Dear Prudence,
When I was a baby, my biological father committed some terrible crimes. My mother’s testimony helped convict him, and she never truly recovered from his betrayal. She fled the state to avoid court-ordered contact between his family and myself. Fast forward almost 40 years. My relationship with my mother is not very close: I resemble my biological father a great deal physically and in temperament (although I am law-abiding). I have contacted my biological father, who is still in jail. I am interested in slowly getting to know him and maybe meeting some of the family I never knew, and they are open to this as well. But I am worried that my mom will cut me off if she ever finds out. Is cultivating a relationship with the half of my family I have never known worth possibly alienating my mother?