I started dating for the first time in years a few months ago, and I’ve met some great people I really like. But I’m not sure what to do when people ask me what I do for fun.
All my dates seem to have boundless time and energy and do so many amazing things, like queer activism, volunteering, making art, graduate school, travel, and feats of athleticism I can’t even imagine. I know not everyone does this, but my nonwork life seems small by comparison. I spend time with the people I love, I run a peer support group, I love cooking. I don’t watch much TV or movies, so I’m out of the pop culture loop. Most of my free time goes into managing my health problems, physical, neurological, and mental. I’m very functional. I’m good at my job, I take care of myself, and I’m a supportive family member and friend. So how do I talk about what I do in my free time without sounding like an alien? (I can’t even answer when someone asks what music I like!) And how can I feel more confident that I’m worth going on a date with, even though I don’t climb a mountain every morning and then do yoga at the peak?