Dear Prudence,
Recently my teenage daughter told me her mom (my ex-wife) went to India for a vacation, but that she traveled there with a church group performing charity work. My ex has always been critical of organized religion, so her affiliation with a church was surprising—until my daughter told me her mom only went because the trip was cheaper that way. She feigned food poisoning for the majority of the trip to ditch the group and tour the area instead. I didn’t know how to respond to that information, so I said something vague and changed the subject. Last night my daughter told me she was traveling to Mexico with her mom—again, with a religious mission group. Her mom has already outlined how they will get out of their volunteer work to go to the beach, and my daughter is very excited for the trip. The situation makes me uncomfortable. Despite our bitter relationship, I try not to badmouth my ex around our child. But I also don’t want my daughter to follow her mom’s example. Is there something I can say or do?