Dear Prudence,
I think I’m starting to lose it in my old age, or else my social skills are leaving me. A new guy started at my job about four weeks ago, and some of us have noticed that he often sounds condescending and even derogatory when he speaks (he doesn’t seem aware of this). Some of the others in the office ignore it or don’t notice, even seeking him out for approval because he almost always agrees with them (it might be worth mentioning that these are all higher-ups).
He often abruptly joins discussions that don’t involve him from across the room and reacts with over-the-top shock and dismay when someone doesn’t know something he thinks everyone should.
I have experienced people like this in the workplace before, but now I find myself less able to engage than I used to be. I pull myself out of interesting conversations with co-workers when he enters the picture. I thought it was just that my office has a superabundance of people who seem to require extra patience to deal with, but seeing how others seem to talk to each other so seamlessly makes me think maybe it’s just me.
—Is It Just Me?