Dear Prudence,
My husband recently learned for the first time as the result of genetic testing that he has an 18-year old daughter. From what we’ve been able to gather, she was adopted as a baby and her biological mother identified a different father on her birth certificate. My husband has no idea who her mother is; he was not in a relationship during that time of his life and thinks it must have been a one-night stand. He was never contacted by the state she was born in or the adoption agency.
Now we’re not sure what to do. My husband replied courteously to his daughter’s email, providing a little background information and gently explaining that he can’t help identify her birth mother. He is not really interested in a relationship with her, but does not want to be cruel. We both assume it means a lot to her to have found him, although she said in her last message that she has a great life and is very happy. What should he do, and how can I help?
—Not Interested but Not Heartless