswoman route.
    Posted by pinkandsilver[/QUOTE]

    This is where I got stuck. Why didn't your FI -- her brother -- ask her?
  • runpipparunrunpipparun member
    5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:58b95f41-4e4e-457b-a230-55898d3d60ae">FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]I've been lurking on the knot throughout my planning, but wanted to get your opinion on this because there doesn't seem to actually be much about groomswomen on here, just people giving it as an alternative to having your FSIL on your side.  I am not close to FSIL, but I have one sister who is my MOH and FI has one brother who is his best man, so if we didn't put FSIL in the WP, <strong>she'd be the only sibling who wasn't, and we felt that would hurt her and maybe look bad to our guests.   So I asked her to be a groomswoman and now that we are shopping for attire, I seriously regret it. I want her to be comfortable and so I am encouraging her input, but FSIL absolutely hates groomswoman attire, it seems.  Simple black shift dress with a silver or pink sash to match the groomsmen's suits and the wedding colors, black pantsuit with pink or silver blouse underneath, she doesn't seem to like any of the options I like.  I have a feeling she's fishing to wear the BM dress (pink with silver accents), which wouldn't surprise me as she is a very feminine, girly person, but I don't want people to mistake her for a BM.  She is a groomswoman. </strong>  Is there any solution other than letting her wear the BM dress or being draconian and prescribing what I want?  Help appreciated from those who have actually gone the groomswoman route.
    Posted by pinkandsilver[/QUOTE]

    <div>You asked her, not because either of you was close to her, but so that YOU wouldn't look bad. That's crappy. People aren't props, yo. Honestly, I feel this is the root of the problem.</div><div>
    </div><div>Now you regret asking her because she doesn't want to wear a pantsuit. Well, I wouldn't either. You think she doesn't know that you don't want her from the way you are acting re: her attire? What man of honor has ever been asked to wear a dress? Or a suit that matches the bridesmaid's dresses? None. Bridesmen always stick out.</div><div>
    </div><div>You said she is a girly girl, but you don't want people to mistake her for a BM, so you want to make her fit in with the dudes. Ergo, you are going to dress her in attire she is NOT comfortable in, like a pantsuit or something less feminine?! Good grief, if my brother suggested I wear a pantsuit, I'd tell him to find another attendant. That is insensitive. Again, you are treating her like a prop.</div><div>
    </div><div>If she were your close friend or your FI's best friend, and you actually wanted her in your wedding party, would you work harder to compromise and find something she actually liked, or would you be still bound and determined to stick her in a pantsuit or something she disliked equally? That's the question you should be asking yourself.</div>
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  • ems27ems27 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    pinkandsilver actually isn't being bridezilla-ish at all.  What are the two requirements for bridesmaids/groomsmen?  Wear the dress/tux and show up on the day of.  So what if she wants the sides to look balanced?  I'd probably be a bit pissed if one of the groomsmen decided to get himself a hot pink tux instead of whatever color FI decides on.  If FSIL agreed to stand on FI's side, she can go with the colors FI wanted.

    She's being completely reasonable and modifying her vision so that FSIL isn't stuck in something she hates- but that doesn't mean that pinkandsilver has to hate what FSIL is going to be wearing.  She's getting a common ground here, which is completely reasonable. People shouldn't agree to be in a wedding if they don't want some direction as to what they will be wearing; they should just be a guest so they can wear whatever they want. 

    pinkandsilver, good luck shopping with FSIL and let us know what you end up finding!
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  • ems27ems27 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:087d1b03-a40d-4098-97ab-e518b1d6a2db">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]What man of honor has ever been asked to wear a dress? Or a suit that matches the bridesmaid's dresses? None. Bridesmen always stick out. Posted by runpipparun[/QUOTE]

    Say Yes to the Dress Bridesmaids- it's happened!

    And pinkandsilver has decided on a compromise- instead of a pantsuit or shift, they are going to go look for a black/pink or black/silver dress that FSIL is happy with.  I think that a bride compromising with me would show me that she cares about me, my happiness, and my presence in the wedding.
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  • My FSIL are wearing these.. they have a suit feel but the bottoms will be the same color as the bridesmaids.. just an idea. This is what they came up with, I found that when it was their idea they were very excited about wearing it, verses me putting them in something I wanted..

    http://www.alfredangelo.com/collections/productdisplay.aspx?productID=a8c59e51-eb30-4a94-bef1-06ca00cecc84&categoryID=772f03c9-de43-4942-bfa0-da77e21ebd65&pg=0&colorId1=

    http://www.alfredangelo.com/collections/productdisplay.aspx?productID=4a73223c-c512-49b5-9218-f80602e385cf&categoryID=772f03c9-de43-4942-bfa0-da77e21ebd65&pg=0&colorId1=
  • The other thing to remember is that she's going to stick out more, both in person and in pictures, being visibly uncomfortable in a nicely coordinated dress that she hates, than she will if she's wearing something dissimilar than the other groom's attendants. 
    This is a neglected planning bio.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:4a84500a-1ea2-4c2e-91bf-28c9812d6e43">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : It's not so much a color issue as a "you're standing on the side with the penises, so you're not allowed to look as pretty and feminine as the other girls" issue.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    And even if OP's not meaning it to come across that way, it seems like that's how the FSIL is taking it, especially given that the styles that OP describes all sound pretty frumpy.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • ems27ems27 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:5ba83b77-1c64-41e9-9d8e-82fb4510f970">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : Exactly.  I could see asking FSIL to compromise on a black dress with color added, but the fact that OP was specifically describing "groomswoman clothes" as plain black shift dresses (which I wouldn't wear to my OFFICE, let alone a wedding) and pantsuits gives the impression that she's trying to make her less feminine.  If we're getting that impression from a few posts, I'm positive that her FSIL is getting it from the actual experience of shopping with her.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    And she's come up with a compromise that sounds like the FSIL will like, too.  She never said she didn't want FSIL to look pretty, so don't put those words in her mouth- you get plenty grumpy when you think other people are doing that to you.  I think plain black shift dresses with sashes are pretty, and a pantsuit could also be chiffony and plenty feminine; it is all personal taste and just because they have different opinions doesn't mean she wants her FSIL to be ugly or not feminine.
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  • I dont think it's unreasonable to ask her to wear specific colors. Compromise on the style if she hates shift dresses and pants, but it's not bridezilla to ask her to wear black. Unless there's a cultural or religious reason why she won't wear black. I don't think it's a bad idea to just let her wear the bridesmaid dress if it'll put an end to the discussion. It's an outfit for one day and then it's over. It's naive to think that anyone else will notice or care what she's wearing or whose side she's standing on. The guest really, truly do not care about Details like this. You're within your rights to ask her to stick to a color scheme rather than let her get her way for colors, but my mantra is that I'd personally just rather get t something checked off the list even if it means that I'm the one who needs to compromise a bit. I'm too lazy to argue. It's not like she wants to wear purple to a pink and black wedding. I don't get why the groom isn't handling this if she's a grooms woman. Save yourself a headache and let HIM handle her, I say.
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  • ems27ems27 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:4a84500a-1ea2-4c2e-91bf-28c9812d6e43">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : It's not so much a color issue as a "you're standing on the side with the penises, so you're not allowed to look as pretty and feminine as the other girls" issue.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    This ^  Quotes implies you're quoting someone, in this case pinkandsilver's supposed thoughts.  Don't use quotes if you don't mean to be quoting.

    Aaaaaaand this issue was resolved before your PPs.  Getting sick of people for jumping pinkandsilver when she has already come to a reasonable compromise with FSIL that INCLUDES FSIL picking out a fancier dress.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:679a3de7-247e-492f-b1d3-8bc9ccbf9fca">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : This ^  Quotes implies you're quoting someone, in this case pinkandsilver's supposed thoughts.  Don't use quotes if you don't mean to be quoting. Aaaaaaand this issue was resolved before your PPs.  Getting sick of people for jumping pinkandsilver when she has already come to a reasonable compromise with FSIL that INCLUDES FSIL picking out a fancier dress.
    Posted by ems27[/QUOTE]

    Quotes also are used for clarity to set apart a phrase, which was clearly how she was using it there.  It's basic sentence construction.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • afeliz79afeliz79 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:679a3de7-247e-492f-b1d3-8bc9ccbf9fca">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : This ^  Quotes implies you're quoting someone, in this case pinkandsilver's supposed thoughts.  Don't use quotes if you don't mean to be quoting. Aaaaaaand this issue was resolved before your PPs.  Getting sick of people for jumping pinkandsilver when she has already come to a reasonable compromise with FSIL that INCLUDES FSIL picking out a fancier dress.
    Posted by ems27[/QUOTE]
    <div>Ummm. you don't seem to understand all the variety of uses for quotes.</div>
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  • ems27ems27 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:d313297a-a019-484b-b222-e7caaf73f79a">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : Quotes also are used for clarity to set apart a phrase, which was clearly how she was using it there.  It's basic sentence construction.
    Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]

    That doesn't take away from the context; she asked where she had said that OP didn't want FSIL to be as feminine, I showed her where she said that.

    And now we are getting far away from the main topic of this post, and the fact that she has come to a resolution about the issue already, so it really isn't necessary to continue accusing OP of not wanting her FSIL to feel comfortable or feminine with her attire for the wedding. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:97cd93dd-8030-42fd-a249-c3ccecde5457">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : That doesn't take away from the context; she asked where she had said that OP didn't want FSIL to be as feminine, I showed her where she said that. And now we are getting far away from the main topic of this post, and the fact that she has come to a resolution about the issue already, so it really isn't necessary to continue accusing OP of not wanting her FSIL to feel comfortable or feminine with her attire for the wedding. 
    Posted by ems27[/QUOTE]

    We're not accusing her of that, but we're pointing out that that's probably how it's coming across to her FSIL, whether she intends it or not. 
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

    image
    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
  • ems27ems27 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_fsil-groomswoman-issues?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:fe928098-3cfe-4bcc-a408-94935b80efbbPost:9b26653b-43d7-4d58-81db-13162804ffff">Re: FSIL groomswoman issues</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: FSIL groomswoman issues : Um, actually since this isn't THAT kind of quoting, which two different posters explained to you, it doesn't show that at all.  As Aerin said, quotation marks can also be used to set apart something that isn't meant to be taken as literally thought by the writer, like when responding to someone who is talking about having a real wedding vs a courthouse wedding, many of us will put "real" in quotes so no one mistakenly thinks WE as the poster typing believe that a courthouse wedding is not a real wedding. Sorry but a fail on your high school English teachers part does not constitute an issue on my part.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    <div>Once again, completely ignoring the fact that you were jumping on a poster for an issue that she had previously resolved.  Trying to insult me isn't going to change the fact that you were in the wrong for this one- it was beyond unnecessary to question OP's feelings and care for her FSIL (which is precisely what you were doing by calling it an issue of her not wanting her FSIL to look feminine), when she had <em>already resolved the issue to your satisfaction.  </em></div><div><em>
    </em></div><div>I have a low tolerance for the high and mighty, and your inability to restrain yourself from putting in your two cents when your issues with posters has already been resolved is absurd.  This is the second time you have tried to deflect your unwarranted, negative responses back on someone else for not really caring enough about quotation marks or something equally as trivial, without being able to accept that maybe you were possible wrong.  </div>
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