Dear Prudence,
I am a young woman and physician in training. I am terrible with names and work with a rotating team of nurses, social workers, nursing assistants, and other physicians. I work at several hospitals on several teams. I tend to refer to people as “my dear” or “my love.” This includes everyone: my patients, other doctors I work with, social workers, etc. The other day at work, I was speaking with a staff member. I said, “Thank you so much, my dear, for your help earlier.” Later that day she told me she doesn’t like nicknames and asked me to call her by her name. I apologized and thanked her for telling me. In the future, I will call her by her name (which I won’t forget)! Is this a practice I should stop for everyone? I mean it kindly, and my intention is to be warm. I am cognizant of my role as the doctor with nurses and social workers (even if I am in my first year of training) and don’t want to come across as patronizing or make anyone uncomfortable. This interaction has made me second-guess myself. Am I no worse than a creepy male boss?! Is there a kind term of endearment that would be more neutral?