Dear Prudence,
A decade ago, we extended a personal loan of over $10,000 to my father-in-law’s business. Instead, his daughter and her husband used it to take expensive personal trips, buy jewelry, and gamble. When the accountant came forward, it broke our family in half. My father-in-law ended up having a medical relapse and going into the hospital. We gave my sister-in-law a chance to repay the money rather than press charges. She and her husband refused. We took matters to the police. They ended up plea-bargaining down but showed no remorse, left town, and didn’t even bother to come back for my father-in-law’s funeral (but did have their lawyer call about the will—nothing was left to them, but there was an educational trust for all the grandchildren).
Their daughters were young when this happened; they are adults now. Neither of the girls has come forward to claim her portion of the trust, despite our lawyer sending official mail. I was able to find both of them easily on social media. I am torn—should I reach out and contact them personally? What should I say? What if they ask me about the estrangement?
—Long-Ago Grift