Dear Prudence,
I live in a small apartment. Last week I went on vacation and my mother kindly came by to water my plants. After my return she told me she was shocked to see my apartment, that I was a slob, and wondered how could I live like that. She wondered what she did wrong with my upbringing and asked why I don’t do any chores. I don’t agree with her. The floor was clean, the kitchen was clean, there weren’t any dirty dishes or dirty clothes lying around. I have some paper stacks on my desk, and some bags of stuff I want to discard and the house was a bit dusty, but does this make me a slob? Not one of my friends have ever said something to me and when I visit other people, their apartments look either the same or worse. I think my mother is something of a cleaning maniac. It made me angry to hear her talk like that and I told her that I hear her but it is my apartment and I have to live here. My question is: Do I need to be more ambitious toward chores or is a little clutter acceptable? Is there some etiquette on cleaning I missed?
—Not a Slob